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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Nov042009

New Discoveries in the Animal Kingdom

I believe that all new scientific discoveries should be announced via cake, don't you?

[pushing back glasses and consulting clipboard] Ladies and gentlemen, I'm proud to present...

The Majestic Bagel-Nosed Falcon of Uganda!

Or it might be a fish. Fish...falcon...you know. Whatevs.


[Shuffling papers] Next we have...

The Majestic Happy Chicken-Footed Spiny-Backed Slime Devil.
(Watch out; they spit.)

We're still working on the scientific name for this one:

So for now let's just call it the Majestic Coiled Crap Hound.
(I think that has a real ring to it, don't you?)

Here we have a particularly colorful specimen:

The Majestic Disco Newt! Let's pause a moment to admire his beautiful plumage.

Right. That's long enough.

And finally, we have...


The Majestic Three-Toed Four-Eyed Whiskered Zebra Toad.
(Yeah, you heard me. ZooBorns, eat your heart out.)

Thanks to Kelly D., Kit R., Caitlin B., Jordan J. and Donald L., who are all, er, majestic.

- Related Wreckage: Sideshow Slideshow

« Sporty Spice Cakes | Main | Call Me! »

Reader Comments (190)

OMG! I can only hope these are inside jokes, otherwise there are some seriously disturbed cake decorators out there! http://blog.sweetservices.com/sweetscandyblog/

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPam Walter

I think the disco newt is supposed to be a kid's toy (my son has a turtle a lot like that; it lights up and plays highly irritating music). Sort of like this one:
http://www.seatoys.cn/product/en_product_view.asp?version=en&id=908" rel="nofollow">http://www.seatoys.cn/product/en_product_view.asp?version=en&id=908

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRaven

Great post, Jen! One of your best!

LMAO!!

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

I think the bottom one's supposed to be an abstract kitty. It *does* look awful froggy though, now that you've brought my attention to it. LOL!

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLaser Potato

Really, no one else saw this in the disco newt? No one?
http://www.time.com/time/photogallery/0,29307,1870689_1823247,00.html

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKathryn H

Yay! Uganda made it on cakewrecks. I see so many wrecks in my country but I'm too shy to just take pictures of cakes I can't buy. Next time I'll just take a picture and run. LOL. Thank you for acknowledging our country. I'm doing a dance for joy. I just wish it was a Sunday Sweet. Heh.

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commentercarlo

My 18 month old saw me looking at the fish/falcon and immediately supplied the sound effects "Rowr Rowr!"

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSandi

I clicked on the ZooBorn link and have decided that the coiled crap hound is the baby echidna from their site!

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterI Love Baby Quilts!

CRAP HOUND???????? I think I'm going to cry myself to death laughing.

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCarmen Keys

I think the first one might actually be this: http://www.imperfectparent.com/books/articles403_1.php

Look at the critter in the lower right hand corner.

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWendy S

Majestic Coiled Crap Hound? Hilarious!

November 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenter*~*Lis*~*

oh HILARIOUS! The Aladdin reference just about made ME spit...on the keyboard...

Word verification: DISLO. Short for dislocate, as in, "The wreckerator did her best, but since she was working with a dislo'd shoulder, her fancy design didn't turn out as majestic as she'd hoped."

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered Commentertigerdeus

I belive the first one is a TOUFURKEY! LOL
Swoozie

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

What the heck were those wreckorators ON?? I think I'd like some...

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

Look Mom - its an albino nerd!

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLindsay

Coiled Crap Hound is my favorite...I just snorted green tea through my nose. You guys are funny. Damn funny.

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKim From Jersey

I think the disco newt is supposed to be a character from the children's show Barney.

The other stuff creeps me out to much to take too close of a look!

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterClair

This one had me laughing out loud and brought tears to my eyes!! SO needed that! You are brillz!!

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSara Warhold

Majestic Coiled Crap Hound.
Coffee actually shot out my nose.

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I want the Majestic Disco Newt for my next birthday present. You could play Ludo on his back if you so fancied.

The Coiled Crap Hound is the first wreck in a while that made me want to puke.

Nice finds Jen and John.

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFyrebyrd

I LOVE the Majestic Coiled Crap Hound--what a great name for a breed!

Caroline

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

My 6-yr old immediately called bagel-face sheep, and the mutant zebra mating frogs were a "crazy dog"

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjo

The disco newt is sorta cute!

November 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSixxlet

Not that you will ever read this, but my face hurts from laughing so hard. I should never read this after drinking a Pepsi. Not so good on tummy.
The commentary is nothing short of fantastic. :)

November 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChristina

Christina,

Of course we read it. We read all the comments. Thank you for the kind words.

john

November 7, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

Is the not-so-majestic crap hound meant to be an armadillo? The Happy Chicken-Footed Spiny-Backed Slime Devil meant to be a *shudder* crocodile. And although it is colourful enough to have us c*&^ing crayons is the Disco Newt a turtle?

no comments on the rest *ahem, ahem*

account still not letting me sign in -gr.

November 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRicebubbles

Oh these are soooooooo good :) They really made me laugh. Thanks for this beautiful site!

November 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAdnan Smajlovic

I don't care what anyone thinks, that last one is clearly a stormtrooper head.

November 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMiscellaneousLibrarian

Oh good, it's the lovechild of Birdo and a Cheep-Cheep from Super Mario. I was afraid I might never know what it would be like.

November 7, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterfunnycide

I think the crap hound is supposed to an armadillo? Either way its funny.

November 7, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersleeplessnights04

My 7 year old son thinks the Coiled Crap Hound should be called the Crapadillo. : )

November 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAllison

Is Disco Newt up for adoption? He's KYOOOOT!!!!!!

November 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDakota's Mom

oh man... those are freakin' hilarious. i can't stop laughing. its hard to see the screen with these tears of hysteria streaming down my cheeks! that made my monday!

November 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJill

That's not a coiled craphound! That's a http://www.popsci.com.au/molika-ashford/article/2008-09/tiny-naked-astronauts" rel="nofollow">tardigrade or waterbear, one of the world's hardiest living species! Of course, it seems to have lost its middle set of legs, but you'll agree the resemblance is impressive.

November 11, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

My 3 year old says that the 'Majestic Bagel-Nosed Falcon of Uganda!' cake is a sheep in a fish tank, of course.

November 15, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRainyday

The Majestic Three-Toed Four-Eyed Whiskered Zebra Toad I think is actually doing something "unmentionable". It is 2 "animals" not one as far as I can tell. I know for us foodies cake is sexual...but not in that sense of the word!

November 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The dog actually looks like an armadillo because of the coiled-ness. :)

November 28, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterR-Kar

*GASP*...Trying to breathe... not succeeding... laughing to hard... This is my favorite post ever! THANK YOU JEN FOR LIGHTING THE WORLD with your Bagel-nosed falcon of Uganda, Majestic Coiled Crap Hound, Majestic Disco Newt, and Four Eyed Zebra Toad(?), and your hilarious commentary.

WV: sesenerb
I sesenerbed the chicken with sesenherb.

December 16, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

My 13 year old and son and I were rolling around, laughing at the Bagel-Nosed Falcon of Uganda. Days later, he is still asking to come see this page again. Thank you for the laughs!!

December 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLori

1-It's a sheep. It is very (un?)clearly a SHEEP!
2-Yikes. Nuff said.
3-Ouch.
4-It a beach ball!
5-Is dat a cat? A mouse?

October 30, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterPiFan

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