My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Conditions Froggy

I know a lot of people like frogs. Heck, even I think the bright green fella who hangs out on my front door is adorable. (Until he starts jumping in my direction, of course. Then he turns into a slimy hell beast who leaves me no choice but to climb shrieking onto John's shoulders to escape the "hop zone.")

Still, I don't really get the whole frog cake thing. Other than my front door buddy, the only other close encounter I've had with a frog was in 7th grade biology, and that one smelled anything but appetizing.

You could argue, and rightly so, that cakes in the shapes of animals are nothing new, so why am I picking on frog cakes?

Well, geez, man, just look at this thing:

He's mean, green, shaped like a tureen, and lookin' mighty PO'd about his toe issues.

(In his defense, those are some serious toe issues. Ouch.)

How's this for a scrumptious specimen?

Wow. PETA could use this guy in an anti-frog legs campaign. How could you possibly cut into that poor, terrified visage? Leave him and his splatted fly tongue alone, you heartless cake murderer!

At least this guy looks happy:

I'm guessing he's proud as punch of that funny little limb beard. Or has his chin sprung a leak?

Here's a sultry little number in honor of Valentine's Day:

This amorous amphibian is ready for romance!
And maybe some Visine, since her eyeballs appear to be on fire.

Also for Valentine's, here's a princely gem:

Or should I say princely jewels? (HEYO!!)

Bakers, seriously, I'm all for maximizing your cookie cutter designs, but using that cutter for frogs is, frankly, quite a leap.

Alden M., Casie G., Sharon P., Lauren M., Vanessa H., & Lynelle R., you think it's cold in that display case? Just wondering.

- Related Wreckage: So What Happens If You EAT the Frog?

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Reader Comments (123)

The Valentine frog might have flaming eyeballs, but she also has a killer manicure!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermorriganscrow

@John (the hubby of Jen), well, if she wrote this almost a year ago, then of course it sounds different, because she's probably gotten about 50 times better than she used to be ;) I still really enjoyed the post, though.

These frogs are both ugly and hilarious! "Limb beard" LOL. #3 looks like a toad with those red pimples, and those eyes are nothing short of demonic. It looks like something that would crawl out from under your bed. *shiver*

Of course, I'm a froggy lover, too, so I'm with others about wanting froggy Sunday Sweets :D Because these cakes are just terrible . . .

Oh! By the way, this blog has inspired me to take up cake decorating. We'll see how it goes, if I create wonderful cakes or . . . wrecks D:>

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterstormcloud

not a frog lover, but even if i were, these wrecks are toadly gross to look at!

and so many of them! we're practically knee-deep in frog cakes.

makes me wanna croak.

which reminds me, the other day i asked the waiter if he had frog legs. he said, "no! i always walk this way!"" rel="nofollow">ba-dum-ching

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTerry Lee

"And maybe some Visine, since her eyeballs appear to be on fire."

Oh man. Thankfully I wasn't drinking anything or my monitor would have gotten a bath.

'Frog' cookies: Oh, dear. 0_0

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

The second one looks like an original Star Trek tv show alien. And Miranda, the dong cutters are wrinkly because dongs are wrinkly in general! Or else it's just been a reeeeallllyyy long time for me.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLorraine

I can't get enough of this blog! The frogs are just hilarious and the cookies at the end looked more like teddy bears than frogs. I liked your spin better though!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterka.middleton

I'm going to disagree with Lois. Very Jen, very hilarious.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChelsea

Oh, these are hilarious!! That horny toad did me in. Super commentary, Jen!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

The one with the legs sprouting out of his chins looks like a result of a nuclear disaster. Kind of like Blinky the fish from the Simpsons.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSiriusSchwartz

Some real flies gently resting on the icing would be all these cakes need to achieve perfection!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Shitty Astrologer

Ha! When those wrinkly, sweet little ol' bosomy frogs want to feed you cookies, hop to it or you'll miss out. Then for your birthday, they'll croak-chet you a new sweater...

I think I'm just missing my grandmother today. And she wasn't even iced in green or anything. :D

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

i like the pearls decorating the "frog" cookies.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I just have to wonder which part of those cookie frogs you would eat first, and would people judge you depending on where you started snacking?

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdeemack

That second cake looks kind of like a green Birdo from Super Mario 2:

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Yay, Froggie-peens! Thanks... I really, really needed a laugh today, and you've supplied it!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnn

OMG! The last picture is HORRIBLE! talk about phallic shapes there!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChristina

Looks like something bert made in an episode of trapdoor.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The second frog looks like a toilet I once refused to use in Prague.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBitchin' Fixin's

Someday my prince will... um er, nevermind;) Yeah that last one's a bit of a stretch LOL

These wreckers seem to have one SERIOUS hatred for frogs!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCulinarychiq


February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

My two year old just pointed at the cakes and yelled, "Monster!"

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTaiPod

I wish i had a photo for you; my mother made a frog cake for my ninth birthday which -through cunning use of cocktail sticks- could actually open and close it's mouth. It was amazing!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterelspeth

Your second "frog" looks strangely like a potty training stand-alone toilet. Even the shape of its tongue...wait.. frogs eat corn? ...eww.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTyler

They could at least saved the last set by making the bottom a lily pad. Definitely much less noticeable than large frog danglers!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCinammonSwirl

OK, this is probably close to what the frog cookies were supposed to be:

Unfortunately, the decorator has no idea what a frog looks like.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm not scared of frogs but I really hate cane toads, poisonous little brutes that they are, and will scream and try to get out of their hop zone. The Valentine frog cake scares the jimminy jillikers out of me though. I rather like the third one though. And seriously, are the last ones with their giant bums made from wrinkly dongs? It's still terribly unclear what those cookie cutters are actually meant to be.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWolvie Girl

The first cake reminds me of one of the covers to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy novel!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrillian

I am SERIOUSLY confused. On so many levels.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarji

The first one looks what would happen if Oscar the Grouch mutilated himself trying to get out of his trash can.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBree

The first cake needs the following caption: "I shall destroy you utterly, koax, koax."

No one will understand this comment. That makes unreasonably happy.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNick

Is it just me or did the second one seem to look an awful lot like "Poo-dolph" from one of the Christmas wreck posts? The same baker at it again, perhaps?

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAshley

I believe at least two of those (#1 and #3) are Oscar the Grouch cakes.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

THese are scary, but i do love Kermit..maybe a sunday sweet of Kermits? please...

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarieFrance

The second one looks like a cross between an ashtray and a toilet. With eyes. I have never understood why anyone thinks frogs are cute, and these certainly reinforce that!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKate

I really don't want to eat a cake of an animal that eats flies.

This also kind of reminds me of those mutant frogs from MN in the 1990s...

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFanboy Wife

That second one looked like Mike Wazowski, only with two eyes.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBuffy

Congrats Jen & John on Cake Wrecks being mentioned on today! That should bring a lot more folks here to visit! Here's the link:

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDiane1611

I just found your blog and am laughing so much at the mistakes and ugly cakes.

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChristina

Here in South Australia frog cakes are a state icon - made by the bakery chain Balfours.
They look like this:
They're sickly sweet because they're sponge cake with fondant on the outside and topped with cream, but they'll never die out because they're so South Australian!

February 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLauren

I'm disappointed that no-one sent an image of Balfours Frog Cakes from South Australia. They look nothing like frogs, but they've been around so long over here they're practically a legend.

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRiver

i thought the 1st one was from Monsters, Inc.

I happen to love frogs :) Even had a pixy frog as a pet until it died in a house fire. Just cute and green and hoppy! what's not to love? Any chance of Sunday Sweets focusing on animals?
wv: Prerl. Sort of like pearl but less intuitive.

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

my friends once bought me a brilliant frog cake for my birthday, it wasn't scary or disturbing like these at all. sadly my house had an ant infestation at the time and they got to it before we did! :(

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLindsay

#1 looks like the monsters from Ghostbusters.

#2 - like a toilet

#3 - the NOT THE MAMA dinosaur guy

#4 - like a lizard

#5 - like a bunch of frog penis's with attached testicles (how DO you spell the word for more than one penis??)


February 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWonderful World of Weiners

LOL, those sad looking frogs didn't know what was comin' when the baker decided to be creative. And the cookie frogs! HAHAHA! Couldn't help but want to laugh REALLY hard. Although they were kinda cute, still very wrong.

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteraudraj06

Note to baker/decorator on last item - could you not tell what that shape was? How could you not know...unless you've never seen one I suppose :o(

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersleeplessnights04

The tongue on the second one looks like a condom

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJJ

Not frogs or peens,
but LOBSTER cookie cutters! Imagine them red, with the face in the middle of the the "balls". I am from Maine.

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElise

Guesses from my 5yr old: 1st a monster, 2nd a frog, 3rd a balloon, 4th a frog cake, 5th he didn't know at first then thought a moment and said girl frogs.

I'm kind of surprised he listed any of them as frogs.

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I honestly thought that the first one was supposed to be a cabbage with feet.

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterpennfana

At first glance I thought the top one was going to be an Oscar the Grouch cake!

February 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterQueenKatofTypos

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