My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

The Amercian Way

It's Veterans Day here in the U.S.: a day we set aside to honor those who have and are serving in our country's military. There are many fabulous ways to do this.

This is not one of them.

Now, I happen to know that a fair number of military personnel read this blog - a fact I find both humbling and just a teensy bit alarming, since I'm not sure those who share my twisted sense of humor should have access to heavy artillery. (Holy Hand Grenade, anyone?) On the other hand, I do so enjoy all the e-mails with the giant "DECLASSIFIED" stamps on them - and I'm pretty sure my coolness quotient went up about 1000% when a guy in uniform asked to have his photo taken with me at our last signing in Atlanta. (Hi, Paul!)

So in your honor, my dear veterans, here are some patriotic cake designs that will surely bring a tear to your eyes.

Because nothing says "America" quite like a dead, blank-eyed dog with a flag stuck in his head. [patting heart] Ah, it gets you right here, doesn't it?

The underline is what really sells it.

Of course today is about you, the troops:

And as "Owl Troops" you deserve "Supott."

Because you are all "Hero's."

And so we "honer" you, our "vetr ans."

Kind of like how we honor the flag, the symbol of this great nation:


No wait, I take that back: this Wreck leaves me shaken, not stirred. [ba dum bump!]

So remember, everyone: thanks to our veterans we have the freedom to live in this great country: the United States...

...of Amercia.

Michael H., Holly F., Tara L. Sara Beth, Nikki G., Adria P., & Tory L., I'm sure the CIA had nothing to do with that.

- Related Wreckage: Taking Liberties

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Reader Comments (115)

Of all the mispellings and deformed animals I see on this site, the thing that always hurts my eyes the most is the misplaced apostrophe! It is NOT THAT HARD, people. C'mon now. *shudder*

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterandygirl

I'm pretty sure the "Supott Owl Troops" one really does say "Our", with odd handwriting. That still leaves the "Supott", though.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJasini

lol@ Joanne-- you (and of course, Jen!) are cracking me up today!

And @Taylor-- "the death of disco..."*guffaw*

"Amercia" should've tried "the USA" instead-- but at least the last one had better penmanship going for it.

WV: prophs-- "prophs" to whoever wreckported the death of blue today!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterOh, Mandy

Why don't they just make poppy cakes? They could probably even make a dreaded ccc poppy cake look halfway decent, and they wouldn't have to spell anything.

WV: Termitt. What got into the dog cake to make it so saggy.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFamous Hat

Where are the flag desecration laws when you need them???

Oh, well...I'm still proud to be an "Amercian".

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Courteous Chihuahua

Sometimes I've laughed till I cried while reading this blog. Today I just cried. It has been an emotional week. Thank you, troops and veterans everywhere! Kathi

wv: normol - Misspellings on this blog are completely normol and to be expected.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkadyb

This has got to be, in sum total, the ugliest collection of cakes yet (and ugly giant cookies, and whatever that pockmarked thing with the red-white-and-blue ribbon is).
Apparently, many bakers will spare no hideousness in order to "Supott owl troops."

The melted blue animal with a flag stuck in its head must be trying to send some message, but I'm afraid to speculate on what that message might be.

Anyway, happy Veteran's Day to all Owl Troops, past and present.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Because nothing says "America" quite like a dead, blank-eyed dog with a flag stuck in his head. [patting heart] Ah, it gets you right here, doesn't it?

Oh Gawd! No my whole office knows I'm looking at your site. Too freakin funny!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"God Bless Amercia" made me lol. Holy Hand Grenade- smooooth. I just watched Holy Grail last night, when I really should have been writing a poem for English.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Spanish Inquisitor

here in Canada we are also "honering" our "trops" I hope that blank eyed dog doesn't make his way to a cake near an army base near my favourite man in uniform. ( Navy whites dress even - so swoony) Ahem I digress. That dog has me still spewing coffee and falling out my chair... don't know why.

God Bless our vets and service men and women in both countries... and spare them wreckiness... they have enough to contend with.
Attehn-SHUN - saluting and leaving proud to be Canadian and friend to Americans!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarieA

God Bless Amercia, and please, Lord, inspire us to learn to spell.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGary

not the holy hand grenade of Antioch

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

Re: 7th down.

I'm proud to live in the great 32 states of America.

Because if you're going to take the time to dot out 32 stars on a cake you should have taken the time to dot out more.

W.V. "bature" A combination of the terms "bat" and "manure." Quite efficient.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterE.M. Green

Thank you, Cake Wrecks, for being here so I have a place to vent about grammatical errors. Frankly, I think my husband is tired of hearing I have noticed a growing epidemic in this country. Misused apostrophes, I believe, are going to be the death of me! Ok, maybe not the DEATH of me, but I can certainly picture myself in an insane asylum one day drawing "'s" all over the ceiling.
Why do people think that there must be an apostrophe to add an "s" to a word??
I have one word for those people: Idiocracy.
If you haven't seen the movie yet, rent it today! Our nation is in peril!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

"Jon and Becky said...
One cake
under frosting
with buttercream
and crusties for all."

That was great!
"We pledge allegiance,
to the wreck, of the "united" state's of Amercia.
And to the bakery,
that made the mess,
one cake, under frosting, indecipherable,
with buttercream and (sprinkles) for all."

Thanks for the inspiration, Jon and Becky! and Jen, of course!
(ho'ws my punctuation? :P )

Also, Gary, you might be right. You remind me of Lucca Brazzi's fate in the "Godfather" when they sent the Corleones the dead fish (message: Lucca Brazzi sleeps with the fishes (translation he's dead and dunked).

What COULD a dead blue melting pooch mean? The lapdog/fuzzy slipper/windex drenched mop/rogue- wave-with-a-face sleeps with the flag?"

Does that help? Does that make sense? (no, of course not. that's why it's wrecky. sorry!)

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJoanne

where are the pics from the atlanta event???
my mother went & i need pictures!!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNikki

Thanks for posting this, guys! You have lots of military spouse readers too :)

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

These cakes are...
well, words fail me!
And to think the "Amercia" one was so pretty!

Proud to be an Amercian!!!

WV: redpi. I'd rather eat RedPi than some of these cakes :)

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAimerzzz(:

Yay! Dead dogs and flag pieces. What a great tribute to the veterans of Amercia! LOL

Happy Veterans Day, everyone!
Amy B-H

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

This post is going to make me snicker uncontrollably all day!
Loved meeting ya'll at the book signing here in ATL!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBeth

I'm pretty sure some of these cakes count as acts of treason...

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

I thought someone had killed.. and frozen Chewbacca... but I can see it being the severed head of a dog as well... ick

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermzmclean

"Those who share my sense of humor shouldn't have access to heavy artillery." Ha!

No, no, the REAL meaning of Veteran's Day is that it is the eve of my birthday!

Yep. All preparations for Twirly Day on Nov 12.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTwirly McSwirl

great wrecks today(as usual). recently gave the 'cakewrecks' book to my mum for her birthday... the whole family passed it around and took turns guffawing at it, so thanks for that! my grandad was a 'desert rat'(a british soldier stationed in africa) in wwii. feeling patriotic today(both u.k. & u.s.a.).

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

You know, I can forgive that second-to-last cake for being off by about 17 stars, since people generally aren't going to count as long as it it looks like a lot. I can even forgive the fact that they aren't in the correct pattern.

But they're also missing seven stripes, and they're out of order. Not to mention the star section being just as long as the rest of the flag.

Also, the dead dog cake is horrifying.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commentercapri-chan

So the "blue dog" looks like BOB from "Monsters vs. Aliens"- a most excellent movie!!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

mooP said...
"Oh, and those cakes were purchase in a store less than a mile from the White House!"

So people really do buy these things?

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSally

Why does that underline look alot like 'less than or equal to' the USA. Just so we don't make other countries feel too bad. They might be equal to us. Or might not be. I like a wishy washy nation w/ confidence.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterF

And in Canada it's remembrance day!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSheila

You would think, with the popularity of the TV show Heroes, that they would at least spell that correctly!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnna C. Morrison

"I'm not sure those who share my twisted sense of humor should have access to heavy artillery."

You make me laugh. Dangerous, indeed!

'Thanks' to all our veterans and active military. You guys rock.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous


"who had English as a second language. Or third."

It's pretty ridiculous to assume that incorrect spelling can only come from non-native English speakers. For instance, I speak English as a second language, yet I teach it to native speakers who can't write English correctly to save their lives.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLujza

Somehow I don't see the USMC taking on this blue devildog as a mascot. Poor thing.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

Chuckle. Good one. Blue dog comments were especially gut bustin' today.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarcie

Wow. Um, yeah, wow. I got nothing else.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

Honestly, Jen, the best part about your site isn't the pictures. It's the commentary. Thanks again for all you do to entertain us!


November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@ Joanne--But at least most of these got sprinkles, right?---LOL!!!!!

Great post and great comments!

Thanks to all our veterans and active military personnel! You are all fabulous!

~Bonnie B :)

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBonnie

So by "owl troops" maybe they mean this:

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGnat

America: Where we support people's freedom to wreck cakes beyond recognition! =D

Seriously, many many thanks to our vets and ones who currently serve. We couldn't wreck in peace and freedom without you!

WV: Redblegu: How the wreckorator mangled "red white and blue".

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

Stephanie in College Station, TX said: Still rolling on the floor! I never cease to be amazed at the wrecks!!

We send our heartfelt thanks to all who served and are serving our country!!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterpinkspope

@Famous Hat?Yes why don't they make poppy CCCs? It's both relieving but disappointing not seeing wrecks in my local bakery.

Happy Veterans and Remembrance Day!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

As a Vet, (Air Force), I do appreciate anyone who takes the time to show us support and appreciation. Even if it is technically ....flawed.

Thank you bakers.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMatt

Sooo proud to be Canadian right now.

And very proud of our troops as well as those of our southern neighbour.

WV - 'warstat': fitting.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMichelleP

As a veteran of Iraq and Afghanistan, this brings a tear to my eye. Not the good kind, mind you.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJames

Stars? Naw. Blue seashells
warm the cockles of any
patriotic heart.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

I am proud to live in Amercia. Where people are allowed to be illiterate.


November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

As a Navy deployment wife (and a pastry student) I can say thank you for posting these! And I will be sure to let my husband know the people he fights for think they live in Amercia. Wow, that word even hurt to type!

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMadameNoir

I've been singing "God Bless Vespucciland" all this time.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Seems like there's some confusion with the wrong kind of vets today! Blue dogs, Owl Troops... still, I am grateful that there were no attempts at eagles that I can determine. That coulda been real messy.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The misguided patriotic cakes are always some of the best (I use the term loosely) aren't they? I'm so glad there are at least three holidays per year where we are blessed with them.

The flag on the last one isn't bad. The dog, however, is unspeakably so.

Go Amercia!!! (And thanks troops!)


November 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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