My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Multiple Choice Wrecks

The great thing about modern art is that the subject matter is often left open to interpretation. So for these cakey specimens, I figured I'd give you a few options:

a) a hairy alien hand, complete with '33' tattoo
b) minnows attacking a log in a mud puddle
c) a cactus, to show how "cuddly" Mandy is

a) a post-modern pear
b) My 2nd-grade art project
c) an African "beer basket"

a) a diagram of a frog's reproductive system
b) a wishbone jumping rope
c) a T-bone steak

(Ok, that one was too easy; the inscription gave it away.)

a) salt and pepper shakers
b) dumbbells in front of a giant graffiti-ed pickle
c) a skateboard

a) a gladiator sandal with extra arch support
b) Something the under-14 set really shouldn't be looking at
c) a corset? Er, I mean, a corset. Yeah.

Matthias, Anony, Teresa, Angela M., & Sydney W., here's a hint: The answer is always "c".

- Related Wreckage: Dastardly Dad Designs

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Reader Comments (113)

um, translations on the inscriptions, please? "Hip Heom" on CW1? On the last CW: "Love [unreadable] Mrs."???

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEtiquette Bitch

Have I been out of the skating scene too long? When I was a kid, skateboards were flat!

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStacey

@ Michelle S:

Oooooh, a drunken Pictionary party using cake and frosting. Caketionary.
I wanna play.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEm

ok.. that first one? I *really* thought it was one of those rabiit thingies... you know - like the one Samantha uses on Sex and the City? oh sorry? is that a Family rated blog?

but seriously... look at it again... well.. except for the pricklies....

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarieA

OMG! OMG! "Wishbone jumping rope!!!".....OMG....TOO.....FUNNY!!!!

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterolson

How do all of you know what an IUD in a uterus looks like?? This is not an image currently resident in my brain, and unless you've all been teaching Health class and/or dissecting humans, I'm curious to know where one might pick up this info.

As for the cakes: that skateboard would SO not roll. It's got fluffy wheels, for heaven's sake. Fluffy objects, with the possible exception of my younger cat, do NOT roll.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGladys

The first one looks like a used hair waxing strip. Nads, anyone?

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda in Austin

The T-bone looks just like the model of the Mirena IUD in a uterus that my O.B. has in his office.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm gasping for air about the last one...14 and under...hahahaha!
I totally see something you could buy at a passion party in those!

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChrista

Actually, I thought the second one was an overdressed pineapple.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRaethe

The first one is clearly *tadpoles* attacking a long, not minnows.

I also thought the T-bone looked like a map of some sort.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRed Wolf

^^The person who made the African Beer Basket also apparently thinks that The Little Mermaid has explosive diarrhoea. Scroll down a bit.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJael

Funny Stuff! I like the new look of your site!

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThrifty and Healthy

That last cake looks like it says "Mrs. Lowe", not Mrs. Love.

However, I don't get why the corseted torso is covered with moss.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTed S. (Just a Cineast)

When I saw the first cake, I first thought "Hellraiser"... but then I saw the 33 and figured "ok, Rolling Rock?"
But then, you add the (apparently) Dutch inscription, and it's a multicultural cake - cactus, beer, and a Dutch cheer!

Oh, and I think I see a new trend starting: first there were pregnancy cakes, now there are birth control cakes! "Congrats on your IUD!"

WV: clogr - someone who fills Cakewrecks (or other awesome blogs) with meaningless drivel

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDimndgal1

@Gladys I know because every GYN I've EVER been to has one of those little insurance company distributed models to show you what your IUD will look like in your uterus.
And really there's not much else exciting to do in a gynecologist's office besides look at the plastic models and posters.
They look at you funny if they come in and you've already got your feet in the stirrups and you're yelling "YEEEEHAW".

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLeslie

I could've sworn #2 was a Cosby sweater/gourd.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNate

Wow. I think I got all of them except Adam and Abbies. Untill I read the comments. Really a skateboard? Hmmm. Even though I know it was a T-bone I think it really did look like a wishbone jumping rope.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

I'm really surprised I'm the first one to mention this but, the first one is a cactus and a hand. That's because it's the Cactuars' hand, the cactus monster from the Final Fantasy franchise.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersailordada_99

Mandy's cake with the "Xiy Xoun" is actually saying "Hiep Hoera". It's Dutch and it's the same as saying "hip-hip-hooray".

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Uh, did somebody take a bite out of T-Bone's cake?

The beer basket is kind of awesome actually.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJerry

And here I was all excited because I thought I'd get to be the first person saying the steak looks like an IUD. You guys are good!

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAlisa Knits!

Leslie -
I now have a new object in going to the gynecologist. Thank you.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterval

I totally thought that second one was a uterus.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterpeewee


September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLucia

that second one DOES look exactly like i remember a glazed pot i made in art when i was about ten years old...

in other news, i'm very excited because i just got an email from amazon saying they can now predict when my wrecky book will be delivered!!!

wreck on, everybody!

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterfangfluffy

So does no one else think number two looks like a penguin? An argyle-patterned penguin, that is.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That t-bone one looks like an IUD. Mmmm, cake anyone?!

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMommy.Mary

Re: African beer baskets. As someone raised in Africa, there are two versions of these (in the non-cakewreck world!) The cake here is shaped very much like a beer gourd, used very effectively to store home-made beer. Gourds are often beautifully decorated with geometric patterns, which have been wreckplicated here. A beer basket is a very finely woven basket, often somewhat gourd-shaped. No it is not watertight, you pour homemade beer (very cloudy, lots of suspended particles from the grain used) into the basket with a pot below, the fine weave of the basket filters the beer into a more drinkable form.


September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Looking at the maker of the beer basket cake's website, it's disorienting. Some of the cakes look lovely (especially Strawberry Shortcake's house! Wow!), but so many of them look awful (Little Mermaid sitting on a pile of... rock.... shiny, brown, dripping...rock). And the baker inevitably makes cartoon character's faces look furry. Fascinating...

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngela

Ok, so I'm pretty sure that the skateboard cake is another example of parents subconsciously displaying favoritism for one of their children! Adam's part of the skateboard is 2/3 of the bottom and the entire "top" of the cake! All poor Abbie got was the left half of the bottom...and the number 3. Who got the number 1 you ask? Oh ya, the favorite child... Adam!

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCourtney C.

I liked the post-modern pear better than the basket!

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLauren

My brain hurts.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNatalie

Okay, the second one looks like Mrs. Butterworth in a harlequin skirt. And I'm really, really glad Number 3 didn't fill in the steak with that red gel stuff.

WV: natoll - a newborn coral island

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGaylon

I love the argyle pear. That one definitely merits wreck-plicating.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered Commenteranaceofkidneys

hah! im part of the under-14 set.
I think the second one looks like a large pear in a quilt. and the skateboard one could be two teddy bears facing a humongous watermelon.
The third one looks brain for something that looks even remotely like the design) nope, doesn't look like anything. But if I had to choose, I'd say A.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChocolatier

I'm glad you said the Adam & Abbie cake was a skateboard, because my first thought was two Daleks sitting in front of a spaceship console.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBree

Terry Lee said it first . . . T-Bone looks like an IUD/uterus! I couldn't figure out the salt shaker one, but skateboard sounds right to me! Also, the "beer basket" looks like a northwestern Chinese vase from Gansu Province (where I live, which is why I normally get to read Cake Wrecks before anyone else . . . it's my evening when it is posted in the States!)

Poor Mandy . . . I think her inscription is some ancient, unrecognizable language.

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterVickie

First cake: I LOVE the handwriting used to write 'Mandy', but I still can't figure out what the other two words are.

Last Cake: Future Mrs. Love? Future Mrs. Lowe?

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSixxlet

Jen, I think you're too polite to say it (did I just say that?!), but the first one looks like a social disease...eeeeewwww...

September 8, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBobbi

As a Mandy, I am thoroughly perturbed by the first cake, especially since my next birthday will be my 33rd. o_O

The 3rd cake (T-bone?) looks like an IUD to me!

Love the new layout, Jen!

WV: inishlo ~ what to drink while viewing these wrecks

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMandy

For the last one, Christa may have it with "passion party" -- maybe it was a lingerie shower for the future Mrs. Lowe. Poor Mr. Lowe.

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterthisbagisnotatoy

That last one reminds me of the monster in the bugs bunny cartoons, except the monster was red as I recall.

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLeah McNally

For the first one I'm going to go with d) a vibrator

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterArwen

I was thinking the t-bone steak looked like an IUD.

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTara

For the 2nd-to-last one, does anyone else see two complementary hotel towels placed in front of a truly horrible bathroom countertop/sink?????? No?

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I was only surprised that there was a right answer for the African beer basket cake.

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGentlyFeral

OH WOW. so amazing... !!!!!

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterlyndsay

The Incredible Hulk called.
Wants the last cake back.

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Nah, that "T-Bone" one is definitely an IUD jumping rope.

September 9, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDanielle

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