My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Child's Play

"Hey, Earl! What are we gonna do with this Paranormal 3 cake that never got picked up? It's giving me the heebie jeebies."

"Gosh, I don't know. Why don't you throw some ribbon on it and make it a 'Princess Barbie' cake?"

"Ooh, good idea!"

"There we go. Some little girl is never going to forget this one!"




Thanks to Connie P., who tells me that's the last time she says "Bloody Mary" three times in a bakery.

« Wrecky Replay: Come On Barbie, Let's Go Party | Main | Tell Me What You Want, What You Really Really Want »

Reader Comments (40)

What do you think it is...?

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Gee, thanks for giving me the creeps this early O_o

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMINDY1

I guess the Susan Boyle cake wasn't much of a seller then......

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

That kinda looks like Gene Simmons. Without the make up.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHali Chambers

I don't understand this cake. I don't WANT to understand this cake. I have a very bad feeling that this may result in more of those creepy baby cakes. Or else in a surfeit of CCCs. Issues like this need to be addressed in whatever passes now for sex education classes.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterdrgns4vr

The Muppet crone lurks
behind innocent ribbon.
Just try to have fun.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Yay! Haiku Joy is back. I've been missing your posts.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Normally, I don't think ribbon belongs on cake. However, I think this case calls for MORE ribbons.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

Looks like an angry Lucy with a different hairdo (and spewing ribbon) about to say, "see these 5 fingers?"

(...looking at the way the nose is drawn, looks like a Peanuts character to me)

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLoo-E Loo-I

I think it kinda looks like Cavity Sam. Or, in this case, Cavity Samantha.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelonie

Dora? No. I think it's a misguided attempt at Snow White. Notice the blue and red flowers in her hair? She looks more like Homer Simpson dressed as Snow White. Snow Shite??

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHopie

I know that hair... that's Prince Humperdinck!

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

Reminds me of Captain Hook from the Disney version of Peter Pan. Yes?

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnnemarie

Can you post a link to whatever the paranormal 3 reference is? Is that the face under the ribbon? The cake is a total wreck regardless, but I don't get all the jokes. Help!

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterErin

I was thinking it was the character from a kids' book set. I can't remember the title, but it's about a nice teacher whose class won't pay attention, so she calls in "sick" and comes in dressed up like the cake picture and proceeds to be mean to the class. When the nice teacher comes back, the class is so happy to see her that they behave.

Regardless, it's creepy on a cake, and especially creepy with the princess things.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMarnie

It looks like a Kabuki mask, which you don't often see covered in ribbon.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmy'sMom

Conservative mom and ultra-feminist grandmother walk into a bakery.
M: "I want a cake for my three-year-old daughter."
G: "With a portrait of Freida Kahlo on it."
M: "Mom, she's not going to know who that is. Put Barbies on it, she'll like that. And a red border."
G: "Also a green border, so she doesn't grow up thinking she has to like red."
M: "Are you kidding?"
G: "In fact, put green on top of the cake too."
M: "No! I draw the line at green icing. Just leave it white. [whisper] And cover the Freida portrait with some ribbons or something. Thanks!"
Baker #1: "Hey, are you finished with that-- HOLY COW! Are you sure that's what the customer ordered?"
Baker #2: "Absolutely positive. Ribbons and everything."
[staring ensues]
B1: "There has to be some way to pull this together, to make the design really pop."
[more staring]
B2: "What about... sprinkles?"
B1: "Sprinkles?"
B2: "Yeah, sprinkles!"
B1: "You're a genius!"

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

Looks to me like someone was attempting to draw Snow White, but gave her a headband made from one of her sleeves instead of her hair bow. That's definitely her popped collar, which is white in the film but sometimes drawn as pale blue in her art.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjbrecken

You know it is not that hard to scrap off icing and re-decorate a cake.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterhollimatic

Snow White? A very, very vengeful Snow White.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterErika

I thought it might be the Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland ('cause those are hearts on her headpiece, aren't they?), but maybe not . . . Well, whatever it is, it's wrong, wrong, wrong and covering it with ribbons, sprinkles and Barbie flotsam does not help!

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterIkwig

Is it Weird Al?

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCMac

It's decorations such as this that make slicing into a cake a very easy task.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermary-anne

Marnie, I assume you mean Miss Nelson Is year when I was teaching fifth grade, I went all Viola Swamp on their misbehaving selves (black suits and tight hair buns and everything--thoroughly enjoyed it.)! :) I could see that, but I'm leaning more toward Susan Boyle or the angry Muppet...

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterrushingtoread

You'd be cross-eyed and grumpy looking too if you had to blow ribbons out of your nose.

I still have no idea who it's supposed to be, though.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterOldish Lady

Marnie; "Miss Nelson is Missing"! Right on! I loved that book!

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterzoomom

I just read an article that parents are buying and selling chicken pox lollipops as a way to avoid the vaccination. I guess this bakery decided to start making mumps cakes -- it looks like Snow White has a raging case of them.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

You're right, Marnie! It totally looks like Miss Viola Swamp--except for the flowery(?) headband. I'm pretty sure Viola Swamp would never wear that.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Alaineus

"There we go. Some little girl is never going to forget this one!"

Don't you mean, "Some little girl is never going to FORGIVE this one"?

Wholly crappe...what a diss ass ter.

I think we should all take a giant step back in time and beg someone to make a Charlie and the Chocolate Factory cake, because...well, just because.
For one thing, it would blessedly change the subject, and for another thing, think of the fun they could have with a Veruca Salt or a Violet
Beauregarde...not to mention a Charlie Bucket (my hero) But methinks that may have been way before all y'all's time..
ACTually, that tragically unhip thang reminds me of a long-ago comic character named Little Lulu. OR maybe Lucy from Peanuts. I give up! Just leave me alone!

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commenter~anamorous~

Welcome back Haiku Joy!

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermaggiew

I thought it was Olive Oyl. But I don't know why she would be on a princess cake. hmmmmm

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersuzeckis

It kind of reminds me of a very angry berries and cream boy.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAddy DelaMorte

Whatever it is, those are some wicked, wicked eyebrows!!

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLisa P.

Thanks much for the close-up of the creepy face. I was holding my computer up to my face and squinting to try and figure it out. Snow suggested... maybe a bitter-middle-aged version.

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSquinty

My initial reaction was Viola Swamp as well. From what we can see there is a striking ( and creepy!) resemblance.

Oh, and rushingtoread, you are my new hero. I have been waiting for years to be able to finally go all Viola Swamp on my students. This year's rowdy crew of 6th graders might just be the ones to push me over the edge...

November 8, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterVictoria

Eeeeeeeeeeek. And I haven't even seen Paranormal Activity 3 yet. But I will avoid creepy kids cakes at the bakery just in case they come haunt me lol.

November 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

was that dora???? .... a very messed up version of dora

I'm going with a cranky Susan Boyle.

And, "Yay" to Haiku Joy!

November 9, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh524

I was thinking that it looked like Snow White from Shrek 3. You know, when she start singing the Immigrant Song.

November 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKelticat

Caroline B and Haiku Joy for the WIN!!

I so needed that laugh, too. :D

November 9, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

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