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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Nov052008

Oh, Mama!

Who's ready for some life-sized, potentially-nightmare-inducing, definitely traumatizing, yet fortuitously-censored CAKE? Hmm?

Settle down, now, all of you; there's enough here for everyone:

(Heh, you guys thought the FIRST censored Cake Wreck was bad...)

What's that? What do you mean, you all only want a piece of the little birthday cake? You can't ALL have that: who's going to eat the legs? The belly? The.. er...tracts of land? C'mon, you'll love it: mama's made of red velvet!*

:)

Here's an even "better" angle:


John would like me to point out that this cake has teeth. And there are so many things wrong with that statement, I don't even know where to begin.

Here's some good news, though: this wasn't for a baby shower! Yay! Nope, it was served at a birthing center event. As to why the "mom" has a cake in the tub with her, though - and in that particular spot - well, you got me. I'm just glad they didn't make it into an edible baby.
Also, I've heard of cakes sweating before, but this brings it to a while 'nother level. A really shiny, gross level.

I actually had this submitted twice, by both Gina & Jeanette E. Hey girls, I'm dying to know: did "mama" have any hair? I can't quite tell from the photos. (I mean on her HEAD, you sick people, you.)

* Ok, you got me: I don't actually know what kind of cake this was.

UPDATE: I too thought that they just left the "s" off "surprise" at first, but then it would have been "urprise", not "uprise". Unless they spelled it wrong, and THEN left the "s" off - hah, double wreck! Or, I suppose it could be the name of the center.

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Reader Comments (293)

How disturbing! Also, is it just me or does this cake look like a MAN?!? I mean, look at the size of "her" neck! And that jawline...It's like Arnold in "Junior" all over again... eew.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLBrianne

That is absolutely insane! I just can't believe how far they went with that one!

BTW, LOVE your blog! It's definitely my favorite on my list!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterErin Emigh Stanford

I think that the birthday cake is hiding a special surprise. I do believe she's giving birth, or am I the only one to see a head and ear?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRebecca

Hair? It doesn't even look as though she has the upper third of her SKULL!

*shiver*

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMoon

Ohhh.Dear.

Oooooooh Dear. Birthing center or not... uhhh tacky.

Nightmare inducing. Ohhhh Dear.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Oh for the love of all that's good and holy!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterVanessaS

NO, NO, NO!!!! This is so wrong! At first i thought it was a really potbellied man due to the very strong jaw line! its sick!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterVashti

This cake is so wrong on so may levels...

Erin

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterErin T.

Oh my, that is nearly traumatizing.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

Ugh. With this Skeletor face I think you should have posted it for Halloween.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRobin Brodeur

And the pregnant cake has major man neck to boot. If I ever look that freaky when I'm pregnant I hope someone will put me out of my misery by slicing me up into tiny pieces and serving me on dessert plates.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMy Ice Cream Diary

P.S. Are those remnants of a weak bubble bath or is it just body scrudge floating on the surface of the water?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMy Ice Cream Diary

!

Yikes

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterApril

I'm wondering why they even bothered to put a "cloth" over the woman's face, let alone why the secondary cake is in that rather... strategic spot.

And speaking of that second cake, there are some serious spacing issues going on there: "Happy Birth" are written on top, and "Day" is on the side. Pick a surface and stick to it, for crying out loud!

As a nice final Wrecktastic touch, I also love the lack of the "S" on the "uprise" banner. Just awesome.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKari Ann

I know you had to be saving this one for the day after the election--I thought nothing could possibly pull get me thinking past the election results :( ...I should have known CakeWrecks could! :)

Now I can't get past this cakewreck-- but at least I can laugh at that! :)

I have to add...OH...MY. I don't...know...what to say.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterour3qtgirlz

Where's the back of her head?! It's like a horror movie prop.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterannenahm

uprise? at first i thought it was a tragic misspelling of SURPRISE, like for a surprise baby shower? but oh no. maybe the birthing center is called Uprise? which is a WEIRD name for a birthing center...it's a quandary.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

Oh. My. *covers eyes*

That cake may very well give me nightmares.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNimras

That is just WRONG!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commentersues2u2

okay, this is way past creepy.. who eats the face, or the STRAINING neck muscles... good grief!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly

Wow. While I'm probably not as surprised as I once would have been by this mom-strosity, having been a faithful cake follower from the beginning, I'm confused about the "UPRISE" sign...maybe I'm being obtuse, but could somebody help me out here?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAllison

Oh my.. that woman just farted a cake!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Wow. I really don't know what to say....and that's saying a lot!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

OK, I saw this and my first thought (also uttered out loud) was Ewwww!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDenise

delurking to say...it looks like she's been in the bath a little too long! she's a bit pruney! either that or she's taking a bath in embalming fluid because she looks mummified!

how do you decide which piece to eat? who wants the belly button? the boob? left or right?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commentershanna

In my humble opinion... this is the scariest cake I have ever seen.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

I...don't even...have...words...

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteramanda

I would also like to know the significance of it saying "UPRISE" on the tub. Seriously are we supposed to attack the poor woman giving birth to a cake...it it some kind of crazy mutation. I mean really...who thought this was a good idea?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTracy F.

Jeanette EEEEEEEEE
hehe, but thats ok

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJeanette Engler

Even if you were brave enough to have a piece o' mama - how thick/tall are the slices from the belly? I mean, even if it wasn't gross (sweaty icing? eew), they'd just be huge. No. No thank you.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterGayle Carline

Did somebody already start nomming on the head, or is there any other reason in particular half of her head is missing?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterVonniej

Cake Wreck? More like a cake DISASTER! That is definitely one of the most disturbing cakes you have brought to us yet.

Just a slight step up from using too much brown frosting, or a spelling mistake, huh?

Do you think there are any professional cake decorators out there who say "um, I'm sorry, but no, I don't think I can make that cake."?

Wow.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterM K Glass

That is totally disturbing! Can just mention what the heck is up with the sign? Is it supossed to say 'surprise'?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSarah S

This is so incredibly desturbing I don't even know where to begin...however I do think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth if that gives you any idea!!!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie

What I want to know is - did they mean to leave the S off? I mean, the cake IS enough to cause an uprise...

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermlanezoo

I'm not sure what's more disturbing - that someone requested a cake that looks like a pregnant woman in a tub (and lifesize at that!) or that someone would agree to making it...

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJen

This is beyond disgusting! So wrong on so many levels. And what is the "UPRISE" all about?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I am absolutely speechless. This wreck has crossed a line.

My colleague who sits next to me has just left the room after glimpsing my screen. I don't know whether he's going to be sick, or if he's going to report me for looking at these kind of horrible images on work time.

Wrong, wrong, wrong!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJ. Applebee

Oh man, a baby cake on that little plate would have been hilarious!! What would be even better, though, would be an edible baby under the water, being born. Lots of red food coloring in the bathwater...

Yeah... I've got a sick, sick mind.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPhoenix

So disturbing.

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteramyd

Oh wow - Mama's legs look like they have varicose veins (the icing is strange)... double ewwwww

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKarin

That cake is HUGE! And a little terrifying

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterChristina

"Uprise?" I assumed at first it was a spelling error. . .or is it inciting us to riot?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJordanBaker

Not only does that cake have teeth, it appears to be a man. A naked, pregnant man in a bath. *shudder*

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLoth

Wow.. that is disgusting!

Remembering how nauseous I was when pregnant, that certainly would have frightened the heck out of me for giving birth, and I probably would have puked!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Seeker

The face looks like a mummy! I was looking at King Tut and other mummies faces yesterday in an article and this cake is eerily similar.

It really isn't life like at all... I don't think it was a good idea! Icky!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHotCake

looking at that makes me feel sick. I was eating my yogurt and had to stop. Yack!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJenny

Yuk!

Really Really gross on all accounts!
~Hyla
From GreenEarthJourney

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHyla Waldron

Eeew, do you think when they cut open the tummy there is a cake baby inside?
Bleah!

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterrrr

oh my god. i can't imagine anyone cutting her belly and eating it.
Kind of ... gross?

November 5, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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