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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Aug272009

Butterfly Misses

[singing] "There's two things I know for sure:

"These Wrecks number seven..." (okay, six)

"And they'll make you want to hurl!"

Sorry for inflicting you with that song. Heh. Ok, now let's see how else bakeries destroy the seemingly simple butterfly, shall we?

First, every Wreckerator knows you have to make butterflies out of cupcakes. Otherwise, you run the risk of them looking like...well, butterflies.

And we can't have that, now, can we?

But malformed, lumpy wings just aren't enough. Sometimes a wacky mustache is needed:

"Oui oui, I believe I have, how you say, wee wee'd mehself! Hon hon hon!"

Or maybe a turd-errific, camo-riddled model:

Uh, guys? Exactly which demographic are you going for here? I mean, I don't think little boys are wild about butterflies, and little girls don't usually like camo OR poop.

Luckily, though, some butterflies still get a happy ending.



Charlotte F., Raven, Rachael, Rebecca R., Jessica A., & Bijan P., stop looking at me like that; I was merely referring to his smiley face. Really.

- Related Wreckage: It's a Wreck Off!

« As You Wish | Main | 9 Out of 10 Child Psychologists Agree: »

Reader Comments (174)

in my opinion butterflies are hard enough on real cakes. why would you try to put a ccc to work on one too?
yes, of course, i giggled at the Peter-fly.
And the double ended turtle - I see it, Kristina!

Oh man. Jen 2984472034343, CCC 0.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterthe flour child

Its kind of like when you go back and watch the old Disney movies...the ones on VHS... and you are finally old enough to catch the innuendos and not so pc comments you missed when you were a kid...it ruins it for you. Like penis butterflies...I can never look at a butterfly the same way again!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKate

Anyone want to start guessing how many people are going to comment on what the last one looks like even though it's implied clearly in the post?

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTaylor

Ha ha! If it weren't for the whole CCC thing, I think the last one is actually kind of cute!

...

...OK, AND the fact that it's a penis with wings! I was just trying to avoid the elephant in the room!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLaurenH

I think the first wreck is actually two bats hiding under a snake. It all makes sense that way.

Sorta.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShinnewn

And here I thought the 5th one was a slug crawling over some turtle roadkill.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Can I ask the seemingly ignored question here: Why would one want a cake to look like a BUG to begin with? The failures abound!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJingle

That green one looks like Luigi got turned into a butterfly ... vaguely ...

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKamity

Yeah, the last one...super cute wings, but that's a tish more phallic than I like my butterfly torsos. But, you know, I'm sure there are butterfly-themed bachelorette parties that would kill for that CCC.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterApril

Why don't CCC makers just skip the pretense and leave the cake out altogether? I know plenty of people (me among them) that have naughty fantasies about buying and eating wads of frosting.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDiana

I really thought you were talking about the smiling face on the last one, "happy ending" until I took a better look! ROFLMAO! Too funny!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMiss B

Ug - who decided that butterflies had to be made from CCCs?

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJeff

"Happy Ending" made me spit coffee on my computer monitor. Well Done Cake Wrecks!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHippy Goodwife

I look at cakewrecks with my 3 year old. He's quite the little decorator, better than some of these supposed professionals at least. Anyway, he insisted that none of these are actually butterflies and when he looked at the last one he said "oh my god mummy, it's a happy smiling penis!" So yeah, it's not just you...

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterrhonda

Oh. My. Truly wrecktastic. On many levels.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

At first I thought the last CCC was actually quite well done, then I read the comments and took a second look. Oh my goodness! It's Mr. Happy!
Blogless Mary Lou
WV: recreo: Some cake decorators unsuccessfully try to recreo nature.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBlogless Mary Lou

i used to turn the radio off every time i'd hear that damn song, for reasons only an extremely sentimental mother would understand.

i think it's cruel to write lyrics that are so obviously meant to yank your heart out of your chest, chop it up into tiny pieces and then make a butterfly cakewreck out of it. hmmmmph.

ironic though, that the song includes these lyrics:

Walk beside the pony, Daddy, it's my first ride.

I know the cake looks funny, Daddy, but I sure tried.

i don't think daddy would like his little girl to be eating that last butterfly cake, eh?

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTerry Lee

My daughter took one look at the camo butterfly and said, "AGGH, a booger monster!!!" LMAO!!!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKelli

WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA!!!

Those are like butterflies that have been stepped on, or smushed on a windshield!

Penis Butterfly is funny as crap. It's like a vibrator laying on some crumpled pink fabric. lol

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMiranda

Ohhh, that last one is just wonderful! I laughed so loud I startled the cat. *happy sigh* Flying phalluses, what will they think of next...

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterbonni

I need a new monitor after reading and seeing "Happy Ending"! LMAO! Thanks for the laugh!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is it just me or does the last one look like a penis with wings? A smiling one at that.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBunneh

Yes the last one IS decent and much better looking. I have a butterfly shaped cake pan, I need to try it one of these days. :p

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGoof

That is the happiest penis I have ever seen!!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRebekah

The first one is hideous, I would not eat it. The bugs on the second one look like slugs, not butterflies.

WV: yecudi

Yecudi get me to eat any of them.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChris, Gina and Hunter

There are just no words... except that the last one is really so very, very wrong. (Personally, I'd be screaming - not smiling - if a penis I knew sprouted wings.)

WV - astabion - The Wreckreator of that last cake astabion some kind of illegal drug.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

Guess I'm not in the mood. Most of the time I'm seeing malformed mosquitoes with the exception of the green moldy sponge.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

Wow. Poor Delancey (cool name, bad cake!). Luckily she probably won't remember her 1st birthday otherwise butterflies would scare her the rest of her life.

The rest...meep. D=

I thought the last one was so pretty! Lovely job on the wings, cute face...and then...BWAHAHAHAHAH!!!

Oh, heavens. Wreck on!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

Okay, that 5th one looks like a slug crawling across a flattened frog! Good lord. When my kids were little, we'd sometimes order plain cakes for their birthdays because we didn't have time to bake them. Then we'd decorate them ourselves because we didn't trust the bakery with whatever weird pokemon or nintendo character or animal our kids were into at the time. Now I see we made the right choice!!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is the last cake suppose to represent a young boys transition into becoming a man?

Or is it...
"Is that a butterfly cake or are you just happy to see me?"

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara_in_WA

Ow..I have a headache and these just made it worse! (looking for Aspirin)

LOL

Amy B

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

what's with that second cake? The cock roach butterflies? "umm hi, we're Roach-butterly-AMERICANS thankyouverymuch!"

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterpeewee

I love that half of the comments are ripping on you for making fun of the happy ending butterfly... and the other half are rolling on the floor laughing!! ha ha!! IT LOOKS LIKE A PENIS PEOPLE!!! don't believe me... scroll up look again... yup... hahaha

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNettie

Ugh! that one looks like big black flies w/ pink and red wings over it. at least the flies like it!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commentercewmont

I used to decorate cakes in a bakery and I HATED it when people ordered a butterfly CCC. I tried to persuade them in other directions, but some simply would not be moved. It is quite difficult to get a decent butterfly. Or anything, for that matter. I hated those stupid things! (Can't say as I ever quite achieved the wreckage posted today, however. Wow)

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That's not a penis, it's Epcot.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I keep hoping that the flying penis cake is for a stripper who wears butterfly wings, not for a little girl's birthday party.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMeg

Clearly butterfly number six started his day with a Red Bull.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi

Come on, that flying penis cake wasn't a wreck it was CUTE!!...wait, um is was a butterfly...neeeeevermind.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjess

Happy ending. Bwahahahaha!!!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHorribleLicensePlates

To the last wrecker....hey there big boy....is that a butterfly in your bakery? or are you just happy to see me? ooo la la

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCake Believe

I had to get a few comments in before I got the Happy Ending one - I was too mesmerized by the upside down hearts.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commenter*~*Lis*~*

LOL at the last one. Reminds me of the book Small Gods, in which the Great God Om tries to curse someone by saying something along the lines of "May your genitals sprout wings and fly away!" Looks like he succeeded this time.

Word verification = "triumbe". I'm sure the bakers thought these cakes were a triumbe of art, but we don't.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is it just me, or does that last one look like a.......

Well, you KNOW what I'm going to say.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShannon

who needs viagra when there's pink butterfly wings?

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Personally, I LOVE the moustache! The center of that butterfly is absolutely adorable-the wings just need work!

Except for the circumcised body on that last one, it was adorable!

http://mybuttberipebiteme.blogspot.com/

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMyButtBeRipeBiteMe

You should have said "wonky mustache" because when you say wonky anything it just cracks me up. I have no idea why, but that just does it for me!

And I think the last one is sort of pretty. A little lopsided, but pretty!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTara

Okay, nevermind. I missed the body of the last butterfly. His wings sure are pretty, though!

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTara

OMG. The only way the last one could be any more hilarious would be if they gave it white "antennae" on top of it's happy smiling head.

The camo/poop butterfly/turtle looks like a magnified a germ cell.

captcha: entesch - These decorators aren't entesch with reality.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdenestria

It took me a good minute to even notice the wings on the black blobs...I was too confused as to why someone thought formless clumps of shiny black icing would ever be a good idea for anything except just that.

August 27, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKathrine

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