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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Dec182009

Seasoning's Greetings

There are plenty of reasons why you might not want to wish someone a merry Christmas.

Maybe you're trying to be more inclusive of the cooking community:


Or you're celebrating the oft-overlooked "Hally Days":


Or perhaps you want all of their various "hollidays" to be happy:


Or maybe - just maybe - you're trying to get your friend Roxanna a goodbye cake but all the bakery has on hand are stock Merry Christmas designs so you're forced to make do with one of those and then hope the Wreckerator on duty doesn't screw up your instructions too badly.

But that's just a guess.

Annie J., Kat I., April B., & Kimberly I., I think it's high time we all agreed that "Winter, underlined" really is the best greeting of the season - don't you?

- Related Wreckage: In Which Happy Tanks SHOULD Be Given, But Are Not

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Today's charity, Love146, has one simple, compelling, gut-wrenching goal: "The abolition of child sex slavery and exploitation. Nothing less." If you have a box of tissues nearby, read how they got their name. Then go give that dollar - or maybe a few.

Click here to donate via our First Giving Campaign page.

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Reader Comments (67)

Two weeks ago I participated in a local fashion show fundraiser for Love146, it's so great to see them getting some attention! They are awesome and it is such a worthy cause. I love that you are doing your part to make sure the holiday is about giving to others rather than about "getting stuff". Thanks, Cakewrecks!

December 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJoan Bennett

YOu made me cry at work with that link.

December 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Today's charity touched me. I was so sickened by how people can do this to little children I decided to donate my lunch money. Thank you for bringing ALL of these great charity's to light. I have donated a little something everday and have posted a link on my Facebook page everday hoping that my friends and family will feel inclined to share as well. Thank you for CW for opening your hearts and using your web-fame for good!

December 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJamie Reed

Dear Powers That Be at CW :) You may already have the rest of your charity's picked out to finish of your days of giving, however, if you don't I would like to throw one out there. The Mission Continues is a charity that works with injured Service Members who will not be able to return to "normal" jobs, but still want to contribute to society. The objective is to teach these wounded heroes skills so that their communities may see them as an asset and not an inconvienence. I have personally met the found Eric Grietens and have heard him speak. I also know one of their "fellows" and how much his life was changed. http://missioncontinues.org/

Thank you for all you are doing!

December 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJamie Reed

I just made a small donation to Love146. I'm glad you are doing this and hope everyone who can make a donation will.

That said why is there a big squashed blue bug on the first cake?

December 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJerry

Thank you for letting us be a part of helping these wonderful charities! I wanted to nominate an organization called Love Thy Neighbor (lovethyneighbor.org), which gives homeless folks culinary training. It is a really small group, which you'll be able to tell from their modest website, but a worthwhile cause nonetheless. (Here's how I first heard of them: http://www.thisamericanlife.org/Radio_Episode.aspx?sched=1094)
Again, thanx! You rule!

December 18, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMel

I am compelled to respond to your, "Winter, underlined," greeting. Such blatant hemisphere-ism has no place in a humor blog. I and my family have been living in Australia for almost four months now, so I feel fully entitled to speak for everyone here, not to mention everyone in the rest of the southern hemisphere: It's SUMMER! It's 115 degrees! The birds are building nests, the school kids are on vacation and swim classes are starting up. Assuming the world is celebrating YOUR season is blatantly narrow-minded and highly offensive to those of us slathered in SPF 40, making sweat angels on the patio. Half the world is not in Winter, undelined. May I suggest you think of a more inclusive greeting.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRegina

The ornaments with the bone snowflakes were kinda pretty. Shame, wreckerator! "in place of" indeed!

The penguins were cute. Maybe a chef COULD use that. After all, they may show their mad skillz in seasoning their food for guests if they're hosting a party.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjoanne

@ Catherine--Good idea! Or maybe the penguins could at least wear chef hats. so. close.

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thanks for pointing out the kidneys, dear readers. (or are they lungs?) Perhaps "hollidays" are days of improved health due to a diuretic, passing a kidney stone, etc. So it's like a good health cake!

and what IS that blue squashed thing? did a hannukah cupcake heavy laden with blue icing fall over on the cake? and the wreckerator just pulled off the cakey part and wrapper and left it there, pretending it was part of the original decoration? since it didn't smear their Hally message...

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjoanne

I just wanted to tell you I'm so happy to see you sharing these charities with all of us. I am personally not currently able to donate, but I'm definitely planning on coming back to this when I can!! I have taken some of the links and passed them on through other forums--the more the word gets out, the more that will be donated!!

You are both amazing for focusing your Christmas celebrations around this, and encouraging others to do so as well :)

December 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commentervmdesign

when I read this I pictured the kids that use the homeless head start in our building. I pictured them going through this. Some might. They're homeless and so are perhaps more vulnerable to this sort of exploitation. I imagine those little three year olds in about 10 years time, and pray that it doesn't happen to any of them, but fear that it may.

I was molested by my paternal grandfather once. It would have probably happened more but we lived a state away...didn't see him much. That one event was traumatic. Living through it on a daily basis I can't imagine.

December 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I can think of at least one instance where at least THE SPELLING on the "Happy Hollidays" cake would be spot on. One of my clients from my former job--Her last name was Holliday,spelled with the two L's--so it could be a cute advertising for her business.

Well, you know, it would be cute if the REST of it weren't so hideous...

December 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterVixenlyVenimous

@Regina, you obviously haven't read this blog very often.

December 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRosko

That last one is so passive-aggressive - particularly since the designs on the bulbs look like a pile of bones.. femurs unless i miss my guess. Thats if Roxanna isn't passed away already. If she is then its just tasteless.

December 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEvalis

Is it just me, or does the cake with the blue flowers look like its being served in an ash tray?

January 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Cake Wrecks is an all-time favorite blog-thing that I ever seen. CW can and prabably will drownd every other blog that I have read in chocolate-poo-like icing. All of those internet trolls can kiss my butt cos Cake Wrecks owns. I have never lol-ed harder in my LIFE. Me and my older sister love your work and would be delighted if you posted more cute and funny "Fail-Cakes" ( as I call them). For my 13th birthday,I want my cake to say " Nappy 13rd Beffday Elizabeth!"

-Elizabeth B,a very "Nappy" 12-year-old cake wrecks lover

P.S: I own my very own copy of your book.Its golden to me.

March 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth Brown

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