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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Aug042010

What's This?

Earlier today John had the song "What's This?" from Nightmare Before Christmas stuck in his head.

After looking at these Wrecks, now *I* do.

 

What's this? What's this?
There's color everywhere


What's this?
There's white things in the air

 

What's this?


It's orange and so hairy - what's the deal with those two berries? I don't care!
What's this?


[bumpahbumpahbumpabumpabumpabBUM]

What's this? What's this?
I can't believe my eyes,


What's this?
A donkey tank surprise?

What's this? A swirly mass so curly, could the purple be too girly? Should this song be ending early? No we're going 'til we hurl-y!!

 

What's this?

 

Could it be, oh could it be? Did I get my wish?

Here's something that makes sense: a meteorite bird fiiiish!

What's this?

[dumpadumpadumpadumpbaBUM]

[wheeyouwheeyouwheeyouwhee...]

What's this? What's this? There's something very wrong!

What's this? That blue thing's really long.

What's this?

It's positively crappy, and yet I feel so happy, have I possibly gone sappy? I think I need a nappy 'cuz this song is kind of rappy so I guess I'll get a frappey and go shopping at the Gappy...

WHAT.

IS.

THIS?!?


S.K., Patrick T., Chris E., Reagan B., Rebekah W., Austin L., Alex S., Kaylyn M., & Mikaela, your guess is as good as mine.

 

Oh, and for your continued "enjoyment" I have a special treat today: while we were writing this post, John & #1 (aka "the other Jen") kept singing it to get the cadence right. This...got really entertaining.

So, I decided to tape them.

 

There were a few interruptions, but overall I think you'll find their rendition...um...well...just don't have the volume up too loud, k?

 

"Enjoy!"


 

(If you're wondering what my contribution is here, I'm the one doing the scrolling. And giggling.)

 

Update from john: Please note that no animals were harmed during the making of this video. :)

 

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Reader Comments (438)

The first one is actually when Teletubbies mark their territory...see Wreck post previohttp://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/2008/07/when-teletubbies-need-more-fiber.html to show "rainbow poo"....

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterfullnovembermoon

"I'll teach you the proper poise when you talk to boys-!" Ooooooh goodness. You guys are awesome. I think the first cake looks like the cover of Oh, The Places You'll Go. Or like the swirl of water at the bottom of some magical toilet. Like some unicorn's toilet. Yeeeeeaaaah...

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSami

Well done all!

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSteph

WTF are they smoking?!

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This is my most favorite CakeWrecks post ever. EVAR. That video had me in tears.

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDanielle

lol..." her dog died..' " Oh". (pause) ...what this! etc..

lol oh the show must go on....

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercaferacers66

You guys are AWESOME!!!!! In another life... I want to be you. :)

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That lady singing had a voice just like the voice of 'wife of nalts' on youtube! Nice voice!!

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I loved this. Thanks for putting that video.

"Yeah I'm doing something... ...stupid."

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJW

Hey, if the CW blog and book thing doesn't pan out for you guys, John & The Other Jen can always take their act on the road as "Cake Wrecks: The Musical".

Really great voices and superb lyrics!

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

This is the first time, in the year that I have been following Cake Wrecks, that I have felt compelled to leave a comment. All I have to say is:

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA *gasp* HAHAHAHAHAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA *gasp*
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! *pees pants a little*

P.S. Those "interruptions" had to have been set up; They were just TOO perfect.

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterflinchagainstthefire

Wow, this sums up beautifully what I love about CakeWrecks...

fluent, witty and delicious mockery!

You guys are stars; the cakes are just a conduit for your mad skillz :)

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBrooklet

Thank you for not editing out the interruptions; they added a touch of humor to an already entertaining performance!

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercatchat105

I dont know what exactly #1 is... but im thinking a dog got into a box of crayons...

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertennal

Best. CakeWrecks. Post. EVER! My fiance and I were laughing and singing as we read it. And right after, he reminded me to feed my meteorite-bird-fish (well, actually, they're just guppies) but it lead me to have a laughing asthma attack for the last 5 minutes. Can I invoice you for that?

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChristina M.

This is one of my favorite posts ever. Also,

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS HAVE YOU SEEN THIS HAVE YOU SEEN THIS?!!! Sunday Sweets material:

http://weburbanist.com/2010/08/03/cake-art-over-25-awesomely-decorated-cakes/

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLiz-a-nator

LOL! This is so hilarious that i have to leave my comments too! LOL! Too funny! I had to control my laughter in the office while i was watching the video!! Great rhyming! Now i have that song stuck in my head too!!

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterfaithy, the baker

...and maybe some wrecky material too...

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLiz-a-nator

Is that 5th one supposed to be a cake version of a Magic Eye picture? Maybe if you squint enough something will make sense...

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered Commentererika

Amazing! I seriously can't identify even a single one of these things that are being represented in cake form.

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnna-Jeannine "DJ AJ9"

Can... Can I give you all hugs?

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatalina

LOVE the video at the end-- #1 has a good voice, and love her dry wit. I definitely agree that this should be an occasional feature. The comment "once more with sprinkles" for your singing segments is a great title!

As for the cakes... yup, agree that the first one looks like what happens after unicorns get into the skittles.

Is something wrong with me that I think the orange hairy cake is kinda cute? Maybe I liked Monsters Inc a bit much :) The meteorite bird fish is kinda cute too!

The purple and teal cake-- somebody went to a lot of effort with that one! Very carefully done swirls... inexplicable design. Deer with antlers???? in purple and teal???

I felt sorry for Carrie until I saw poor Sean's cake. Wow, that's wreckiness at a whole new level of bad. I think that wreckerate needs to be sent to "rehad" (my WV)

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

Number one is Number Two. From clowns. I'm just sayin'...

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

Uh....nice singing. Keep your day job,'k?

...
btw, what IS your day job?

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMe!

This was the best post ever! I laughed hysterically. I love you guys. It feels like we are friends with the same nutty humor. Keep it up. You make my day brighter..

PS> you need to make more videos!

August 4, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKathy M

The first one made me think "taste the rainbow"...it's Skittles poo!!!

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary

My Husband and I love this site! I showed "What's this? What's this?
There's color everywhere" and he said "it's care bear poop"!

Thanks for the laugh!

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMonica

oh. my. god. *laughs*

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAshleas

well, normally I'm against drug testing in bakeries, but these cakes...WTF? love the video, you guys don't need drugs either.

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered Commenternancy jeanne

This is the greatest thing ever. In fact, it's SO great, it brought me out of lurking. I've watched this five times today when I should be working on my novel, and let me tell you, it's not helping the atmosphere! xD This better go viral, EVERYONE needs to see this! My favorite parts are the heavy sighs every time the phone rings.

Oh, and my word verification is stienced, as in, "All critics were stienced when they heard Number 1 and John's amazing singing!"

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDSan

I love your page, but this has made my night! Thank you so much for uploading it! I absolutely loved it!

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelia

OK too many comments to sift through to see if someone else has already said it, but the orange spiky cupcakey-thing looks like the "hunger" character from the weight watchers commercials. Was someone trying to be ironic??

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKatherine

we all saw a deformed dalek in the thing with the rather too long blue thing...

the spell check hates the word Dalek.
what does it know?

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHawkfeather

The best part of the video was the one sided phone conversation. Now I want to know what they were talking about.

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa H.

To fully appreciate Donkey Tank Surprise you must move a few steps away from your computer screen and squint really hard until everything becomes blurry and the true image jumps out. Try it now, then send to 50 of your closest friends and your wish will come true. If you don't, you will have bad luck for 25 to 35 years (the life span of a donkey). Good luck!

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I normally get a good daily chuckle out of cakewrecks, but today gave me tears of joy. Excellent work on the song!

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMrs.Dr.Shot

I LOVED The song. Especially with iPhone interruptions. Sorry her dog died. Boo.

Creig

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterruffninja

great song

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Lol!!! I love the song. As for that first cake.. maybe a giant rainbow german shepherd pooped on that cake.. for that is what that looks like to me. The last pic is a gingerbread man that has been murdered by an evil poo frosting wielding wreckerator. Guess they just don't love gingerbread men :( lol.

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

What is this????

First cake:
What is this?
It's a rainbow?
A rainbow around a cake?
OMG OMG
It's so vivid.
What does it mean?
(sobs)

Sean's cake:
It looks like a Grade 2 papier mache project.

Love the video, but what was the phone convo really about?

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjeliecam

I love this post :) The video just made it so much better. And I love how in the video #1 takes the phone call, gets off and says "her dog died" then John lets out a very quiet sigh then the song continues as if there weren't an interruption....she even sounds just has happy and cheery as before lol.

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEm

That writing was stupendous!

Also the singing was not too shabby and John's "narrator voice" was perfect.

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAsh

That was the best post ever! I have loved this site for years and you always make me laugh but who knew you had the rhyming skills!

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterNatalie

I love the Nightmare Before Christmas and this post made me burst out laughing! The cadence is indeed spectacular and I especially enjoyed the video rendition. Thanks, guys!

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelch

That was awesome! Thank you for the laugh! I was quite impressed by your singing ability, btw.

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRedfroggy

I wonder what Rainbow Guy would say about #1. I say 'Technicolor poo.'

#4 I wonder if this wreck mysteriously caught fire shortly after Carrie saw it.

#6 Why do the isolated cupcakes have so many eyes? And leaves? What is the central object -- a firebird? It's rainbow-hued, too! What does it all mean?!

#7 I too was thinking scented candle. Or a votive candle to be lit as a prayer for peace, following what looks to have been the mother of all food fights. Used cake, anyone?

I first thought #8 was a carrot with a blue ribbon attached (some sort of county fair monstrosity, perhaps), but then I saw the (conical) hydrant. We've all seen how water drips from a hydrant; first it goes straight out to the side, then it kind of slopes down from there. The sheer realism of CCC's (heave) never commences to amaze me.

#9 is a minimalist homage to #1. The wreckist cleverly deconstructs the 'rainbow' and 'poo' elements for a SCAThing commentary on the futility of...trying to make sense of these wrecks.

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

"Her dog died"
*breaks out into song*

hahaha

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh my! I loved the song... you guys cracked me up!

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered Commentercostapuck

I think I know what the last one is...it's a gingerbread person with a twisted colon and in order to cheer themselves up, decided to put on makeup in a most abstract manner....so then I guess it's a gingerbread woman..........although that may not necessarily be the case.....

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That's the best song ever! I particularly enjoyed the telephone intermission.

August 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterOhio

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