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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Apr202012

Cake Wrecks Gets the Munchies

"Dude! Did you know that today is, like, International Pot Day?"

"Whoa, righteous! But...I thought that was every day."

"Well, sure, for hoopy froods like us, but today it's, like, totally legal and stuff!"*

"No way!"

"Way!"

"Dude. Wait'll we tell the boss."

 

[Later]

 

"Ok, check it: The mighty Zorro, being stalked by a giant Mars rock, faces off against the evil Christmas present of Doom!"

"Da... na... naaaah!"

 

"Awwwwesome. And look: It's a bird, it's a plane, it's...Pooperman!"

"Haha! Naasty!" [high-fiving]

"Uh-oh, dude... I think I got some food coloring up my no...

AAAAAPLOOOIEEE!!"

"Oops. Aw, man... that's not right.

[looking at cake]

We should name it."

"Ooh, I got this! Wait. Wait. Wait. Waitwaitwaitwait. We should call it...um...

"What were we talking about?"

 

"Chad! Todd! How are those animal cakes coming back there? We've got a cupcake cake quota to fill!"

"Uh...We'll get right on it, Mr. Nerfburgler!"

[whispering] "Dude. I just realized: Mr. Nerfburgler's name...IS MR. NERFBURGLER."

"BWAHHAHAHAHAA!"

[Four hours later]

"Ok. Check it out. I made a giraffe:"

"Gnarly."

 

"And here's my totally righteous seagull!"

"Compadré, you inspire me."

 

"And, dude, how do you like my two-headed Decepticon?"

[gasping] "With the laser-guided scorpion tail and optional water-mode inflatables?!"

"OF COURSE."

"I am, like, SO not worthy."

"Ah, but that's nothing, my good dude. Are you ready for the best cake OF. ALL. TIME?!

 

"Preeeeesenting: Donatello, of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!

"After a Shredder shredding, of course"

"Whoa!"

"Yeah!"

"Whoa!"

"Yeah!"

[pause]

"Dude, I am seriously jonesing for some snackage. What say we make some cupcakes for the display case now?"

"So with you, dude."

 

Thanks to Jacquie B., Moriah V., Amber, Sarah L., Adrienne K., Tracy M., Casey L., and Caryol B., who all know that it is definitely NOT legal to do drugs today or any day, and that most of what we post here on Cake Wrecks probably was NOT made by stoners. Which, if you think about it, is actually a lot MORE disturbing.

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Reader Comments (114)

Those people saying they'd at least taste the Mountain Dew and Dorito cupcakes makes me wonder if Sunshine Mary is still around...

April 22, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJo

Wow, I don't know what's scarier- the concept of Mountain Dew+Dorito cupcakes, or someone actually buying them. There are some excellent salty and sweet combos (pretzels and chocolate, anyone? Mmmmm) But... this? No. Just... no. Funny thing is I can imagine Mountain Dew cupcakes. I've heard of Coke and even Seven Up cakes, so why not. Just no artificial cheese stuff.

April 22, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAprilK

I don't know about a stoner not being able to make a decent cake - I'm pretty sure the mountain dew and doritos cupcakes were at least stoner inspred. Sometimes the munchies can inspire culinary creativity ;)

April 22, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterPammythebear

Saddly I stood in a line for a concert this weekend and all the high school and college students around me talked just like this. If I had a dime for every time I heard "awesome' and "stoked".

April 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTed C

Mountain. Dew. And. Dorito. Cupcakes.

Wow.

That is either pure genius or the most disgusting thing EVER. But I'm not going to find out.

April 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

Dear Ranger,

Ok, yeah, I guess it could be Wesley from Princess-Bride (if you ignore the cape)....still need the princess, 2 rock 'chairs', a rock table, and 2 goblets & the Sicilian and...some Iocane powder... :-)

April 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

...It really says something about me that it took a couple of seconds of blank staring at the "legal" bit before I realized that the "pot" in question was not, in fact, a cooking utensil. I spent a moment wondering why on earth there would be a pot [the cooking utensil] appreciation day...I mean, wouldn't the frying pan get jealous?

Also: Seagull? Did anyone else see that and go "That is clearly a brontosaurus"?

April 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAmelia Bedelia

You used Hoopy Froods. I thought my respect and awe for you could get no higher than the Dalek wedding cake. And then you used Hoopy Froods.

YOU ARE SO COOL.

April 24, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterParanoid Android

I can't stop laughing. This is some of the funniest commentary I've read in a while! Thanks for the laughs, Jen!

April 25, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

just saw these bit behind in my wreck reading showed them to others who agree the mt dew things are wrong

April 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterkirathetimelady

Don't they know that the Mountain Dew plus Dorito combination makes your mouth taste like a zoo smells? I know this from personal experience in high school. Ah, lost youth.

April 29, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJan C.

@Scifimom - I also heard Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure in my head, with overtones of the stoner guy who sat next to me in High School.

@Sharyn - Love the Hitch-hiker's Guide references.

The trouble with sneaking onto Cakewrecks at work (even during breaktime) is that I always end up trying to muffle guffaws of laughter and/or hide tears of laughter while hoping the phone does not ring.

May 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCatTrampoline

Is it wrong that I was imagining a young Keanu Reeves giving the commentary? And then expected Ghengis Khan, Abraham Lincoln, Sigmund Freud, and Aristotle to come in and save the wrecks? Duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude.

July 3, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterErin H

is it just me or did that sound like Bill and Ted :)

October 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAddi

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