My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Star Wars: The Next Generation

Remember Katie, the little girl with the Star Wars water bottle who's been unofficially adopted by every geek on the Internet? Well, in Katie's honor, tomorrow is Wear and Share Star Wars Day!

This is a day to rock your Star Wars clothing or accessories, and also to donate a Star Wars or other geeky toy to your local shelter or hospital. Cool, right?

Now, for this special occasion Jen has asked me, Number 1, to write a Star Wars themed post. What Jen doesn't realize (and what I'm not going to tell her), is that I've never seen Star Wars. Ever. But I've seen Spaceballs a whole bunch of times, so I figure this'll be no biggie.

Ok, so, the movie is set in space, "the final frontier", sometime in the future. Luke Skywalter is the pilot for the Star Ship Firefly.


("Oh I'm sorry, we don't make Star Wars cakes at this bakery, but we'll happily make you one with plenty of 'space'." [Yeah. Seriously.])



Skywalter has to save the beautiful Princess Leia from the evil grip of Dark Vader and his Terminators:

"We will destroy Hans Solo by playing checkers."



In order to get past all of the Cylons, Skywalter makes some friends with magical powers:

RD2D, CP3O, and Spider-Man.



RD2D, CP3O, and Spider-Man follow Luke to the planet Vogon. There they find a short psychic Muppet in a swamp:




Slimer tells Luke to "use the force," but Luke doesn't know what that means so he shoots him. (First.) Luke and his gang then go back to the Enterprise to fight Dark Vader and rescue Princess Leia. Again.



But the ship is now underwater, which makes it impossible to turn on their Life Savers.

Dark Vader thinks it's unfair that Luke brought friends to help him fight, so Vader calls a friend of his own:



Accio pixie power!!


But wait! Slimer pops up from the dead and casts lightning into Vader's helmet. Pew! Pew!Vader falls to the ocean floor, and Slimer says, "You killed my father; prepare to die!" Then he crosses the tachyon streams to open a wormhole which sends Vader back to Gozer.


Then Luke, Slimer, CP30, RD2D, Scully, Mulder, and Superman all run to rescue the beautiful Princess Leia a third time, and she proclaims her love for Luke:

And they all live together on the island until John Locke finds himself dead in the coffin.




Thanks, Amanda K., Anony M., Autumn P., Amanda N., Sarah, Jessica H., Ruth K., and Mattie T. And as the brown coats say, "Live long, and may the force be with you." So say we all.


UPDATE from Jen:
Don't miss today's CNN article on Katie, with quotes from yours truly!

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Reader Comments (232)

To the Cake Wrecks crew - you guys are awesome! To Katie - that hat is awesome! I just might have to figure out how to knit one now.

This is HYSTERICAL! Love the tink-vader alliance! While I couldn't wear Star Wars to work today I'm going to rock it like it's no one's business tomorrow! (And go looking for a water bottle with Luke and Yoda!)

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterafrancis

Primarily posting because my wv is "holodica". Isn't that where Darth Vader and Tinkerbell hold their fight simulation training? The holodica on board the Firefly D?

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShanti

the cakes were funny - but the text... priceless :) love it!!!

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterT

Oh dear... I keep saying that I'm not into sci fi, and was proud of my successfully avoiding Star Wars until several friends conspired to inflict 3 episodes on me some few years back. The sad thing? I got far too many of the references to be able to keep claiming that! I really am far more of a geek than I realized-- but that's probably because of the friends to whom I'm comparing myself.

That was one very funny post!!

PS If you truly haven't seen Star Wars yet, then don't give in-- what was once innovative is now beyond dated, so you can't get past the cheesiness of the special effects, the lame acting and plot. Think of how something like Lost is going to seem 30 years down the road, to the next generation. It's a real let-down. You had to see it when it was still new and fabulous. Instead, indulge in all the wonderful things that are it's legacy.

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

Love Katie's Leia hat :)

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

Is it just my bifocals playing tricks? seriously...Luke Skywalter?? really...have no interest in reading all 200 comments but did no one else catch that?

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wow... just, wow...

That was so full of Geek, I'm speechless.

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

Hey Anonymous,

The whole point of the post is that Number 2 got all the geek references deliberately wrong.

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKalani

This may be my all-time favorite post simply because of the sheer amount of geek!

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAimee

Now THAT was funny. Thank you John :)

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClaire in CO

This is my contribution to Katie and Wear and Share Star Wars day:

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGretch Valencic

I. Want. Katie's. Cap!

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBuffy

WHERE CAN I GET KATIE'S HAT?!? Oh, and great post! RD2D. bwah ha ha!!

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTwilightTwins2

While not the best well cake I've seen...(ha!)
Any girl who wants both Tinkerbell and Darth Vader on her birthday cake sounds pretty cool. :D

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLD

Great post!
Even better than Jim Halpert on The Office explaining Battlestar Galactica.
"It's about this guy, Dumbledore Calrissian, who's got to take The Ring back to Mordor."

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterVicki

Simply stated, I love CW (and Epbot, of course, since i'm handing out blog love). Today's post was absolutely outstanding. I loved every line, and was very happy w/the multiple tie-ins...and ending w/John Locke in the coffin, I snorted, out loud, slightly embarassing but true. Thank you for making my day, LOVE!

December 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMCR

Best. Post. Ever.

December 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrista

HA! That's awesome!

December 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClassroom of Jamie Jay

OMG so many geek references, so little time!! LOVE your blog, lady!!!

December 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSweetCelebrations.US

When I saw the first cake, I absolutely believed it was Howard Cosell, famous sporscaster. I couldn't imagine why someone would want him on a cake. See his photo on Wikipedia.

December 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I laughed so hard I cried! LOL that was an epic and amazingly awesome story. And I miss LOST.

December 12, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

Am I the only who noticed it's supposed to be R2D@ instead of RD2D?

December 12, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous


December 12, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterpnclaura

Even though 200 people already said it, let me also say that this post rocked with awesome!

December 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

I love this blog so much!! I do have to point something out that was bugging me though, it's R2D2, not RD2D.

December 20, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

this was just awesome reading, thanks for today's cheering-up!

December 30, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

By the way it's R2D2 not RD2D... And Darth Vader is chilling with spiderman too. Love your blog!!!

January 20, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This is my favorite post ever!

April 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The vogon planet is actually called vogsphere.

June 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh wow! My two favorite things on ONE cake. Tinkerbell and Star Wars. That is epic.

December 17, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjedigirl77

With every sentence I read I was going "Ow, ouch, ooo, that hurts...OW!" But hysterical when you know all the references!

"Use the force, Harry."-Patrick Stewart

April 28, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSashaBohon

Can you do a Firefly cakes post?

February 13, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSomebody Awesome

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