My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

The Abbreviation Sensation Sweeping the Nation

I guess it started innocently enough.

When your "Yay Jesus" crowds out the rest of the text, you cut a few corners on the "birthday" to cram it all in. Ok, fine. I get it.

The problem started when some wreckerator somewhere looked at that and thought, "Hey, that saves me four whole letters! I should write it that way ALL the time!"

And so...[dramatically steepling fingers] began.

First a dash was added, to make it seem more respectable:

It's an unwritten rule in baking that you can butcher a name as much as you like, so long as it's followed by a question mark.

Then they ditched the 'B':

Next, the "day":

The first 28 were delicious.

And finally, inevitably, we arrived at...this.

One can only hope they were charging by the letter.

Can it get any worse, you ask?

Oh, please. You know better than to ask that by now, don't you? [smirk]

It's like a code. Am I wishing you a happy birthday? Maybe, maybe not. I might be wishing you a Herniated Bowels day. Because, yeah, I do that sometimes.

And yet, shockingly, we still haven't gotten to the worst part of this whole abbreviation craze.

Think with me for a moment: are there any holidays out there that might not do well in an abbreviated form? Any at all? C'mon. Think about it.

Give up?

Oh, good. I'm positively itching to show you this last photo.

It's a Valentine's Day cake. Scout's honor.

Thanks, Erin C., Aimee P., Michelle W., Angela C., Darnell, Elizabeth, & Chris. Y'all are hunk a' hunks of burnin' love in my book.

« Wrecky Roughage | Main | The Number Won »

Reader Comments (96)

Hey, faunablues. It is strawberry season in Florida in February. It makes the national news every year because they have to flood the fields with water to protect the berries from freezes.

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

I always snicker, and smirk, but I rarely laugh out loud.

You got me today.

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

@Karly H: they may not enjoy VD but I'm sure they enjoyed what they were doing when they GOT VD

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Great post! However, I do take issue with one part of the commentary: "Nat" is not a butchered name. It happens to be my name, and it's the name of at least two other people I've met. It's also the name of several fictional characters, such as the title character of the book "Nat, Nat, the Nantucket Cat." The cake still has issues, but don't assume the name was an error.

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNantucket Cat

"HB Day" must mean exam day. Don't forget, you need to use those HB pencils to fill out the Scantron sheets!

And "Enjoy your VD" sounds more like a spiteful ex's cake than a Valentine's cake...

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterShadyman

Nantucket Cat,

We were just saying that the decorator probably got the name wrong, thus the question mark.


Oh no. I'm at work, trying to laugh only under my breath at a VD cake. I love this blog!

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelch

...Because Lord knows I enjoy MY "VD", every year! *snerk*

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

"Herniated Bowels Day" just made me LOL at work. People are lookin funny. :)

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Kitty Fantastico

The way I see it, the first cake can have two meanings. First, it could have been ordered by a super-Christian family to celebrate the Son of God. Oh, and their daughter's birthday.

The second meaning is that Jesus (pronounced Hey-soos) is the Hispanic kid who, say, just won the spelling bee. That Erin has to share a birthday cake with.

Either way, I feel a little sorry for Erin. At least she got cake.

And, yeah, the VD cake killed me.

Not unlike certain VDs would...

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCorianne

lol, In the vein of abbreviating Valentine's Day, in high school I knew this guy who worked for the school paper. He had a Valentine's Day survey that he asked some people to fill out. One of the questions was something along the lines of "What's your favorite thing about VD?"

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteranacsadder

Happy Day could have been intentional. That's how my friend expresses birthday wishes.

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertygrr

thanks for posting a cake cheering on my dad!! (his name is JESUS, pronounced "hey-soose")

i 2nd Amanda's idea that the VD cake is a "passive aggressive break up cake". it just makes it *that* much better!!!
[insert wicked laughing]

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRenee

I read "HB Day" as "HB DOY". I think that makes it way more fun.

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelanie

I think the second cake could be read as a question, as in "Well Nat, are you having a happy 1st b-day?"

But "HB Day"? Are bakeries accepring orders via text message now or something?

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWildaBeast

Well, those of whose parents didn't bother to think about initials when naming us...

Valerie D
(can you imagine the ration of s4iT I got as a teenager)

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterValerie

The VD cake is awesome.

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRebecca

What distresses me is when you actually say "B-day" out loud. Like, I need to celebrate that lowly and unloved piece of porcelain?? Poor Nat, Happy 1st B-day? I understand the question mark, alright!

MC from NZ

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I am the actual person who wrote "Enjoy Your V.D!" on that ice cream heart shaped cake!! I assure you this was done by Customer Request, not employee laziness!! They were giving it to a male friend and thought it was hilarious, which it is!! I had trouble writing it as I was laughing so hard!! Glad to see it on this site!!

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSlab Girl

What on earth is the "Yay Jesus" all about? I see we've move past the sperm balloons to primary colored condom balloons.

The "Happy VD" reminds me of my days as an ED nurse when we'd make calls essentially notifying people that indeed, it was their happy VD day!! We could've just sent a cake.

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterofsageandsepia

There are several guys in the area where I live named Jesus -usually Jesus Roberto Romero, Jesus Francisco de Zavala, you get the idea. So perhaps the first cake is supposed to be "Congratulations Jesus" for whatever he did and "Happy Birthday" et cetera.

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The last cake almost killed my husband. Seriously. He was laughing so hard he choked.

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

All I can say to the last one is.. WTF?!

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wow, I've never been to a blog like this before! Love the pics!

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRoni

I hope that VD cake comes with some meds.


July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnna


July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDarlene

I love love LOVE the title of this blog entry!

And, of course, HB stands for "Humongous Bighead"!

Enjoy your VD! *snort* Not touching that with a ten-foot pole, literally!

July 21, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

I laughed out loud!!! I mean LOL. We are hoping to adopt

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Hmmm... back in college my friends and I referred to Valentine's Day as V.D., mostly because of our chronic single status when the holiday arrived. Still, I can't say that even we would want to see it written on a cake, even in jest!
Obv ths ppl spnd 2 mch tm txtng nd dnt no hw 2 spll rl wrds ne mre.

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

Jesus (probably pronounced HaySoos) is also a very common Hispanic name and is likely not intended to be sacreligious. The Jesus we Anglos identify with is also a derivation of the name, Joshua, and who gets excited about Joshua, much like the John/Jack thing. Yes, the cakes were simply astounding today. Norine

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh my I nearly died seeing that last cake.. I read it out loud to my husband who dropped his game controller lol. That cake was absolutely beautiful until you get to the V.D.. man what a way to ruin someone's Valentine's Day. I sure hope it wasn't someone's smarty boyfriend that brought that home. He would need diamonds to fix that lol.

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

My grandma always just writes H.G. on all cards she sends. Depending on the situation, I assume it stands for 'hartelijk gefeliciteerd' (Dutch for heartfelt congratulations), wich makes sense, 'hartelijke groeten' (heartfelt greetings), wich also makes sense or 'holijke gerstmis' (herry gistmas) wich doesn't make any sense.

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

you know, at first i thought it was for national vermin day abbreviated VD. yes there IS a national vermin day. Oh honey! what a uh... lovely...? cake! hehe... you know how much i love rats!

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChaos6267

Hilarious! Does anyone else see small sea shells on that one cake? Ick. Hopefully they got washed before being shoved into the --- I mean -- placed on the cake.

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh! I can't breath. I mean, I have heard people joke about calling it VD, but seeing it in icing is just too much. My ribs are sore and my children think I have had some sort of laughing fit which I can not explain, but it was worth it.

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLynn

I just have to say, I love your Weasley reference in the title for this post! X-D Fred and George forever!

ROTFLOL, my verification word below is "suprodoo"!!! How fitting!

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The last cake has my brain playing a 70's Ad Council PSA:

VD is for everybody...

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterwhizkidforte

Not sure what's worse - VD or B-Day (as in beday)

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That V.D. cake wasn't an abbreviation for Valentine's Day but really was meant to be Venereal Disease. I gave it to my (now) ex boyfriend after finding out he slept with my best friend a week before Valentine's Day and four days after she confided to me that she had one. He figured it out before too long. I'll never forget it.


*Disclaimer: I made that up. The cake was never anywhere near me, far as i know. The situation was just running through my head when i saw the cake. Love it! Abbreviations gone wrong! XD

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRandomosity

I'm copying the VD cake for my husband for next Valentine's Day!

July 22, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Am I the only one that saw "Happy 29th Beth" and started hearing a version of 'Henry VIII' ... "I'm Beth the 29th I am, Beth the 29th I am I am ...."

July 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSyracuseWolvrine

I wanna order that for my ex... just to scare the sith outta him. hehehe

July 23, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPoetrix

Oh my. When I saw the last cake, I started shaking with laughter, a strange choking noise coming from my throat. My six-year-old looked at me and said, "Are you okay, Mommy?"

July 25, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKristen

The HB Day cake could have been intentional. I'm an engineer and we use so many acronyms every day that it's become an inside joke to just write HB Day or even just HBD on Facebook and cards and things...kind of as a way of mocking how many acronyms we use every day. I can totally see them thinking it would be funny to continue the joke in cake form. So that one may have not been the fault of the bakery. Maybe.

July 26, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Since my daughter's name is Beth and she introduced me to Cake Wrecks, I'd like to recreate the "Happy 29th Beth" cake for her birthday. I think I can do it: heart-shaped chocolate cake, no frosting, white lettering. But I'm puzzled about the red things. Any thought as to what they are?

August 12, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBeth's mom

All things considered,
I wonder how long this Beth
will hang around here.

July 15, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>