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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Oct062008

Cake Wrecks the Game Show?

Some cakes are like those ink blot tests you saw in grade school: baffling blobs of color open to interpretation. Well, not exactly; cakes are usually supposed to look like something in particular. Sometimes they taste better, too.

Anyway, since I've gotten a few of these "ink blot" type cakes submitted, I thought it'd be fun to add a little suspense to your daily dose of Wreckage. That's right, boys and girls, now it's time to play...

"Guess That Wreck!"

Everyone ready? Ok, clear your mind of all thoughts. Now, scroll down and tell me what you see:

"What's that? Ah, you see the moon cooking on the grill in a paper bag? [scribbling on notepad] Interesting, veeery interesting... [looking over glasses] And tell me, how IS your relationship with your mother?"

Check back tomorrow for the "answer": I'll post a picture of what the cake was supposed to look like. In the mean time, let's see who can come up with the most outrageous explanation. I may even post the top 3 guesses here, so bring on the funny, folks; fame and fortune await!*

Thanks to Dana W. for inspiring a brand new category! Oh, and Dana? Don't go giving away the answer just yet, k?

*By "fame" I mean a shout-out to your posting name, and "fortune" is used more in the "destiny" sense of the word than the "wealth or riches" sense. So in other words, no, you won't be getting any money*. Unless someone sends it to you, of course. But that someone would not be me. So probably not.

* Or begetting any money, either; 'cuz that'd just be weird. And wrong. But mostly weird.

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Reader Comments (574)

I'm going to say it's a football team carrying a giant casket? This guy's team spirit has just been laid to rest, I guess.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMal

Beanie floating on swamp water, bugs attacking the remains of the former owner's brains.

Rather sad tale, I think.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterA

It's a couch- presumably to watch the big game on (on what looks to be a hardwood floor?), adorned with the Saint's logo, with the helmets and numbers of the team around it?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRenee

My first thought was that it was a campfire, with the yellow and orange streaky parts being the flames and the brown part being a log. The fleur de lis is a Boy Scout or Girl Scout logo, isn't it?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMelinda

Thank goodness for Google image search.

The little helmets told me it had to be a sports thing. Football? Oh, hey, there's an NFL logo that features a black fleur-de-lis! Could this be their stadium?

Yeah, the infamous Superdome. Oh, here's the picture they used as a reference: http://www.mentalfloss.com/blogs/archives/1976

And here's where they learned about perspective:
http://scribalterror.blogs.com/scribal_terror/images/2007/06/07/tapestry7.gif

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBlossom Merz

I'm still puzzled over what is that cooking on the grill with some sort of beetles waiting with watering mouths.

Janet

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

An avant-garde Parisian interior decorator's worst adolescent nightmare cake? (aka - I was never chosen for the team so now you all must die!)

I.e. - A white, orange and yellow striped fleur de lis sofa that apparently someone has been murdered on, judging by the blood marks seeped into the seam. In front of that a rough-hewn, grill-marked, chunk-o-steak occasional table, with the whole she-bang being supported by the numbered, severed heads of football players. On gold lamé parquet.

And huddling behind the sofa... the shy, gray hunchback of dessssstiny...

Lisa

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I don't know about anyone else, but I'm seeing a rock lounging comfortably in a French bed held up by a row of Oreo cookies...or possibly bear claws. I'm not certain whether they're cookies or claws.

As for what it's actually meant to be, I haven't the foggiest notion.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTwistie

OK, IF the little helmets weren't there to indicate to me that SOMETHING football was related, um, well. Not sure, really. Some kind of orange thing on brown stuff, with a fleur delies stuck on there.

ACK.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterShelli

A giant rust-streaked stone memorial marking the site where a bunch of football players were massacred. Their bodies could not be identified; only their numbered helmets remain.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It's the crown jewels, right?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJo

It's a floating, burning funeral pyre for the Marquis De Sade!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTracy

It's got to be...

"When the Saints
Go Marching in
Oh When the Saints Go Marching In..."

Err, to be specific, I believe they are marching into post Katrina New Orleans in that particular cake. Because despite the similarity to the Superdome's silvery top, that thing is nothing a player would proudly call "Dome Sweet Dome".

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjengersnap

I just have to say that I was never good at the "hidden" picture pictures. You know, the ones where you look at it long enough and see what is really hidden. So, I'm sorry you now have 254 comments to read and mine is just babbling, but I love the game!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea Frederick

(Since you started the Freudian analysis, I'll end it ;) )

This is actually really poetic.

See, the cake represents the French flower thing in all of us struggling to escape from the ugliest vagina-representation this world has ever seen. This cake designer has been hurt. So hurt by women. Look at the angry red, the burning yellow, the scalloped looking sides. Oh such pain represented in this air brushed monstrosity. But, alas! all is not lost!

This horrid monster is dying on a grill! The epitome of masculinity! And what circles said grill? FOOTBALL HELMETS! All numbered to represent the females in his life that has hurt him.

WHY, NUMBER 47!? WHY!?!?

Do not mock this cake. It is a celebration of escape! Of survival! Horrah, cake designer. Horrah.



...No more Freud and Twinkie binges for me. It makes me loopy. :)

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

At first I thought it was supposed to be the bed of Louis XIV. Then I saw the football helmets and thought, "gee, Louis was into some pretty questionable things." Then it dawned on me that it was the Superdome, and I spent the next 10 minutes wishing Louis had indeed been schtupping the entire Saints lineup just so my cake sensibilities wouldn't have been so screwed up.

-Jen

This thing appeared right after they started doing those Big Bang experiments in Switzerland. There are no further logical assessments to be made.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterEP Hudziak

I instantly thought of a fireplace. Don't know why, just did.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterteri

It looks like I'm not the only one that has figured this out. It's the Superdome with the New Orleans Saints logo. The dome it at the top and the football field is on the bottom. I can't wait to see what the cake was supposed to look like!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLeila

This is *clearly* a French cheeseburger - they couldn't even get the order of the stacking right. (It's *bun*, burger, cheese, bun - not burger, *bun*, *bun*!)

It sits atop a bed of roasted potatoes - they're too "gourmet" for "freedom fries". ;)

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think it's supposed to reflect the Saints and the Superdome in New Orleans. But then again, maybe it's a Po-boy.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMelanie

Looks like a couch to me. With a coffee table in front of it. Don't really get the little helmets. Perhaps they're keeping the couch from revolting when they lose! Oops, too late.
The Superdome?....oh I hope not. I can see it, but I hope not.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCakeEater

It looks like a 2 bar electric heater of some kind.
The question is.... WHY?
'Happy Birthday Grandma, sorry you can't afford to heat your house?'

'My love for you is like an electric heater. uneconomical, outmoded, and slightly dangerous'?

Who knows?

S

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSarah Thomasin

I'm guessing it's the Superdome, but really it looks as though someone is trying to disguise the gates of hell by slapping on a French motif... :)

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commentereventualsense

It looks like an evil neon couch of doom fell on top of a football field.

-Angela J.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

To be honest it looked like a slab of soon-to-be-roasted-meat-tied-up-with-string and those little bits around it... when I first saw them I wondered how does striped bugs suppose to link with the roast meat? Or were they suppose to be olives :-p wouldn't have guessed it was a football stadium themed until I read the comments...

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRozi

I believe that it is a half-fileted rainbow trout with a piece of grilled tuna belly propping it up.

The silver part on the back is a tribute to serving wear throughout the ages, perhaps a montage on the dining sets once known as a child.

The helmets are for a game where whoever picks the number of the helmet that is closest to the number the baker is thinking wins a cake made by that baker, but only if it has something to do with fish insides. Helmets you ask, well why not. Rubber ducks would just be ridiculous on a cake...

The fleur de leis in the middle of the cake harkens back to the cake orderers heritage and symbolizes the seal of their forfathers.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRose

Looks like a slice of mutant-zebra butt above a strip of steak, topped with a black (poisonous?) orchid and lovingly adorned with chocolate bonbons. Yummy.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterR

Some very industrious little Boy Scout just finished his Eagle Award project and is being rewarded with this cake. The cake is obviously a campfire with hot dogs a marshmallows to represent all of the camping that Boy Scouts do. Oh, yeah...and a rock to sit on while camping. I totally see it!!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Liebers

Oh, I know this one! It's the Fire Temple from Zelda (Ocarina of Time). Yup.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNonnaKosten

It's some odd looking piece of sushi being carried away by ants wearing football helmets. Right??

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJill in MA

while at first glance, it looks like a sacrificial rite using the fleur de lis, I see tiny football peeps, so it must be the saints' stadium.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor

Man I read some of the comments about it being a football stadium and having football helmets. Well.... I had no idea what they were talking about I thought the helmets were bugs or weird rocks around some poorly constructed Treasure chest. yeah when I first looked at it I didn't have a clue what it could be!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSummie

It looks like a giant, rotten hamburger but the entire football team has gathered around to enjoy. Oh, wait, I mean "enjoy." The top bun is gray from the mold that has overtaken any remnants of what could possibly be bread...the next layer is the cheddar cheese that is so old it's all hard and crusty. The next layer is the mostly raw hamburger with ketchup and mustard running down the sides and the bottom layer is the bottom of said hamburger bun that is not only moldy and rotten but has some pieces of truly disgusting lettuce still hanging on for dear life. Um ew!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJill

It's the Superdome! Geaux Saints!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterregan

I would have to agree with everyone else. It looks like it is supposed to be a football stadium. But supposed to look like and does look like are two different things.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterbex.

Before I noticed the helmets, I thought it looked like grill lines on something, maybe 2 burritos and a steak or 2 pieces of fish and a piece of beef. Like a grilled sushi dish or something.

Then I saw the helmets. And the fleur-de-lis. And then my brain exploded.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commentercrazymonkeycreates

The lid has come off Hell. There is something horribly raw, dead and flayed, and something else that is burned to crisp, and a bunch of numbered coffee beans lined up around the outside.

Whatever it is, it's a great appetite supressant, squishing any desire for salmon, sushi, barbecued meat, cake, cappucino and football games...

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterkitchenrefugee

Well at first it looked like a couch with a fleur-de-lis on it, then it looked like an inside out hamburger with the bun on the inside of the burger and onion with a lot of bugs chowing down on the beef. But the color choices, the black fleur-de-lis, and the many football helmets with numbers on the outside made it obvious that it was a New Orleans Saints reference. And after a little bit of google searching, it's pretty obvious it's a side view of the Superdome.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAaron James Patterson

The depiction is obvious to me.

The mothership descends, dropping a giant flying alien beetle. Meanwhile the armored ladybugs man the lasers in their bunker and fire back in defense.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRabid Child

Well, the football helmets and fleur de lis do give it away, but I'm still very eager to see what it's supposed to look like.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

If (for the sake of argument) this IS a "football stadium" of some sort, why are all the "players" standing around outside the gates?? Not only are they nearly as tall as the stadium that they play in, but I have NEVER seen a team fill in when the rent-a-cops fail to show up for work before a game.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Listen! you've got it all wrong. I will tel you what it is!
*little cough*
Well, off course it is a HAT. Te colors reference to dark secrets, so i guess it's made for a maffia-guy of for mr Death. It's also a bit rotten, that makes it two points for mr Death. the third layer is covered with puke - from a chipmunk, a very drunk chipmunk. With one paw (yes! he had a hard life). the things under the Wreck are olives, for sure, with some ants to make it look more - intersting. It is absolutely a masterpiece.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNicky

A giant hot dog...um...nestled in a football field? Ow, my brain. >.<

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterksaldria

Ok, i know its supposed to be the superdome (with helmets), but it looks like the superdome AFTER the hurricane and little roaches (or june bugs) are crawling away with it. Ewww

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBeckster

It looks like the Superdome is sitting on top of the Saints. Maybe, since they are playing tonight, someone from Minnesota is hinting that they are going to squash New Orleans on MNF.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterShannon

The emblem is for Boy Scouts. So the wood and the perfect fire on a grill of perfectly split logs would be in celebration of their campfire badge?? Just a guess. I have no idea about the stripes on the rocks on the border, however.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjoyce

Steak and salmon on a hot boulder grill, held up by tiny little football players. Some kind of tailgate party gone seriously wrong. LOL! (Ok, I know it's supposed to be the Superdome, but dayum!!)

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChicka

I was going to guess a grill of some kind... But alot of people keep saying "superdome" so I'm changing my guess to that to sound smartish.

:)

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermel

Ew, to me it looked like bad teeth over rotting gums - a warning of what happens when you eat cake?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterkate

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