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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
May242011

Giving Wrecks a Bad Name

Parents, if you don't want to risk bruised feelings on their birthdays, I suggest you NOT name any of your children "Cubby":


Or "Angus":

("Why, I declare, I didn't know it was the Colonel's birthday!")

Or "Ritchie":

And don't even *think* about "Bobby":

(Got milk?)

Or, heaven forbid, "Trudi":

And while you're at it, you'd better avoid pet names like "honey bunny," too:



In fact, maybe you should just leave names off your cakes all together. That way, nothing can go wrong.

I rest my case.

Thanks to wreckporters Laura R., Lacey C., Trisha A., Brian C., Kirsten H., Kelly N., & Erica for the name-calling.

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Reader Comments (75)

As an atheist, I have requested that the last cake be served at my funeral.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

From now on before I shoot someone (in video games of course ) I will say good by bitchie go to the worm infested nothingnes of the 7th cake !

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterninja dude 12

Ha Ha. Such nice penmanship and flowers on some of those too.

WV: ingsted
All happily ingsted those wreckified cakes. Looks bad, but tastes good (hopefully).

cc

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

They asked for "nothing" and obviously received it in abundance! Great customer service!

wv:vangiona - lady parts

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

@ donna - yeah for the rocky horror reference!

WV: homigh: OMG phonetically with an accent

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Actually, I think Angus got lucky with Ingus...I was quite sure they were going to leave the G out of that name....

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterChristina Wilsdon

Ha! Good SNL reference... one of my favorite Christopher Walken skits :)

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Looks like a couple of good ol' fashioned Freudian slips... I wonder what the Wreckerators for the "Chubby" and "Booby" cakes were thinking about...

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Given the plops of poop-like frosting on Turdi's cake, not to mention what could be fecal spray on the left of the cake, well, maybe this really is for Turdi.....

wv-arsta: a cake decorator who specializes in this type of decoration

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I was never so embarassed in my LIFE than the time we went to the Red Lobster in Atlanta, GA when I was a teenager. My maiden name is "FUSCO". Please to not the relative positions of the "S" and the "C". When our name hadn't been called after 45 minutes of waiting and some extremely uncomfortable stares by the hostesses, I was the one relegated to the task of finding out just what the wait was all about. Can you guess why they didn't call our name over the loudspeaker? Anyone? Bueller?
Because they had written it down FU*C*S*O. And they were afraid to try and pronounce it.

I'm so glad my last name is Suluh. Because that's a HARD one to screw up. Unless you're a travel agent in the post 9/11 world and you enter it as "Sul*A*h". Which is why I tell people "Like the dude on Star Trek. SULU. SOO LOO".

Signed,
The girl who is suck a Trek Geek that she married Suluh.

wv: adamm

Mispronouncing and misspelling my last names has been adamm problem my whole life.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterThe Empress Nina

The booby cake... is that cupcake...on a cake?

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLidi Di

Tee Hee Happy Birthday Chubby.... NICE!!!!

WV: sleuts, the heavier version of a slut *shrugs shoulders*

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNo Cake Fo' You!!!

LMAO - One of the greatest SNL skits of all time :) Like someone else said - changing the 'a' to 'i' is MUCH better than forgetting the 'g'!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterErin Kelly

My parents, in an excess of giddiness at their first child AND having watched far too many Flintstones cartoons, used to call me "Grand Royal Purple Pooh-Bah". However, for most of my life, they shortened that to "Pooh-Bah", "Pooh-Bear" (getting their cartoons mixed up), or just "Pooh". Even as a grown woman, I STILL answer to this. I shudder to think what these people would do with such a nickname.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSara T Petersen

Colonel Ingus!?! Love it, glad I had finished my coffee for the morning!

wv: ringie...my ears are a little ringie after all that turdi icing

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMomcat

Ahehehe good god some people are dumb

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Macgyver's first name is Angus. Does that outweigh the risks and general non-coolness of the name? 'Cause I think it might...

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterelissa

The flowers are so and writing are well done. Someone is very talented.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertiny p. elephant

Nothing still gets me. :p

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAdorably Dead

mmmmmmmmmmmmm...seems like birthday cakes with a loads of chocolate and crunch.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSticker Printing

Ritchie's cake scares me. :-S

*whispering* with all those squiggly lines and shaky writing, it looks a little crazy. And the way it's saying "Good Bye", it's just creepy....

Andrea

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Not that Turdl isn't a fabulous wrekkie, but it is just possibly a misspelling of the name Trudl, a rather Germanic version of N. American "Trudy"....or not...

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermizdarlin

Make me laugh! omg ... too funny!
Got milk??? hahahahahahahahahaha

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterPattyMadeIt

Please someone tell me what WV: (random misspelled word) refers to! Please and spanks you! :-)

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Loved how the "Turdi" cake has the little balls of poo on it!
I mean WOW it really got the "point" across!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBlessed Rain

That was pretty damn funny!!!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterConnie Moreno

@ ninja dude - very appropriate and funny.

I'm starting to wonder if these cakes aren't being made intentionally. If not, I apologize to bitchie and booby if I hurt their feelings.

:)

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hahaha!! Colonel Angus - One of the greatest SNL skits of all time! 10 points for Jen!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCate

My cat's name was Cubby... I guess this is why kitties don't celebrate with cake.

wv: peadis- man parts!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@ mizdarlin - I thought the point was that someone had misspelled "Trudi" with most unfortunate (except for us Wreck lovers) consequences . . .

And speaking of that cake, your warnings are a little too late: my brand new neice has been saddled with the name Trudi. At least it's a middle name, or that poor girl would be facing being called "Turdi" from second grade through middle school. If only this post had been up a week ago!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

At least "Angus" didn't have the "g" dropped....

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGreg

Hilarious. Thanks for the laugh. The literally out-loud laugh.

wv: digno
I digno you named your little girl Turdi!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNan

Haaa!! How funny these are!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNina

@ Anon: "Please someone tell me what WV: (random misspelled word) refers to! Please and spanks you! :-)"

WV is for Word Verify, the funky little words we have to type in to comment. People are using 'em to be cute/witty.

WV: materiss - When talking about a Wreck, what materiss how much it makes you laugh. Today, lots.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBeverly Diehl

@ Anonymous, wv is word verification. It's the little code word you have to type in to prove that you are human when you comment.

wv: munthri.
A munthri two ago, I didn't know what wv was, either.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterNan

Test.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGary

This must be Trudi's turdief birfday.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterGary

This reminds me of the whole "Ashlynn" somehow became "Asslynn" debacle.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEbuck

LOLOLOL @ Colonel Ingus. I love Rachel Dratch.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBrie

Oh, I'm so sending today's post to my aunt Trudi! (Yes, I'm evil).

As for "Richie", "Cubby", and "Bobby" I'm wondering... was that a true accident, or was this another case of "innocently" hinting (as with Jenn marring Troy the other week). This may explain why Cubby's cake is only a lame cookie. So if he chows down on the whole thing, it's not as caloric as eating a big slab cake!

And if honey bunny's hubby's horny, that cake makes perfect sense ;)

PS Empress Nina... I can totally relate. Pretty much anyone who's Mother Tongue is English can't pronounce (or spell) my name. The worst mis-spelling was when they got just one letter right (the "l")!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

@ninja dude 12, you made my day. I NEED a "Go to the worm infested nothingness of the 7th cake!" t-shirt.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

Anonymous- As to WV... for the first few months, I thought it was some hillbilly thing, the way they spelled and pronounced things in West Virginia. It was nice to catch on.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAmy from Nashville

Such a great post (as always)! Made me almost pee my pants!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMicalah

I have a similar cake mishap from my childhood.

It was my sister's birthday. Her name is Brett.

What was on the cake?

Happy Birthday Brat!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Love the got milk line!!!!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKaren C

Kudos for the Colonel Ingus reference!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBabsiegirl

This totally made my day, thanks!!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

This post completely made my day. Especially that "Ingus" comment.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

As we ponder a name for our child I will now see if it can result in a cake wreck!!

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love a random SNL reference.

May 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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