My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Say What?

If the kids ask, April just got a new bottle of shampoo.

*flap flap flap*

Take note, everyone: "Yoth!" is the new 40.

Be sure to adjust your birthday cards accordingly.

Whoah. Not only did they screw up the "screwed up" inscription, it's a cupcake cake. [patooey!] Now, CCC defenders, I want you to look at all that icing smeared under and around the individual cupcakes, and then I want you to find a real cake, and I want you to apologize to it. Do it! Do it now!!


Hey, you know how some people's "i"s look like "7"s, and their "g"s look like "6"s?


Well, now you do.

A big thanks to Wreckporters J7ll W., Paulette M., Dan7elle S., Barbara M., & Ashle76h.

« Coming Up Roses | Main | Hoo-Wheee! »

Reader Comments (73)

the last cake looks like it might also be a "congradulations" cake-awesome!

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Finally! A picture revealing the truth about CCCs! A smeary, overly sugary, frostingy, filled truth. Not only do they look ridiculous, they're totally impractical to serve.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterana lisette

I am a woman in my mid-40s and "flappy" birthday is starting to become completely appropriate! I am starting to think that flying squirrels are just regular female squirrels that have reached middle age! :D

If I had a daughter, I would name her Ashle76H, but only if she was born on the sacred holiday of Yoth.

(Yay, comments are back! Now, everyone behave themselves, Mkay?)

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

They "stewed" up? What kind of stew? Beef stew? Because, in my humble opinion, pie is a better dessert to accompany stew than a CCC [patooey!].

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Poor Katie, I hope she isn't too flappy on her big day.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterStella

Yoth is the new Festivus!

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterpikkewyntjie

Maybe "Ashle76h" is her screen name - you know,

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTim

*shaking head*

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

You make it sound like all that icing on a CCC is a bad thing. It's icing! Even if it looks dumb, I'd still eat it!

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJeanette

Soooo, what happened to yesterday's comments?

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristian Johnson

Maybe April looks great in a tight T-Shirt and she's about to go wash cars for a fundraiser. And some wise guy sent her this. Either that, or someone wants to see some "April Showers" (but who gets the cake?)

"Flappy Birthday"! LOL Is Katie a duck? see, kids, this is why penmanship counts!

Just ask Melinda. who is celebrating her Yoth. maybe it's not 40th, maybe it's her "youth" she's celebrating. in which case, spelling counts. meanwhile, why did someone sprinkle herbs on her cake??? (never mind the curling ribbon and cheez whiz letters). What happened, did they decide the green letters looked awful so they went over it in orange? duh.

"We stewed up" --baffling.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjo

I don't understand Ashle' cake AT ALL. 76H? 76th? Now I have "76 trombones" in my head. meanwhile, who is 76 years old and named Ashley? that wasn't that common a name for decades! "Beverly" I'd believe

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Yoth is a red-lit cavern beneath K'n-yan. It was once inhabited by the Serpent Men who fled here to escape the destruction of Valusia. In Yoth they built great cities, of which only ruins remain. Explorers from K'n-yan visited Yoth frequently to learn more of the serpent people's scientific lore.

Happy Yoth!

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterM Scott Howard

Looks like the King has a Yeast infection...

Love your post!

spread the humor:

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercharlywalker

Yeah. That's why, as a grocery store cake decorator, I don't put the frosting under the cupcakes to secure them to the board like it says to do in the book. And I think it's gross to pick up a cupcake and have both the top and the bottom be all sticky.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterColleen

I admit it took me awhile to get the Ashle76H one. It's either too early or I'm still hung over from all the Hurricanes consumed over the past couple of days.

All things celebrated with cake must now have Flappy as part of the inscription. Flappy New Year! Flappy St Patrick's Day! Conradultions on Your Flappy Yoth! The possibilities are endless!

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLeftWingLock

I for one, will be celebrating MY "Yoth" for the fourth time, come this June...

WV - reopari: I'm not sure what's worse: These cakes, or the lame attempts to reopari them.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma!

Christian Johnson,

We didn't want to continue the controversy. Hope you liked the post.


March 10, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjohn (the hubby of Jen)

HUH?! D: W..T...F O_o

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I found the Ashle76h really funny- especially since my niece's middle name is Ashleigh!
So awesome!

WV: tenesisc: A book on the origin of tennis?
Decorating all of these cakes made the wreckerator tenesisc?

Yeah, that's all I've got.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Flappy birthday, indeed. (And I didn't know there were instructions for assembling CCCs, Colleen. I just assumed you got a photo and had to wing it. Good to know.)

wv: hemiski
I needed the hemiski maneuver after I choked on the yoth.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAuntie Meme

I have to laugh at seeing my name on one of the cakes.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelinda

Ah yes, a traditional Yoth cake. Complete with organic carrot-flavored icing and freshly-chopped parsley garnish. This is the standard by which all Yoth cakes should be measured.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Maybe Yoth is the holiday celebrated by followers of" rel="nofollow">Yog-Sothoth. And if it's not, it should be.

On Yoth, we play tuneless melodies on ancient pipes and eat formless cakes in nameless colors.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSusanna King

Stay in school kids!

I think that the only way to encourage someone to enjoy their Yoth is to wish them a Yoppy Birthday, but I haven't fully researched the history of celebrating Yoth. Forgive me.

The fact that there are instructions for making a "proper" CCC (patooey!) is disturbing. Mostly because that means that not only are they considered an acceptable form of cakery, but a suggested form. (I think this deserves a Kermit flail!) WHat has this world come to?!?


March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

i WANTED to leave a comment yesterday soooooooooooo badly but I noticed it was down...sooo here goes that kings cake was va-jazzled...

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the comentary on the CCC!

I am a little confused about Ashley's cake. why is there a bundle of fish hooks on it? Is she an angler? I is fish her fav food? Does she fish for compliments? Or something else, which is why her online name/id is being used on her cake?

Just wondering...

And a little disapointed that I can't see the comments for yesterday. I love it and went back last night to get an update and saw it removed.

Darn to heck the demons of stupidity and those that don't have a sense of humor and take things to seriosly.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSandy C also in SoFla

You know, ever since I've been reading this blog I've been trying to come up with a not-sucky, actually cool design for a CCC.

I have, as yet, failed. The closest I can think of would be something huge where each cupcake is a pixel in a grand bitmap, but really, that's not a true CCC with a slathering of icing on top.

But if I ever think of something, I'll let you know and judge me accordingly.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly

Flappy Yoth to one and all! Let's Papty Hapty!

Ashle76H reminds me of Tom Lehrer's line:

>>I am reminded at this point of a fellow I used to know whose name was Henry, only to give you an idea of what a individualist he was, he spelled it H-E-N-3-R-Y -- the three was silent, you see.<<

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

You always make me laugh! Oh my - too much fun to click on your link! Please don't ever stop! Love it!!!! (c:}

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPatty

I just noticed the names of the Wreckporters, and got another giggle.

I guess I stewed up by not seeing that before.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

For a minute I thought it said FAP FAP FAP, not fLap....

... ahem.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnnmaree

My, my, my what a busy week you've had in the comments section! Hopefully it has finally blown over! Darn, and I had a good one too regarding those "beads" that were included... ]:D

Hey, a new way to be humiliated by the wait staff at a restaurant. It combines 'happy birthday' and the chicken dance...
Flappy Birthday tooooooo youuuuuu

LOL Yoth? Next year I'll be YY.

At first I thought it dropped on the floor...further demonstrating the messiness that is a CCC (*snort*hawk-patooie!). Then I noticed it didn't and saw the knife in the background. Why should you need a knife??? *facepalm*

Poor Ashle76H. 7 hope she 6ot some n7ce 67fts.

wv: rerace: Scooby-speak for erase. If Scooby made a mistake on a cake, wouldn't rerace it, he would just eat it and start all over.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLoo-E Loo-I

Perhaps the first cake is expressing the hope for an especially rainy spring after a particularly dry winter.

wv: lazileag
I would have walked faster but I have a lazileag.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

*snicker* I had to post again because of my word verification...

ingleto. Hello, my name is Ingleto Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die!

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLoo-E Loo-I

#1 People are hoping for a rise in the water table next month. (See how I'm being non-controversial and stuff?)

#2 When someone wants a cake decorated at one minute to closing, they get a 'flappy' birthday.

#3 I know nothing about the holiday of Yoth, and certainly don't want to offend those who know everything about it, so I won't say anything.

#4 'We stewed up' left out the 'are'. As another commenter mentioned, this is graphic evidence of why we say 'patooie!' to CCCs.

#5 I also see 'congradulations', but who am I to say? Note the balloon with the squiggly tail in the upper right. Some people interpret that as a reproductive symbol. I have no idea what 'Ashle 76H' might mean. I refuse to speculate, because I might be wrong.

I hope I have restored a measure of civility to the proceedings. If you'll excuse me, I must sing to my cat.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Can anyone figure out what the first cake was supposed to say?

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterOldish Lady

This girl spells her name "Ashleigh." Replace the "i" and "g" with "7" and "6" and there you have it.
I went to college with a girl named Ashleigh and she insisted it be pronounced as two words: Ash Leigh. She would correct you if you got it wrong!
By the way, I enjoyed using lots of "apostrophes" in this "comment"!
Oh, look! Word verification! Now I get it! wv: tetshole (pronounced with a long E at the end... Tetshole is a messy CCC!

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

"flap, flap, flap" OMG that was hilarious. but darn you for making me spitting out my precious coffee.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterErica

Want to wish everyone a Flappy day! And I know I stewed up :P

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCherish

I used to worked with a girl who failed a surprise urine test. The first cake made me remember April, her marijuana, and her daily alcohol consumption immediately after getting off work at one PM.

The cake would have suited her situation so well and would have served as a reminder to study harder for those inevitable pop tests.

And just WHY was my word verification "Coftin"???

wv: Those cigarettes have a new anti-smoking warning from the government: they come packed in a coftin.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDJWildBill

It could be that Ashleigh plays some type of sport and 76 is her number. I can see some parent trying to be cute and incorporating her number into her name.... Obviously it didn't work very well, but I can totally see it happening.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

Wow, #44 could be on the cover of your next book. That's a wreck squared. (A wrecktangle?)

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

Awesome post!!

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCatstina

@ Oldish Lady:

"Get Well, April" ?

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ok, for all the whiners out there:

Breaking News: The Pity Train has just derailed at the intersection of Suck It Up & Move On and crashed into We All Have Problems before coming to a complete stop at Get the Heck Over It. Any complaints about how we operate can be forwarded to 1-800-wha-aaah with Dr. Snivel. Reporting LIVE from Quitchur Complaining!!

Jen, John, and #1, keep up the wonderful work! LOVE the smack-down post! :)


March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

7'm sorry, but 7'm totally wr7t7n6 l7ke th7s from now on.

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChocolatier

I read the "We stewed up" cake to mean "We stood up," and maybe they had the cake in their lap. /shrug

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPostmenopaws

I am also sad that there was not a place to leave comments on the last King Cake... I think it deserved some comments, the baker clearly worked hard on it, a real labia of love...

WV: theelie
The overly sensitive comments about the King Cakes were pretty theelie...

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

I too am a grocery store cake decorator, tho I haven't always been and I hope to God I will not be forever. You CAN make pretty, non-icing-covered CCCs. I have proof if you want pictures. You really NEED a tiny dollop of something to secure those cupcakes or they are gonna slide off the board and ruin little Suzi's party... other than that it's not that HARD to smooth everything over and create something pretty. (Rainee)

March 10, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRainee

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