My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Great Expectations

It's been a while since we compared the pictures in the order book to what you actually get from a bakery, so let's mosey on through those rose gardens of hope into the harsh, sweat-stained armpits of reality, shall we?


What you order:

What you get:

What, no toy? I'd say you got burned, Gabe, but it looks more like you got ketchup-smeared.



What you order:

What you get:

I've seen worse.


What you order:

What you get:

This is worse.


Ever wonder what happens when the cake you want requires airbrushing, and the bakery doesn't have an airbrush?

What you order:

What you get:

And they said you'd never use those finger-painting skills in "the real world." Ha! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to check on my paper cup Lima bean garden...


What you order:

What you get:

Let's just hope it's not contagious.


Thanks to Adina W., Koutny L., Desiree B., Jill W., & Shelly R. for helping inspire my new band name: El Festering Pustulés. It really POPS, don't you think?

(Fun fact: Shelly R. paid $80 for that Dora cake. Eighty. Dollars.)

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Reader Comments (61)

@Craig: Apology accepted. Now come rescue me from Theardare!! If I hear Manilow singing "The Pina Colada Song" one more time, I'm gonna puke all over!

(desparately tries to undo the locks on multiple chains using a bent hair pin while Manilow plays YET AGAIN in the background... )

"I write the songs the young girls sing..." AAAAAAIIIIGGGGGHHHHH!!!!! MAKE IT STOP!!!! MAKE IT STOP!!!!! (I'm only a brown belt; I never learned how to defy acoustic torture.)

AAAIIIGGGHHHH!!! I'LL CHANGE YOUR LITTERBOX EVERY DAY!! FRESH KIBBLES & CREAM FOR DINNER EVERY NIGHT!!!! (whimpering...) Please, Theardare, please turn off the music, please...(sniffle, sniffle, murmured crying...)

June 12, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

paper cup lima bean garden


June 12, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAnon

@KarateLady -- Scratch him behind the left ear, it's always itchy!!! That usually mellows him right out.

June 12, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

You may have been able to brainwash my mom, Theadare, but you neglected to brainwash me! Which is why I have sent my Ninja assassin kitties to make you listen to the PiƱa Colada song! *cell phone rings* Oh! I just received a text message from my assassins Spot & Stash! They have captured your sister Theadarea! But don't worry, she will be given as much TLC as possible! You really shouldn't leave your family unguarded and untrained, Theadare.....

June 12, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady's Daughter

Theardare -- what are you doing, tabby man?! KarateLady is our friend and fellow DOC-er. Only wrecks and people who think weekday cakes aren't wrecks, remember? I paid the dues on that. And people who question Jen / John's patriotism / competence / caring / overall awesomeness. Mustn't forget that CATergory.

Look, there are some wrecks that need taking out in the next post! There's a good boy. Run along, now...

All better now? At least he didn't unleash Celine on you. I always find that what does not kill me makes me, stronger.

June 12, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

After 2 years and bakers still can't copy that Transformer cake, it was featured in June of 2009 here:


June 13, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBuffy

I dunno, personally I think the Tron cake is worse than the Tiana cake. Sure, the pond's messy, and I don't know what's up with the random sprinkles, but at least it's not supposed to have any straight lines. The Tron cake couldn't even manage to get the sides of the CAKE straight, much less the frosting! And what's with the brown? There's nothing brown in Tron! *coughs and steps off her soapbox*

June 14, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKay Qy

I actually gasped when I saw Dora. My son asked if I was okay.... I said.... "yea baby, I'm okay, I don't think Dora is though...." He just turned around and walked away - good thing I wasn't truly hurt. ;)

June 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterEm

Thanks for including my daughter's Tiana birthday cake! A fun fact - when we picked up the cake, Tiana was face first into her swamp. The picture is after they tried to "repair" her. Not to mention - never did I ask for sprinkles!

I guess I should be happy they spelled everything correctly.

June 15, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDesiree B

What people fail to recognize is that most of these cakes are done by grocery store cake decorators. They aren't professionals by any means and actually don't get that much training. Also it isn't as easy as it looks or you wouldn't pay people to do it for you. Yes I know this because I am a cake decorator at grocery store. A lot of the character cakes we have to do we don't have the right colors so we have to make the best with what we have.

July 5, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCrissy

Don't be such a sourpuss, Crissy! (or should it be sourpussy? ;-) (Yeah, I'm a year late - so sue, no, not you, Theardare - you go after Crissy! Yes, that's a good kitty! I'll go pour your cream & get your kibbles out right now... :-)

July 18, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

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