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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Sunday
Jul032011

Sunday Sweets: The "Eh" Team

Today we've decided to feature some amazing cakes in honor of Canada Day, which was Friday.

"But, john the hubby of Jen!" you say, "The fourth of July is tomorrow! We need cakes with American flags! And American things! And...you know...America!"

Well, tough. We've picked on Canada enough over the years, and they deserve at least one day of Sweets for putting up with us.

Plus we used up our best American cakes for Memorial Day.

But mostly that first thing.

Er, before we proceed, I think I should mention that Jen & I have logged many, many hours into determining the least offensive, least stereotypical way to write today's post.

Then we gave up and just wrote what we wanted anyway. Sorry. As Craig Ferguson would say, "I look forward to your letters."

Let's start with some sweet Canadian flags:


Perfection. And after looking at hundreds of Canadian flag cakes, I can say with complete confidence that the maple leaf is officially the hardest thing in the world to draw accurately.

You might think I'll be posting a moose cake next. BUT YOU WOULD BE WRONG.

By Cake Central member krazyb5

Check out that shading! Such great perspective - and almost completely fondant-free.

Plus, from my extensive research I now know that there are almost twice as many black bears in Canada as there are in the U.S. I can also tell you Canada's gross national product and the top five cleanest cities, but Jen tells me that would be "boring as snot," so I guess I won't now.

And...uh...here's a beaver cake:

By The Femme Fondants

Stereotypical? Yes.

Freakin' adorable? ALSO yes.

Now how's about a little Canadian landmarkage?

By Bobbette and Belle

That is the CN Tower. It's 1,815.4 feet - or 553.33 meters - tall and weighs 118,000 tonnes.

So I'm not sure those people are to scale.

These cute crustaceans, either:


Obviously this post wouldn't be complete without a cake representing Canada's national winter sport:

By Cake Central member sugar-2

Hockey! Or as my French-Canadian dad calls it, 'ockey!

That's their Olympic jersey, too. Pretty sweet.

Speaking of sports, are you ready to have your mind blown?


It turns out that basketball was invented by a Canadian. Which is why *I* only root for the Raptors. When I watch basketball, I mean. (Which is never.)

Oh, and do you see that texture?


The decorator made each tiny little divot with a #2 icing tip. A. Mazing.

Here's something else uniquely Canadian:



Tim Hortons!

Okay, so there are also some in Ohio, but that's almost Canada anyway, right?

Besides, we couldn't find any cakes of poutine, tuques, or adorable accents.

Then there's Canada's other beverage of choice:


Beer! (In a tree!)

And get this: those beer bottles and "ice" are molded hard candy. Even the melted bits on the board! I'm amazed. Definitely one of the most convincing bottle cakes I've ever seen.

What's that? You want a little Canadian history? Ok, how's this: did you know that Louis Jolliet (a Canadian) was the first explorer to map the Mississippi river?

By Pink Cake Box

Is it too much to hope the map layer is made of Mississippi mud cake?

And so, in conclusion, I'm sorry I couldn't find a Barenaked Ladies/Nathan Fillion mash-up cake, since I'm told that many of you believe a Barenaked Fillion would make your entire year.

However...

Haven't you always wanted a monkey?


If I had a million dollars...I'd buy, like, ten of these cakes.

Happy Belated Canada Day, Canada! Thanks for being the most polite, fun-loving, and best sense-of-humor-having readers we could ask for.

Have a Sweet to nominate? Then send it to Sunday Sweets [at] Cake Wrecks [dot] com.

« Go Fourth and Celebrate! | Main | Big Bangs »

Reader Comments (187)

If/when I get married, I want a cake with 3 tiers covered in that map from the bottom of the luggage cake. Totally amazing!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatie (Kali)

James Naismith may have been Canadian (and I'm not disparaging is heritage at all) and the Canadian claim to a portion of basketball history is strong, but the development of the game of basketball is fully American. Naismith developed the 13 original basic rules of basketball while working at the International YMCA Training School in Springfield, MA in 1891 (needing a sport the boys could play indoors during the cold winter months). Naismith later moved to Kansas, where he founded the basketball program at the University of Kansas (K-State) and later became the Athletic Director. (Naismith Hall is named after him.) - (Can you tell I'm from the Kansas City area?)

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDotRot

Beaver, made of cute,
sat on his little patoot.
That's what it's aboot!

wv: istio

IsTio Pedro still fixing computers? I ask becauseTia Rosa noticedthe spacebarisn't working.

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Bob & Doug McKenzie reference = awesome. Excellent post.

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterColleen C

These cakes were amazing and lovely! Now I want to go to Canada!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterM. Giles

Love it! And yes those maple leaves are very hard to draw, those cookies are fantastic!

Thanks for honouring Canada on the weekend of our 144th birthday! Happy Independence Day to you!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterEstelle

Canada has a town called "Vulcan", so...just...yeah. :) With Star Trek landmarks and stuff. Yep.
-ei

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love it - the post was "spot on"...no offense taken anywhere. Thanks for honouring our day - hope your 4th is a great celebration, too. Just to let you know - the Tim's south of the border are no where as good as the ones we have- I think it's a Canadian thing ;)

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjoyfullyyours

Awesome post eh :)

I do have to tell you that your beaver cake is actually a Beaver cake - Beavers are Canadian 'boy scouts' aged 5 - 7.

http://www.scouts.ca/dnn/youth/BeaverScouts/tabid/2132/Default.aspx

(And PS - most Canadians don't give a hoot about basketball, yay Naismith was Canadian, whatever, bring on the HOCKEY!)

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterValerie

Great cakes and comments (and I am a Canadian). The beaver cake does remind me of an old joke though or pick up line depending on your whereaboots... "Hey... if you're Canadian, show me your beaver". Yeah... we have those guys here too...

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

Instead of a cake that looks like a tuque, how about a tuque that looks like a (cup)cake?

http://bakestarwarsforme.blogspot.com/2010/11/cupcake-tuque.html

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKim

I loved this post! I went around on Canada Day telling all my (American) friends "Happy Canada Day" so much fun. Anyway...loved the cakes. Not offended at all by the post! It's quite halarious (I can say this because I'm from OH and am practically Canadian anyway.)

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterShaen

Hurray for BNL references! I'd love to see them in cake!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterErin

Totally awesome post for our totally awesome country... So since you love us so much can we expect a stop on your book tour, hmm? Please? Or even one that is close, like Buffalo?

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommentermommytotwoE's

MMMmm barenaked Fillion...

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterFoodycat

Thanks eh, for honouring us! I know I'm far from the only one up here who's wishing you a super 4th of July tomorrow.

(And even if you did offend us, we'd be the ones apologizing to you!)

Sharon

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Woohhoo! I am Canadian (eh!) and this is my second time being a Sunday sweetie!!!! I am honored that you have honored us (I mean me mostly) again!!! Thank you!!!
-lisachick. Aka one of the Femmefondants. :)

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

How cute

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

TIMMIES!!! Tim Horton's is a oft-visited destination when I visit my friends in Ontario. In fact, I'm headed up in 22 days, not that I'm counting or anything... >.>

Wonderful, beautiful, awesome cakes. Those beer bottles are amazing! And the cover art from 3DG's Life Starts Now would make a great cake for someone who likes to paint with food coloring... Anyone?

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterWendy

Love today's Sweets! One other AWESOME Canadian item is insulin, without which my dear daughter would not be here. Thanks to Drs. Banting and Best! I tried to find a cake that looks like an insulin bottle, but only found these cake pops. I know how you feel about CCC (patooie), but how do you feel about cake pops? http://sixuntilme.com/blog2/2011/06/novolog_cake_pops_badassery.html#comments

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBeth

I am at work and couldn't resist the urge to blurt "Haven't you always wanted a monKEY?"...stares at me to say the least...hehe

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBeth

I'd love a double double cake- what could be more Canadian- except maybe a 2-4 cake.

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterkissychick

Awesome to see some very high quality cakes. I had to look twice at the beer bottle cake -- I honestly thought it was real!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDoughball

I can't get over how the beaver is positioned on that cake. The dam isn't incredibly prominent, and it just kinda looks like the beaver is in some way 'producing' the river. =\

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterElaine

Poutine Cake...and yes, it looks discusting but that's what makes it so authentic looking :)

http://poutinechronicles.blogspot.com/2009/11/faux-poutine-cake.html

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh man, the Timmy's cake! No Timmy's where I live :( That damn maple leaf was the bane of my existence in every social studies/history/geography class in school. The ones done here are absolute perfection. Great post :D

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTriGirl

As a (displaced to Arkansas) Canadian, I am definitely NOT offended, eh!!
Also, I miss Timmies... :*( So much so that I am willing to blow the family budget to order cans of Timmy's coffee from Amazon.com. :)

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Love the Tim Horton's cake. Lots of Timmies in Western New York too! We have one on almost every corner.

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

What about this Timbits cake?!

http://nationalpost.tumblr.com/post/6561709530/timbits-turn-35-five-photos-tangentially-related

You should also give a nod to the greatest Canadian invention, Beaver Tails, which are like elephant ears with awesome toppings:

http://www.beavertailsinc.com/

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersopraffina

The beaver with the tent is wearing a Scouts Canada Beaver uniform. For the Americans on the list, Beavers is the Canadian version of Tiger Cubs.

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Lovely! Thanks for a wonderful post on Canada!

Just saw a bit about Cake Wrecks on The Graham Norton Show!!! :D:D:D

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDings

@DotRot - I'm afraid you have mistaken your history somewhat, since you have mistakenly identified the University of Kansas as K-State. K-State is Kansas State University, a different kettle of fish altogether.

Barenaked Fillion - I am so there!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKansas Girl

Sorry, John, but Mellie is as correct as you are; basketball was invented BY a Canadian (Dr. James Naismith), but he invented it IN Springfield, Massachusetts.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Naismith

That is why the Basketball Hall of Fame is located in Springfield.

That bit of nitpicking aside, great job on the Canada Day post--love all the cakes!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJade

Love the fact that you highlighted Canada and Canadians with this post! We all love our time in the sun!

Speaking of poutine, i have friends visiting Montreal this week posting pics of their poutine adventures and all I could do was raise a Timmies toast to them and their culinary delights!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKnittinchick

The maple leaf is indeed the hardest thing in the world to draw accurately. Every Canadian knows this. :)

Also, that Timmies cake was awesome. Well, they all were, but … Timmies!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnassa

I know you did not just compare Ohio to Canada...

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterTracey

Aw, now I'm homesick! Those were awesome cakes.

Also, I need Tim Hortons now. NOW. Dangit.

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMikki Black

I wept at no Barenaked Fillion cake. :(

However, the 'ockey jersey and basketball cakes were superb...were they decorated by Canadians? Were any of them? Hmmmm, might have been a good way to go: here's some random, awesome cakes decorated north of the border! (in a tree)

-Barbara Anne

P.S. I still think beaver, beaver and dam Beiber would have been hysterical!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

As a proud Canadian, thanks. That was awesome.

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterS. Andrea Milne

Michigan is full of Tim Hortons now, too! Of course, we are also almost Canada..

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLarc

Thanks, eh? That was pretty awesome. Especially since you threw in a reference to one of my favourite Christmas songs. :)

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

I think best pun of the day goes to my three-year-old, who, upon seeing the Tim Horton's cake, asked saucily, "Is that a cup-cake?"

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCount Mockula

That basketball cake? BLEW MY MIND. Wow. And TIm Horton's! I totally suggested that in my Epbot comment (along with hundreds of others, I'm sure)!

And, if people don't like your sense of humor... why are they reading the blog?

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMegan M.

"I'm told that many of you believe a Barenaked Fillion would make your entire year."

Mmm, Capt'n tightpants.

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

THIS Canadian says great post and great cakes, as always!
To all you Americans out there, by the way, happy Independence Day!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thanks for loving us Canucks! Great post and not offended at all!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterParonomaniac

Gaaahhh!! Bob & Doug! I love you guys so much more for that!!! The cakes are pretty cool too, I guess :)

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Never realized how difficult that Maple Leaf was to draw until I moved out of the country and tried to draw it for somebody.

"Sweet" of you to feature your northern neighbours like this!!

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hockey, "their national winter sport"--&@$! THAT! As you might be aware, the Stanley Cup Playoffs just concluded. If my Canadian friends are typical (and I have reason to believe they are), it's more like a national obsession. Vancouver RIOTED after the concluding game. Hockey fans get scary.

July 3, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

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