My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Tell Me What You Want, What You Really Really Want

Sometimes when a cake makes no sense, it's helpful to ask yourself, "What do you suppose the customer asked for?"

Insults 101: When calling a girl a dog, it's always helpful to be breed-specific.

(For what it's worth, I'm pretty sure that's not how Mrs. Hopperband spells her name.)

"Look, I just want what every girl wants for her birthday: a big- a$$ cake!"

Eh. [shrugging] As I'm sure every cake-loving girl would agree: close enough. Pass the forks!

Sometimes you just want a sugary baked good for no reason at all. And yet, without an inscription, what can Wreckerators wreck? That's why they're so adamant that your cake say something.

And that's also why we get Wrecks like these:

Give it a minute.

Jen B., Stephanie W., Autumn R., & Sara G., one "Ho Thing Special," comin' up.

- Related Wreckage: Dial-A-Wreck

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Reader Comments (87)

I love the Big Ass Cake, I'd consider asking for that for my birthday.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Black Dog

The big arse lettering on the big a&* cake is actually quite well-done!

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCarynne




*throws all dollies out of pram and sulks*

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the happy exclamation point after "basset hound." I like to imagine the cake was made for 2 pets--a female donkey and a dog who is a basset hound.

Hey at least they spelled "congratulations" correctly.

The BAC made my husband laugh, deviled eggs everywhere. Thanks, Jen.

I'm not touching Ho Thing Special. You can't make me.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJerry

Well how about that! Nice to see my last name on a cake and a post here on the Cake Wrecks site. Yup, it was h*ll on wheels as a youngster being called hound and being female. My brother had not one whit of a problem with that handle. The Bassett name, at one time, was statistically in the top 2000 common names in the USA. Thanks for the grins, always!

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLyza

I can TOTALLY see someone calling in and specifically requesting a big a** cake. I bet that was intentional. In which case, it's hilarious.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

Have to say, I'd be more than happy with a BIG A$$ CAKE, though I'd be happy to share with Jenny the Basset Hound...

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdeemack

Hey, big ass cake does not belong! It is full of win!

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteroctobee

Co-worker 1: What kind of cake do you want for your birthday?
Co-worker 2: I don't care, as long as it's a big-ass cake. We've got a lot of co-workers to feed.
Result: The BIG ASS CAKE.
WV: Oppedys -- Hurry and oppedys ice cream carton and serve it with the Big Ass Cake, before it melts!

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The Big Ass Cake is the funniest cake you've had up here in months! It's rare a cake is LOL-worthy without the additional funny dialogue from you guys. This really speaks for itself. OMFGLOLL

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSylvia

Not familiar with T-pain, but I'd have guessed the Big Ass Cake was on purpose just because it actually looks pretty well done -evenly spaced, correctly spelled, etc.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMira

HA HA HA! I can always count on you guys to make me laugh even when I'm having a crap day at work! Thanks for these!

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGlenn Ferrell

Ho Thing Special!

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterI Am Bells

The BIG ASS CAKE should be under "Cake MASTERPIECES." Unless it's a smallish cake. Then it's totally a wreck.

WVW: undecks
Takes back a surprise clobber to the head.

"Joe, realizing the person he has just knocked unconscious was the pizza delivery boy, undecks him, takes the pizzas, and leaves a generous tip on his prone body."

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterD.B. Echo

Ah Jen, thank you so much for two postings in a row of my favourite sort of wreck, the ones I characterize as "the under neat wreck." You are too good to us.

My second favourite is the missed mark wedding cakes. I hope you have some more lopsided two-tiered round brown cakes alongside their three-tiered, square burgundy models.

wv: vantsm - I always vantsm more of these sidesplitting wrecks.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAviatrix

About the Band Bride cake

I suspect this is congratulating someone about to get married and they wanted a wedding band and a bride on the cake along with the congratulations message and this got written down as "band, bride on it".

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'd be worried the 'Nothing Special' was truth in advertising moment.

Especially as it pops up (assuming) the morning after the the Big A$$ Cake night.

WV: Reatie -- reatie bytes, missing fragments, message corrupted.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermsyendor

I just had a birthday and I didn't get a cake. So next year I am requesting a Big Ass Cake!! I better get it too! :)

Thanks for the many laughs!!

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHockey Mum

Lol. I had to fix a cake that our decorator did once. It was a Happy Birthday Tweety cake. Which is the name of the edible image. They didn't want any writting on the cake.
The new person in the bakery wrote on the slip "Happy Birthday Tweety" and the decorate put the image on the cake (good) but wrote on the cake "Happy Birthday Tweety!" (bad) I had to do my best to scrape of Tweety. Oh my.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLeeAnn

Am I the only one who's interpreting this as "hot thing special"? I realize there's only one t, but since it's capitalized...

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

At least it wasn't SHAPED like a big a$$! Who would want to eat that kind of cake?

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I would die happy if I got the Big Ass Cake XD

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the big ass cake! (That cake could have taken a terrible turn, but I'm thankful that it didn't!)

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFanboy Wife

So, I thought CW2 said "Band Bride," and I'm wondering, "what is a "band bride?"

Then the Big Ass Cake. Not "big-ass" as in, "Wow, that's a big-ass car you're driving," but more like Big
Ass-Cake. What would an ass cake look like? I shudder.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEtiquette Bitch

The Big Ass Cake is bad ass.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBree

Perfect timing for this on fb this came up with the Big A$$ Cake picture and someone had just asked me what kind of cake I was going to make for my birthday so I shared the link and said. "This is what I am making" LOL! LOVE IT!

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterIvannabite2

Is that last one a Ho Thing Special? Maybe that's the appetizer for the Big Ass Cake.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the Big A** cake! :D At least it didn't include any anatomy. Pass me a fork! Or better yet, give me the place's number so I can place an order for my next birthday party at work. They'd get a kick out of it.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

So did T-Pain originally order a "Big-Ass Chain," which only came about due to an error and really belongs on a website somewhere called "Jewelry Wrecks?" Instead of complaining, maybe he realized he'd found the gimmick he'd been looking for, and he wisely decided to wear it with pride. Now, he's stuck with it on his birthday, too. That's show-biz for ya! :D

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This blog never fails to make me laugh out loud. THANK YOU for sharing these confectionary disasters!

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Printed Thought

Ok that big ass cake.. is it warning us what will happen if we even attempt to eat it? If so that still wouldn't stop me I would grab my fork and dig right in lol.. sometimes I think these wreckerators are trying to drive their victims insane on purpose.

March 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

Maybe the (now) Mrs Hopper and her sweetheart were both in the marching band...hence, a band bride. I know several band couples from my marching band days (college) who got married. It sounds like the sort of thing those crazy band people might know, filtered through a wreckerator.

March 6, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDawn

Before clicking on the last one, I thought it said "hotwing special" and got all excited about eating hot wings and cookies. Sadly, I was mistaken. And now I'm hungry.

March 6, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKitty Katz

The Basset Hound cake is hilarious! If you've ever seen Madagascar 2, then you should totally get the inside joke on this cake. The only thing cakewrecky about it is the terrible handwriting and misspelling of "Basset."

March 6, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGabrielle

At least that last one has sprinkles.

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJames

"What do you want for your birthday?"

"Nothing special..."

"Oh, c'mon!"


March 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The Basset Hound could have been making a reference to Madagascar 2 at the end when they are playing telephone with the monkeys and instead of "pass it on", they say "basset hound"

February 23, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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