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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jun052009

And Now, MORE Weird Wedding Cakes

Aw, you know you love it.

Monica G. thinks this cake from the Wilton website looks like it's covered with rocks. I, however, say it looks like a pottery project. Covered in rocks.

And here we have...

A fish tank.

In a wedding cake.

That is all.

(Thanks, Phyllis L.)

If that isn't fishy enough for you, though, there's always this option:

(Look closely.) I am amazed, Karin. Completely freaked out, but amazed.

(UPDATE: Nope, these aren't Koi fish. Or imitation crab meat. For a close-up and explanation, go here.)

Laura M. tells me this next one is a "new take on a croquembouche gone awry". Now, I have no idea what a "croquembouche" is, but from looking at the photo...

I'm going to guess it's French for "albino booby tower".

And lastly, let's take a "peep" at Courtney S.'s find:

Hm. Now why does this topper remind me of the final scene in Beetlejuice?

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Reader Comments (295)

ha - just noticed that it's already been posted by others! nevermind! :)

June 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I actually thought the shark cake was tampons (sorry!), I am so glad I clicked to read more.

June 14, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKitty

I say it's cans... Covered in rocks.

June 17, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

sorry but have too be a know it all ;):
Cake three is dead finless sharks.It was made as a CAMPAIGN against a shark fin soup traditionly served at chinese weddings.
ok know-it-all-ness is over!Cake 1 looks like somthing I made when I was in year 2!(got a B+!)

June 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"And now, Robin, would you like to share the vows you've written for Lark?”

“Lark, you’ve set my heart aflutter from the start. As we perch on the edge of our life together, I promise to love and cherish you forever. Today, I vow that you will never egret marrying me. Even when I have no heron my head, and can’t remember my own name, I will still love you. I am so glad that we’ll be each other’s peeps forever.”

June 23, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMs. Deckard

I say that it's some tin cans, covered in rocks.

July 29, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The shark cake ... it ... omg ... it looks ... it looks like ... I'm just gonna SAY it:
It looks like a pile of used sanitary towels OK!
guh-ross :P

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterbluegrasslass

I think the shark one looks like a pile of blood covered bandagages!

October 10, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Knife-a goes in, a-guts come out that's what Osaka Seafood Concern is all about."

December 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterOdd Etsy

At first glance, I honestly didn't think those "sharks" were fish. They look like bloody tampons. Yum.

December 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmber

the shark cake...umm im just going to say it .... looks like a bunch of tampons .... fin <---- haha "fin" okay im done ...

Melissa Klyce

December 1, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Out of those cakes, I like the one from the Wilton (I haven't tasted their fondant, but I read on the Web that it tastes grody to the max, as Valspeak has it for disgust-o!) website, the Truffle Tower cake, which looks like rocks!

Oh, and for the croquembouche, it's sooooo nekkid (LOL)!

December 3, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwhizkidforte

People, the mysterious cake is a pile of dead sharks. It was about awareness of the brutal killing of sharks for shark fin soup in China. At least, I think it was China... click on the link under the picture. It says. Plus it has a closeup where you can tell that they're sharks. I just thought I'd remind everyone, since it seems like a lot of people are asking about it in comments. :)

December 3, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShewholuvs2lol

Ok seriously can I just say two things?

First off, how many of you really think you need to google "Croquembouche" and post the definition like you're making some grand gesture and granting a tiny portion of your limitless knowledge to the poor ignorant readers of this site, when it's word-for-word the same definition that about 20 other people have posted the same way?

Secondly, there is a link to the picture of the shark (not fish, not tampon) cake that explains both the decorations and the purpose of the cake. Perhaps you could click on it and save your "omg gross what is that?!!one!eleven!1" response by educating yourself. Granted, it requires effort on your part, but I promise that learning something for yourself doesn't hurt. Godspeed.

December 4, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAndree La'Croix

Yep. I totally saw bloody tampons too. My word. Maybe they should've gone with GREY sharks. Not that I'm sure it'd have mattered.

December 7, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGWSTB

The first cake really gets me - not only it's so funny, but the Truffle Tower cake amazes me as a Wilton fan (save for the fondant, in which many of y'all are unimpressed tastewise should you have tasted it) - I have the yearbooks and will someday make a cake (wreck) by their methods! Thanks Wilton for having the Truffle (Rock) Tower Cake as my inspiration to be a cake decorator!

December 22, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterwhizkidforte

The peeps cake is AMAZING. I can only hope they did it specifically for humor- anyone who honestly thought that was a truly romantic gesture is nutty.

The dead shark cake is great, even before you realize it's not a real wedding cake but a political statement. So much detail! Damn!

January 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Sorry but I LOVE the Peeps wedding cake-what a concept..being a Peeps lover, who waits tos ee their luscious little lineup on the Easter candy counter every year, I totally get why this makes sense...
in a squishy, sugary sorta way!

March 25, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermizdarlin

The shark cake looks like a pile of used tampons! Could they not have at least tinted the sharks somewhat blue??? Did they have to all be STARK WHITE???

Ugh. *pukes in trash can*

March 25, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The "pile of bleeding fish" cake isn't fish at all. Click the link. They are sharks with their dorsal fins cut off. It wasn't a cake for a real wedding, but a statement cake to show how awful it is that sharks are slaughtered merely for their fins so they can make Shark Fin soup, which is traditionally served at weddings in China. :)

I'm gagging at the grooms cake with the open pond and real fish. :P

March 25, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPotsyinAZ

I thought the dead fish one looked like tampons. Wow........

May 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ooh, I actually own the Wilton Cakebook that has the decoration instructions for that first cake. So much chocolate. And yes, those are handmade truffles (although they're made using their patented candy melts, I think. I have the book, but it's not with me currently.)

It really does look like a pottery project, though, doesn't it? Never saw that before!

May 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWally

I think if you're a super Peeps fan the Peeps cake is kind of cute.

There is no way I would eat the fish tank cake for fear of yucky fish water contamination.

The shark cake is to make a statement for animal rights. I think it does a good job of that. It definitely catches your attention.

May 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLynette

I want to name a band Albino Booby Tower, as in, "Albino Booby Tower? I saw them at the Metro, they ROCKED!"

May 6, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I never would have guessed "sharks" for the white-and-red one. I was thinking more of "feminine hygiene products" :(

Granted, i couldn't think of a reason why someone would make a cake comprised of little tampons... but is it really more unreasonable than the true story?!

August 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersheila

Albino Booby Tower.

Classic!

Think I'll request one for MY birthday.
Better yet- My HUSBAND'S birthday!

August 25, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

I am totally weirded out by the dead fish cake. What is that?!?!? Are they really dead fish? How is that in any way appropriate? I don't get it. Very weird though! Definitely fits your site. =)

September 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTheCakeTop

The albino boobie cake looks like a cake ball cake to me. I used to work in a bakery that made them.

November 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterYvhv Hvtkē

I know this is an old post, but I stumbled upon it and just had to crack up at the PEEP Wedding cake! How hilarious is that?!!! :)

February 28, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMags

In regards to the croquembouche, Oh my but you must see Danielle Le Duc's work at his bakery www.douceurdefrance.com he is a classically trained chef and a wizard with baked goods!

February 28, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermariettamama

From a distance the shark cake looks like bloody bandages. Yuck.

March 14, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKathy W

I have to say, I never thought it was Koi - or any kind of fish. I thought it was a stack of used tampons - after looking at the close-up... I stand by my first opinion.

April 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAsh

It is good the dolfins are dead! They are EVIL! Evil rape creatures.Of DOOM! DOOM!!!

April 30, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterdragondraems

OH! I want the peep cake! :D

September 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ok, I hope I'm not alone, but all I see when I look at the shark cake is a tower of bloody tampons. Definitely NOT something I would eat.

October 11, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBrandi K

Oh My... the shark cake... I'm damaged now LMAO

October 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterWish-Art Cakes

The third one looks like tampons blueeggh

October 16, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRachael

These are too weird for words.. Although, the chocolate cake ( bizarre as it is) had me practically drooling. Me and my family are serious chocoaholics. ;)

October 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCake Lover

Is it horrible that I like the Peep Cake?!?! I'm a grown woman who can be satisfied with a package of chicks and bunnies, but I doubt any husband of mine would actually agree to a peep cake. And I do second the Beetlejuice bit!

November 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMaiyu

What bothers me is that the fish tank cake is lopsided...what if it tipped over? Guests would get a mouth full of guppie, that's what.

February 9, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMe, I, or just "them."

When I first looked at that there tower of dead sharks, I thought it was a bloody tampon cake. There is nothin on gods green earth more terrifying than that.

February 17, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGar

Thank goodness they're sharks - I couldn't get the image of Tampax out my head!

February 22, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAnon

TO MANY PEEPS!!!!! OMG!!! IT'S FREAKING ME OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHY DO THEY HAVE HUMAN BODIES???????????!!!!!!!!

July 30, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterChocogirl

OK, I have guffawed out loud several times at your wit and the appalling cakes I've come across here. But "albino booby tower" made me pee my pants. Not. Even. Kidding. I'm sending you the bill for having my couch cleaned.

September 10, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMandy

The peep cake made me laugh like crazy just now. Why? Somehow it just makes them look like giant chin people. Especially the groom. With his chin in the air. Oh dear :p. Need to stop!

November 5, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSteph C

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