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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Nov052012

Pan-Demonium

Today's post is a little different, and doesn't quite fit my standard definition of a wreck - but it's just too darn funny not to share. 

Today's post is also probably NSFW, and unless you want some really uncomfortable discussions with your children, NSFK, either.

So, assuming you're at home and have no kids around, YOU MAY PROCEED.

 *****

 

In the spirit of Pan-Tastic, we here at CW want you to get the most mileage out of your shaped cake pans. To that end, allow us to present....er, this:

 IT'S A LIGHTHOUSE.

Juuuuust a lighthouse.

 ("Be a beacon?!") 

(If you get that reference, I will personally award you one million geek points.)

 

And also this:

Old Macdonald had a farm.

 Which was clearly compensating for something.

 

Of course, your pan may be a slightly different model, so there's also this option:

Those pesky UFOs - always taking off to the right.

 

Or this:

I'm coocoo for COCONUTS!

(Coconuts. Seriously. THESE JOKES WRITE THEMSELVES.)

 

By now I'm sure you're wondering where all these brilliant designs came from. Well, would you believe there's a whole website dedicated to finding alternative uses for that most distinctive of shaped cake pans? 'Cuz there is, and I think you'll agree that blogger/baker Holly is a veritable WIZARD at making me bust a gut laughing:

 You'll never hear a reference to Mr. Wizard the same way again.


And here's one final option, spotted at an actual baby shower:

There's something ironic about using this particular pan for a baby shower cake. Or is it appropriate? Ironically appropriate? Whatever. IT'S FUNNY.


My thanks to Thomas S., whoever it was that originally sent me the link to Holly's site, and the rest of you for not yelling at me in the comments about how these aren't professional or at ALL appropriate. I KNOW.

But to be fair, neither am I. ;)

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Reader Comments (81)

"I'm Carl"
"I'm Mary"
"I'm going to be sick!"

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNick

Old MacDonald had a farm
E-I-E-I.... ohhhhhhh.

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKhymera

"I was going to join the NSA, but they found out my parents were married." LOOOOOOVE Sneakers!!!!!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAlison

BWAHAHAHA, you gave this Sandy victim some needed LOL's :D Sharyn and Haiku joy thanks for the major giggles XD

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Way too late to grab the Sneakers, points, but satisfied to see someone else make a "Death to Smoochy." joke.

Well done, all.

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnaxphone

I've always wondered what people do with those pans. I actually have an angel one that I've used exactly one time. Apparently I'm not creative enough to come up with something else it could be. But you know what? After seeing todays post, I'm totally ok with that...
Sharyn, mel and Haiku Joy ~ Awesome as always!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJodee in WA

Ummm...I don't wanna mess up all the good times ...(*ahem*)...but I do believe that space-ship is going to the left?!! {It pays to vary your take-off patterns so you don't accidentally veer into something...}

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermckapet

Everybody beat me to squeeing over your Sneakers reference (g*dd*mn it, Whistler!), but I can't believe the wizard didn't get a Magical Trevor joke!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAlisa

For the one post I didn't get to read, I was a shoe-in for the geek points. One of my all time favorite movies. Setec Astronomy? Yeah, I got a better one... Cooty Rats Semen. Ha!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterfobofobiac

And I thought I was the only one who ever watched that movie....

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTammyLee

Sneakers FTW!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered Commentersilre

Okay, I'm old and never memorized movie lines, but it WAS familiar, so I *hangs head in shame* looked it up. One of the best movies EVER.

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterleslie (crookedstamper)

Yesssssss. Sneakers!! So funny!!! I have to ask- so... there is a PENIS cake mold somewhere, and these bakers aaaaaaalllllll have them???? they sure don't have it at walmart!!!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

And today is the 20th anniversary of Sneakers. They're having a big to do at the Egyptian in L.A. this weekend.

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBeth

I don't know about you, but I believe this cake pan dates back to the mid sixties in honor of the TV show "I Dream of Jeannie". It is quite obvious that people wanted to bake "I Dream of Jeannie" bottle cakes. It's obvious, right?????? (snicker snicker snicker)

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterChris

Bwahahahahaha! I'm glad you posted this... it showed up in my inbox today. I thought of you immediately! Of course I didn't need to send it to you!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRainyday

"I didn't know you could do THAT in Mexico City."

<3 <3 <3 I adore you forever for referencing one of my all-time favorite movies!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterVixy

I know what "Be a Beacon??" is from!! One of my favorite movies, Sneakers!!!! I love it, love it, love it!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

Come on, nobody has said "I put on my robe and wizard hat" yet about the wizard one?

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterERBusbee

@BADKarma *whew* I thought exactly the same thing when I first glimpsed this post.

In fact, knowing I would not have a single thing to say about this that wouldn't be bawdy, I just went back to yesterday to read the comments I'd missed. Came back, read this one and realized I will never be mature enough to comment on this post. Frankly, I'm okay with that. ;)

@Chris now, there's one I never thought of but fits perfectly! That would actually be fun to recreate Jeannie's bottle (which I first misspelled as "booty-le").

@Savanna thank you for quoting my favorite line- I would have given out my phone number, too!

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

@Khymera: LOL !!! You made me bark on that one. I don't think I will ever sing Old MacDonald again without smirking. Thanks...I think.

November 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterChris

The crazy thing is- I adore Sneakers. I recognize the quotes from the comments but not the one from the post.

November 6, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterlissanee

Sneakers! One of my favorite movies!

November 6, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

I didn't know "those kinds" of pans existed!!

BTW, I found myself laughing at madtigerkitty's post :

Thank you for the all the tips on how to use our new favorite pan ;)


Thank you for all the TIPS? Snort, snicker, ROFL....

November 7, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJoanie

Jen, I just watched "Sneakers" over the weekend because I needed a fun movie. "Be a beacon! Give him h---."

November 7, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterbridgie

Okay. I've been reading this site for years, never commenting. Not when you made an obscure reference to Ghostbusters 2 (might have even been the soundtrack, I don't remember exactly now). Not when you quoted the street urchins from the Scrooge musical (which I totally thought was what you were doing but didn't post anything because I was sure only my family watches that ever year). But now you pull out "Be a beacon" right when my friend and I were working out the next scheduled viewing of that classic film just to catch our friends up on "epic movies you have to see".

It's official. We're bonded soul geek sisters or something. I'd have stopped reading long ago (because ever time I do I want to eat cake) if it hadn't been for your completely obscure-yet-familiar references.

Well, that's all I had. Never thought the reformed adult cake pan thread would be where I posted first, but there ya go!

November 12, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJen G.

SNEAKERS. Oh good lord you get to share my geek points because I NEVER hear anybody quote that and it is an amazing movie.

Also, wtf all these bakers. XD Do they seriously try to pass these things off as not actually suggestive? Nice.

November 12, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPockyPuck

That was hysterical. I have been sitting here on the couch showing my hubby the pics, and crying with laughter. Thankyou for making my day! :)

November 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

I'm quite literally crying as I laugh at these photos! You made my night!

November 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBellaFlor

Well... clicking on Holly's link led me to click on OTHER links from her page and now I REALLY WANNA HAVE A BACHELORETTE PARTY!! Really really reallllly bad. Any takers? :D heeheehee Too dern funny. I thought at the beginning of this post "Hmm. No. Thats not a... Oh wait. YES IT IS!" Thanks Jen and thoJ for rising above and beyond....<giggle> in your pursuit of edible humor ~air high five~

November 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterStacyH

I think Holly's missing one...not only can you make a rocket, you can also make a space shuttle w/out too much trouble. See, the pan gives you the fuselage & the engines, so all you need to add is a tail fin on top (small right triangle) and a wing on each side (large right triangle) and then, voila! You have your space shuttle w/retracted landing gear as appropriate for orbiting the earth. Slap it atop a night-sky sheet cake filled w/ stars & the moon and admire your creation! :-)

(Can you tell I grew up @ Johnson Space Center in Houston?! I spent my childhood playing hide-n-seek among ancient vacuum-tube filled computers from the 60s that used punch cards & reel-to-reel tape for instructions & data recording, respectively. And I flew the shuttle simulator a few times to boot. Always landed on the runaway...right after I crashed a couple of buildings first...:-) (danged crosswinds!)

December 18, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

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