Search

My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Mar082010

The Groom's Revenge

Some groom's cakes really make you wonder: what did the bride do to the guy to deserve this?

Head Caterer: "No, no, no! We definitely want both cakes on the same table.

Why? Uhh...well, honestly, because the groom just slipped me a twenty."

As we all know, nothing says, "Look!! A dead deer!" quite like an edible photo of - waaaait for it - a dead deer.

And really, what photo could possibly be more appropriate on the day you pledge your life and love to another?


Now, far be it from me to say a guy shouldn't have a patriotic groom's cake. However, there's expressing love for your country, and then there's....

...well...this:


Of all the things that could be expressed on your wedding day, I'm pretty sure "Git R Done" is the least appropriate.
(The lasciviously winking Spongebob isn't helping, either.)

Still, as you loyal Wrecktators well know, it can always be worse:

Bringing a whole new meaning to "foot in mouth" on your wedding day.
(Yes, it's a foot.)

Mike R. reports: "This was the groom's cake at a wedding I photographed. (The groom lost his big toe in a lawnmower accident as a kid.) You can't see it in this photo, but of course the cake is red raspberry."

Oh, of course. I'm curious, though: Did the lawnmower take all his toenails, too?

Wait, don't answer that; I feel some dry heaves coming on.

Solli S., Amanda, & Anony M., that little piggy's gonna go "wee wee wee!" all the way through my nightmares tonight. [shudder]

- Related Wreckage: Proper Grooming

« Wedding Day Jitterbugs | Main | Sunday Sweets: Cartoons with Character »

Reader Comments (101)

haha! I'm such a fan of your site...and now, my cousin's groom's cake (the one with the big toe missing) if being featured...awesome!

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMaria Claudia

Erika said:
"... yes, guy I knew with the lawn mower accident did recently get married. ... He thought his battle wound was cool - wore flipflops all the time."

...And Casey said:
"... And losing his big toe really IS the highlight of his life?"

Imagine living with this guy:

"Did I ever tell you about the time a lawnmower cut off my toe?"
"Only about fifty million times."
"See, I was mowing the lawn uphill with my flip-flops on ..."
"Yes, I know."
(Following you into the next room) "... And the grass was wet ..."
"Yeah, OK."
(Following you at a run down the street) "... And I heard a strange noise from under the mower, so I lifted it up ..."
"Oh, no, I'm late for my endoscopy. Gotta run"

(Four hours later) "... and my foot still really hurt when they took the bandage off, and ..."

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Lord have mercy. Esp. the toe one. This is your WEDDING day, not a frat party, people! Have some class!

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

A toilet cake at a wedding? Seriously?

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

When I was growing up, groom's cakes were pretty much just chocolate cakes with fruit or other non-frilly decorations. That's what I had at my wedding. Never saw one like this in person, but, well, to each his own.

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCatherine

At first I thought the toilet was an urn...it took me looking at the picture in another tab and seeing the picture name to understand it better. Also, is it from the submitter's wedding? I pity her.

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAndi

And people wonder why one would choose not to have a groom's cake.

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Hahaha funny stuff

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

am i totally pathetic that i think all the little army guys around the "git r done" cake are way cool? granted, the spongebobs are really weirding me out, but i have to admit i like the army dudes. and hey, if the guy likes hunting, since groom cakes are supposed to represent hobbies, which is worse? a dead deer or empty used shell casings (as we have seen before). personally, i'd go with the edible photo paper over dirty casings.

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaura P.

I thought the foot/severed toe cake was making the statement that the groom tried to avoid marriage by shooting off his toe, the same way that some draftees tried to avoid military service. It had perhaps some "coyote ugly" overtones--not a great theme at a wedding, yes, but I like it more than what the story really was.

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

...my parents, newly wed, walking back down the aisle to exit, grandpa yells 'git'r done!'. no, this is NOT the end of the story. they get outside, grandma from HIS side says 'you're not gonna come back knocked up again, are you?' ahh family. these cakes would be a relief for us if they were the worst part of a wedding!

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbrittmattpaddywak

Maybe he married the deer? :?

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSuperGrouper

Spongebob on a Git-R-Done cake makes it just a little less redneck, maybe 1/10th less. Now if they had included winking pictures of Larry the Cable Guy, it would have been hillbilly heaven.

I couldn't imagine any of the guests to actually eat any part of the toilet cake or the foot cake. I can take an edible image of a dude and a dead deer though. My standards aren't that high!

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBree

Jenna: You would have loved my wedding, too. I wore electric blue, my sister wore hot pink. We didn't have a theme. We didn't even have a cake! We got married outside so we'd have a beautiful backdrop, but that is all.

Anonymous @ 2:43pm: Yes, as someone else already mentioned, "Git" is a redneck version of "get". It doesn't mean what it does in the UK, although I have known people (including my ex-husband) that the term "git" would apply!

My ex-husband's groom's cake just had an edible picture of a drum set. It was put on top of a large plastic record album, because he was also working as a DJ at the time.

These cakes, however, would not have been allowed at either one of my weddings!

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

Maria, please tell me the toe cake groom wasn't from Indiana. 'Cause I'm really sad to admit that the first thing that crossed my mind was, "ZOMG, that's my bf from HS!"

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCyndi

I've never been to a wedding where the groom had ordered the groom's cake... it's always been a gift/surprise from the bride...

March 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterminty tutut

Oh boy where do I begin? That first cake with the toilet.. whatever that groom is thinking I have a feeling that marriage may be heading right down that toilet lol. And anyone that thinks a cake with a picture of a dead deer on it is appropriate at a wedding must really want a quick funeral once the bride sees that cake.

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

OMG! Yuk! It makes you wonder whether they actually love their "wives"/"wives to be" or whether it's a battle to regain control of the wedding! Can you imagine entering the reception following a ceremony to be greeted by any of those!

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDrawn to Caricature

I actually think these cakes are great. I wish my ex-husband had paid enough attention to the wedding planning to want his own cake. I think it's unique, different from the cookie cutter basic wedding cake that most people have. It adds a taste of what the groom is actually like, unlike most of the other wedding bits.

Despite what it seems, the bride isn't the only one at the wedding. Let the groom have part of it as well!

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterainbthen

Wow, either lawnmower/toe accidents are shockingly common (somebody call OSHA), or an amazingly large number of people know the guy with the foot cake.

At least the injury hasn't held him back socially ...
(That cake may change all that, though.)

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGary

I'm with Gary here. Maria Claudia, clue us in: is he *really* obsessed with his toe???

I had a cyst removed from an ovary when I was in college. Do I need to commemorate that with cake on my wedding day? Really?

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTammi

Okay, this has been bugging me since yesterday. How does the guy with no big toe wear flip-flops?

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCatherine

It looks to me like the inscription on the toilet cake reads "LIVING PLUMBING CO."

So maybe the groom is a plumber? Or life is a toilet? Or plumbing is living? So confused.

WV: angly. If my husband had had a groom's cake like these, I would have been plenty angly.

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarianne O

With a travesty such as this at your wedding, it any wonder few take their marriage seriously?

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

Catherine: "Okay, this has been bugging me since yesterday. How does the guy with no big toe wear flip-flops?"

Good point hahaha! I guess I meant sandals.

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterErika

I like the hunter's cake, especially the safety orange frosting border. And the army cake could well be for someone in the Army or Marines whose platoon motto is "Git 'er Done!" I'd have asked for an upgrade on the flotsum, myself, but the cake is not bad in itself, IMHO.
LittleRed1

March 9, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

maybe that cake (#2) ties into the menu. You know, Elk Steaks, Deer Meat (can't spell venicine?)something or other? you know in some parts that is classy!

March 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlisa

I learned something very important today. Don't read Cake Wrecks while still recovering from food poisoning. Blergh.

March 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersusan

I can't believe no one picked up on the deer cake......I think it is hilarious that the guy in the photo is holding the deer up by its rack. "Nice rack ya found there, bud!" Reference to deer or bride?

Granted, the entire concept is completely intolerable, but noticing that just cracked me up.

March 10, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteranglnlmbo

LOL! My son and I were just looking at your photos when he said what's that mommy? (pointing to the last photo of the foot missing a toe" I said "that's a cake in the shape of a foot". He then proceeded to look closer and declare. . . "no mommy that's not a foot cake, that's a jelly fish!". the thing kids say.

March 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRose

Best about the Git R Done cake is the Tank pictured is actually a Nazi Marder III http://www.tamiya.com/english/products/35255marder3m/marder3m.jpg pretty big mistake to make

March 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Here, and I thought maybe the bride and groom really liked "Stripes" with Bill Murray: "Sgt. Hulka, you're our big toe."

March 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterOurMrsCorso

I do know the toe guy (I might start calling him that now) and I was at that wedding!

he's not obsessed with the toe of course, it's just kind of an interesting thing about him, and the bride was totally on board for having the groom's cake in the shape of his foot. We all thought it was funny, and I still tell people about it even 3 years later. The family has a somewhat dark sense of humor so no one was weirded out.

The wedding was otherwise normal and lovely and lots of fun. If nothing else, the admittedly kinda freaky-looking foot cake was a great conversation piece esp for people who didn't already know each other to connect and laugh about. (and no, he's not from Indiana whoever asked...)

March 11, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHolly

Maybe it was a reminder to "toe the line."

March 12, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJeff

Haha. Thanks for the above. But it's not about whether I approve of a wedding that makes it great or terrible to me: it's whether the couple did something they loved, or if they just did the "normal" stuff because they felt they "should". I'm happy to attend a Wedding Industrial Complex-tacular white tulle and boring cake extravaganza if that's really what the bride and groom *want*.

The second it goes into "it was nice and normal" (sorry, comment above me: I really hate it when weddings are approved of because they are 'normal' - what does normal even mean and why is it so important?) or "that's not wedding appropriate" (which assumes all weddings are formal churchy affairs and not what they can be, which is anything from a punk rock party to bowling night to BBQ) or "it's not weddingy" (most wedding stuff is ugly so it's good if it's not weddingy in my book)...

...that's when I get all annoyed.

So yeah. That foot cake is ugly because it's ugly. The deer with the "nice rack" and the SpongeBob Git-R-Done are horrid. But not because they're bad "for a wedding": they're just bad.

Just like most "normal" wedding cakes are, to some people, also kind of ugly.

And I still don't get why it's the groom who gets the fun cake while the bride is supposed to pick the boring, tasteless one with all the frosted flower crap on it.

March 12, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenna

i lOVE this phenom of groom's cakes in the USA! we don't really have that tradition in Canada...

GIT R DONE.

heehee!

March 12, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterlyndsay

Oh, I feel so flattered seeing the photo I sent you some time ago! Now I am a knight! Thanks, oh thanks! *crawling backwards* :-)
Best regards from South Germany, I love this blog.

March 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSolli S

I totally thought that last cake was a tribute to LOST (the four toed statue...) It would have made for a better story than "our grooms cake was a tribute to my husband losing his toe.."

March 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

At first I thought that the deer picture was of a guy posing with a live deer at a petting zoo as a joke.

I want to remain innocent.

March 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMartin

The toe cake is disgusting, yes, but not nearly as disgusting as the groom cake described to by a friend who'd seen at her cousin's wedding (no, sorry, no snaps--she was too afraid):
The severed toe from "The Big Lebowski" character
Bunny Lebowski complete with green sparkly toenail polish (icing, of course, and not really nail polish) and a visible toe bone. It was HUGE sheet cake that the groom proudly boasted cost more than the actual wedding cake. Yowza.
(there was a similar cake made on Food Network's show "Ace of Cakes" which was cool to look at on the TV, but would probably gross me out in real life)

March 16, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Can you do a Sunday Sweets column about Groom's cakes? I've never heard of the tradition before cakewrecks, so I'm getting the impression that it is a fundamentally flawed genre, like the pregnant woman shower cake.

March 17, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteriblogelsewhere

does the toeless guy have really bad ankle edema too?

March 24, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdaffodil

I, quite possibly, went to high school with the Severed Toe Cake couple. Unless another 9-digit benedict had this arranged (also taking the lawnmower accident into account).

March 25, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"And the toilet cake was exhibit A of her divorce proceeding."

March 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ewww..I'm grossed out about how shiny the foot is.

June 10, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Makes me wonder if these grooms designed their own cakes. Or if someone else while drunk at the bachelor party thought, "No grooms cake? I've got to fix that!"

If I'd lost a toe in a childhood accident - I would NOT want it memorialized in cake on my wedding day, regardless of how well (or in this case poorly) it was done.

June 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The Big Whoop cake is actually a big whoopie pie! I lived in New England for a few years and these are quite a popular and delicious treat! It is a soft cookie sandwich with vanilla cream in the center. So it is one of their creative sayings when they say Big Whoop on a whoopie pie! Hope that helps clarify things a little!

May 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Great ceremony,
but I prefer receptions.
Yum, cake! Down the hatch!

January 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

What the heck is a groom's cake???
I don't think we have those in the UK...

February 19, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

We just celebrated our first wedding anniversary last mont and these make me glad my husband didn't want a groom's cake.

July 4, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLauraK

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>