My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Kids These Days

"They just grow up so fast." [wiping away tear]

"I mean, first Holly was asking for thongs for her 8th birthday, and now her very own Playboy-themed party at 12. Wow. Can you believe it? I'm just proud.

[blowing nose] "I mean, every parent wants her little girl to grow up dreaming big dreams, padding her trainer bra, and looking to attract men as a means of personal validation, but to see it actually happening...[sniffle] I'm sorry, it's just a dream come true. Why, in another 6 years she could even be on The Girls Next Door - not that I want to get her hopes up too much, of course; there's no telling how much longer Heff's gonna be around, after all.

"I know, right? It IS unbelievable. You know, the Smiths over there made their Jenny wait until she was sixteen to have her playmate party. Isn't that awful?

"I mean, geez, how stifling can some parents get? Although, to be fair, I hear they had a great pole-dancing instructor come in for the girls. In fact, I need to get that number for Holly's party, if you'll excuse me..."

Now, Karen P. & Sarah G., remember to keep everything in perspective: these cakes still aren't as bad as this one.

UPDATE: Apparently the prosti-tot pole-dancing class includes an age-inappropriate audience. Check it out, and don't miss all the priceless expressions on the kids in the crowd!

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Reader Comments (180)

ugh. all i can think/hope is that the cake orderer said, "bunny cake," and this is what he/she got stuck with...but somehow, knowing how many parents these days think that they are their kids' "friends"...i somehow doubt i got it right.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEtiquette Bitch

I'm laughing too hard to even concoct a witty response. I wonder what those girls got for presents. Go-go boots and a pole?

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

Klasseigh. I can't imagine getting my daughter a cake like that. Wait. I have sense. That's why.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

Sadly, I could imagine some of my friends getting cakes like that. At 12. And that was 10 years ago.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKamity

I'm appalled by these cakes also (the underlying message, not the craftsmanship). However I now remember that somebody, I think the wholesome next door neighbor mom, gave me a "playboy bunny" tank top and shorts outfit for a birthday, probably 13th. A plain white tank top and moderately short navy shorts with the little playboy logo on the side somewhere. These garments weren't particularly outrageous, especially on my slouchy, doughy body. This was back in the 80's.

I think the Playboy brand has stretched the original meaning somewhat so it symbolizes a general sexiness, and not subservience to Hugh Hefner. Still I have to wonder what parents are thinking.

(Incidentally on the grand scale of things, Playboy is really not that bad. I mean I wouldn't put the brand on young girls, but really there's a lot of worse stuff out there now than busty Barbies posing in various positions.)

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

When parents set the bar low, it enables the kids to belly up. Or some apendages go up. Or something like that...

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjengersnap

well, kids do like fluffy bunnies....

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEagle Archambeault

Jeez. And I couldn't even wear makeup until I was 15.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermrs. q.

SO SO glad I have boys...

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDea

Aw, a Playboy cake for a 12 year old. How classy.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSara

Gag! :(

Yet, you can do everything right, insist on decent, modest clothing, try to foster healthy relationships & *still* the girl has a taste for trash. :(

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

i blame the Bratz dolls.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkara

Giggity, giggity, gi-ga-ty!

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDerelict

I was really hoping these were for Leap Year birthdays and the women were actually 48 and 72...Somehow I don't think I'm right.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJK_in_KC

Okaaaaaay? Wow that really is inapropriate. I admit I have a playboy purse but I'm in my 30's & I put it away in my closet since I now have a daughter who I'd like to grow up to have a job where she keeps her clothes on.

I guess the cakes were pretty well done though.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDani

Someone should call Child Protective Services. Certainly inappropriate birthdays cakes are a good enough reason to remove these girls from these stupid parents, right?

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterananda8star

Good heavens. I hope there is more to the story. please tell us that she asked for a bunny on her cake. Or than the party was for someone 21 not 12.

I love Cake Wrecks! And today's post was social commentary in disguise.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSally

That. Is. Priceless.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Blackout Blog

Well that explains a lot.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDorci Harris

yeah. that's just...not ok.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjen bryner

I must say this is the first post where I haven't seen the humor, and have been outright appalled by the comments.

It's a logo, and many girls think it is a 'cute' logo. I had a friend in school that loved the logo, and hated what it stood for, mostly because she had to explain to everyone that it was just a freaking design, and it didn't mean she was a whore.

There is a very, VERY large line between thinking a stylized design of a bunny is cute and being a street-walker.

You're all making out as if the only reason for liking that design would be if you wished to become a whore.

Go look around stores, the logo is on many things, and many of the people who buy them buy just for the logo, and detest the company itself.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTuldas

Good lord! Nothing like a playmate party at 16...whoopee! Now we must ask, did they have strippers too??

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterthezeninyou

"Uh, Child Protective Services? I have to make a report..."

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJustfrosting

Let me get this can't watch Bugs Bunny cartoons because they're deemed too violent, but we can wear a symbol of a concept that does nothing but objectify, demean and define women by their physical atributes. I guess violence is a pretty flexible term....

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Two of the seven signs of the Apocalypse ...

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterun-bride

Tuldas, yes it is just a "stylized design of a bunny" but it was created for and completely associated with a magazine known for it's nude photographs if women. And while I agree that simply liking the design does not make you a whore, I also think that a parent or even the bakery should step in and not allow a child’s cake to have such a well know ADULT logo on it. I have nothing against Playboy it’s self,… for adults. Clearly 12 is not adult. Even 16 isn’t adult enough.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMaryAnn

Sometimes, you have to make the sacrifice of not having the cute design because of the loaded message behind it.

Still so sad about not feeling like I can have my "flaming cross on a lawn" tattoo because of what people would think I meant--it's just so kewl, but then some people had to make it all racist and stuff...

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

Tuldas I feel the need to respond to you. I think this is one case where you simply can't divorce the logo from the brand. And if you have middle-school and high school aged children, as I do, (and as the ages on these cakes would suggest are for children in these demographics) I can GUARANTEE you that they don't think this is a "cute logo" and they know full well that it's a marketing symbol for an adult magazine. For fun one time my husband asked a girl on my older daughter's dance team, "Hey, what's up with the rabbit on your jacket" at which she rolled her eyes and said, "Duh it's Playboy. It's sexy." (she's 14 incidentally)
I'm not trying to demonize Playboy here, and I have to say I get a real kick out of the old ones my husband still has. I'm also not saying that appearing in it or reading it is in any way directly proportional to your level of "street-walkerishness".
What I am saying is this logo is universal enough that even young children will recognize what it is and when you hit the age where the hormones turn on (think 6th grade or younger) they aren't regarding it as a "cute bunny". Trust me.
I'm also saying I would, personally, prefer my daughters find other outlets for their self worth other than the need to be "sexy". If they want to do it when they're 18 then that's certainly their prerogative but until that time I don't think branding themselves with a Playboy logo sends an appropriate message.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLeslie

Tuldas -- its not just a cute bunny -- it is a symbol of a sexually oriented business. The bunny is inextricably linked to Playboy Enterprises. That is fine if an adult wants to participate or patronize the business but we are talking kids here. I suggest your friends find another bunny to wear if they don't want people to make the sexual connection. If you detest the company -- why buy items that the company profits from? Plenty of other bunnies out there that really are nothing more than cute little rabbits.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJean

For those of you that are offended by those of us that are offended by a 12yo getting a Playboy Bunny cake.. It is not that people think Playboy = whore. Women in playboy pose naked. NUDE. For Money. Nothing wrong with nudity. If you are an adult. I do not care how cute the logo is, it stands for Naked women that got paid for getting naked.

It isn't appropriate for a 12 or 16 year old girl. EVER.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngel

Those are just beyond ridiculous! What parent in their right mind would get those cakes?

And for Tuldas,it may just be a design, but it does have overtly sexual conotations, and is recognized around the world as a "sex" symbol. Hooters is just a restaurant, but if 10yo son asked to go there, I know it wouldn't be just for the burger and fries.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChar

Admittedly, my first reaction was "Oh, what a cute Miffy cake." My second reaction was "WTF? It's Sunday?" (since that is the Day o' Good Cakes. Then, I remembered that Miss Miffy does NOT wear a bow-tie. Heh.

What next? A Pussycat Doll Cake for a little girl's 1st birthday?

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCagey

What is with the.... after "Happy Birthday" in the first cake? Is Holly and afterthought?

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLisa


Some people shouldn't be procreating.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPam

These are hardly primm (my verification word). Seriously, just...ugh.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNYCGirl

Kamity's comment reminded me of the first year of middle school in the early eighties and a 6th grade classmate named Holly (one of the rich daddy girls)came dressed in a playboy bunny outfit for the Halloween costume event that took place in the gymnasium in front of all three grades.

She wasn't sent home or anything, but the next year, the costume thing was pretty much limited to temporary spray-on hair color, face glitter, and odd, but dress code abiding clothing.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

Never in a million years. I have no other words.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAce

Unlike most cake wrecks, these are well executed. I also subscribe via RSS to Failblog and for a second that's what I thought this was since it is more of a parenting fail than a cake designer fail.

I have daughters and I work with junior high and high school aged youth. Inappropriate clothing on people under 18 is my biggest pet peeve in life. Now it just gets extended to cakes.


February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This is what happens when parents try to be "friends" with their kids...

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I once read about a man who saw a girl wearing a t-shirt with the words "porn star" emblazoned on it. The girl and her mother were shopping for the girl's birthday party.

Her 9th birthday party.

The man was horrified. So am I.

And so am I by these cakes.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterScritzy

Wow - guess I shouldn't worry about the little mermaid theme being too sexual. what with the naked midsection and seashell boobies and all!

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commenter*~*Lis*~*

UHMMM...well, they ARE nice cakes.

The commentary rocks, tho! *Snorts coffee through nose*

WV: I almost had topope I was laughing so hard.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwolfmom

Why yes, Mr. Creepy pedophile neighbor, my 7 yo daughter *is* a sex object.


February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermammamolina

i hope it was carrot cake.

Holly was Hef's #1 ex-girlfriend, so that makes sense. Kind of.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSONGER

I agree with jmcleod76 - these aren't really cake wrecks so much as parenting wrecks. I watch The Girls Next Door, but I'm 40. The shocking thing is when the girls and Hef are out in public, and little bitty girls run up to them because they recognize them and are "huge fans". What kind of parent lets their daughters under 16 watch that show???

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Since I was ten everyone's been into Playboy D:. It's a label thing - Playboy stuff is ridiculously expensive and they like looking as though they have MEGA amounts of money. Ah, kids nowadays . . .

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPrincess In Training

it's sad but i know when i was in elementry school loads of my classmates would have loved to have these kind of cakes, the sad thing is that was only back in 1998. i'm in college now and it's very sad how many of the people alive today really shouldn't be procreating at all. and yes the playboy bunny is very closely associated with sex. i personally don't wish to associate it that way but it is and that isn't going to change anytime soon. i find no reason to buy their overpriced crap. although some of their stuff is cute looking but i don't like the associations and must get something else done.

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteryamiryu990

I can only hope that the first one was a misunderstood request for a bunny cake, and on the second the 16 stood for something other that age (it did just say "16th party", after all). But that might just be wishful thinking. I am only 13, around the age of these cakes' recipients, and I still think this is in bad taste (not to mention awkward to present to your friends!)

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

You reap what you sow...these parents are in for a real bumpy ride with those girls !!!

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLynn

Those are actually really lovely cakes. I particularly like the pink one. It's the fact that they're for pre-teen birthday parties that is so alarming. Ugh.

♥ xtine

February 25, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

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