Halloweenies

Warning: Weenie humor ahead!
Anyone else think the Halloween cakes are getting kinda handsy this year?
No, no. I mean, it seems like the designs are getting a lot...fresher.
"GOOSE!"
For example, some people might think these "pumpkins" represent huge...tracts of land:
Others might think it's a little chilly in here.
Hey, sure, bakers, just stick that candy corn anywhere:
I'd say the bat was a nice touch, but I think the ghost might disagree.
And when it comes to pumpkin cookies, this bakery offers up some stiff competition:
I'm surprised that they'd erect such a dinky display.
And while that might seem like a hard act to follow, it turns out there's more than one bakery trying to get ahead:
Psst. Bakers. Here's a tip.
Also, I think your problem stems from a cockeyed decorator with a testy disposition getting a good-natured ribbing from the bakery staff.
Ben, Kristen Z., Bevin C., Petra R., Zack J., and Sara W., these cakes salute you.
Sorry about that.
HEY RICHMOND!!! We'll see you at 7 pm!!! WOOHOO!!!
Reader Comments (67)
"I'm surprised that they'd erect such a dinky display." That line sent me scurrying to the loo because I was laughing so hard tears were about to leak down my leg. Then, Sharyn and Dark Lord sent me back.
I used to think I was pretty clever til I started hanging out here. :D Holy carp, people!! Back when Comedy Central had comedians on it was never a guaranteed laugh but CW is 5 days a week!!
Now, I MUST go to Panera tomorrow and purchase my very own penis pumpkin cookie (suitable for eating). bwahahahahahahahahahaha
I am still stumped as to why that piece of poop has hands coming out of it.
Oh my word!!! I haven't laughed this much in a long time! Thanks to Jen and all the commenters!! :D
"Holy Grail" reference FTW!
..the pumkins-boobs-"Tracts of land" thing.....is someone a closet Hetalia fan? Ukraine, anyone?
Oh man. First it's the hands in the erect poop now it's pumpkin boobs. I fear what is coming next and hope it isn't going to involve clowns, or mummy clowns lol. Yay to halloween wrecks.
Your commentary is beautiful, especially your Baker's tip at the end there. As amusing at the wrecks themselves are, your writing takes it to a whole nother level.
The 'nice touch' comment caused me to spit coffee onto my computer screen. I have learned my lesson about drinking coffee and checking your blog.
Best commentary ever! I am still laughung!
Unrelated to this post, but I'm working on a "double dog dare", so here goes!
Toronto in 10 days!
(think "Hey, Jude" for this)
Hey Jen, don’t ever quit
Taking failed cakes and making wisecracks
We enjoy your snark and every pun
It’s always fun, we all love cakewrecks
With every cupcake-cake you see, hey Jen, feel free
To spit on the floor, no one can blame you
Because you know that it’s a twit who ordered it
And they deserve spittle on their shoe
Na, na, na, na-na-na na, na-na-na na, hey Jen
I went to Panera bread today and they have pictures of that cookie everywhere! The Manager said the cookies are really "hard" to make!!
The "tracts of land" reference made my day.
so, did go to Panera and, sadly, the cakes at that location didn't look weird. even my mother said there was nothing wrong with them and she knew I was disappointed.
zoomom, great job with the double dog dare so far!! ;)
Those pumpkin penis cookies from Panera are awesome!!!
Let me know if you want a better pic of those god awful pumpkins. I'll take one of the trays full that I have to do every night. HA! I have to say, seeing those just made my week, considering one of the store managers sent a picture to my boss of the THREE (out of 70) that I made ONE NIGHT that actually looked like jack-o-lanterns. I found out because I got a big lecture about how "if every Panera every night did three cookies like that, it would be $12k a day in lost revenue" - no, if the cookies didn't look stupid, people would spend $3 each on them. Actually - sadly - those are the best selling fall cookies we've ever had. I'll be forwarding this to my boss now.
In defense of most of us, though, the speck is stupid, and the pics shown here are some of the worst I've seen. then again, what do they expect when half the bakers can't be bothered to use the icing tips we got, and the consistency of our icing is so bad that if you set the icing bag on the table for ten seconds, you have a sticky puddle of goo?
But...but...the pumpkin penis cookies are delicious!!!
Off to Panera for some Sugar Nookies...