Ok, new plan:
Continue avoiding eye contact and hope for the best.
Am I seeing things, or are those twist ties sticking out of Groucho's neck?
And are these ... mandibles?
I don't know what it is, but I like how you can almost hear it screaming.
What, you again?
YOU SPIT PETER OUT THIS INSTANT!
You just don't see enough anthropomorphic fire hydrant cakes these days.
Am I right, or am I right?
WONDER NO MORE.
(I'm afraid to ask what those ears are made of, so let's just call them what they look like: rawhide pig ears dipped in white chocolate. Thereby making plastic sound a MILLION times more appetizing.)
Now, I know you've all been wondering, so I'm happy to report that I've finally figured it out:
THIS IS WHAT'S WRONG WITH AMERICA.
Thanks to Barb & Jane, Patrick D., Emily E., Amy T., Erin G., Ted W., Lisa M., & Jennifer S. for inspiring my next band name: The Amorphous Bunny Blobs. (We'll only play sock hops, of course.)