My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Disenchantment Under the Sea

I'm telling you, things just haven't been the same here since Ariel opted for a water delivery!


♫ A sea birth ain't always keener

Sometimes it's a big mistake.


There's stuff you just can't unsee there

It even upset the hake.


Just look at the fish around you

She freaked 'em out by the score!


The squid even lost an eye now -

"Don't want it anymore."


Under the sea!

[Oh my, Dory!]

What did we see?

[Under the sea!]


Childbirth ain't better,

just 'cause it's wetter

Take it from me!

Up on the shore it works OK.
Just let the doctors earn their pay!

'Cause if we're voting

 "It was revolting!"

Under the sea! ♫



Thanks to Carolann, Elizabeth G., Tiffany G., Nicole & Koren S., Angela G., Amy R., Trish L., Pon T., Chris, and James N., for not watering down their labors of love. (And, yes, the octopus is very well done... which is probably why it's creeping me out so much.)


« Friday Favs | Main | Droning It In »

Reader Comments (63)

It is rather fun to think of all but one wreck reacting in horror to that one wreck. Maybe that's toddler Ursula.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

On that sixth cake, did they use up all of the leftover frosting in the bakery on that one cake, just to get rid of it? I counted at least 9 different colors of frosting, as well as 3 different shapes of sprinkles.

The colors of frosting on all of the other cakes are questionable, too. As much as I love cake, I would have to say, "No, thanks" if offered a slice of any of these.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPatti

Is that last one a spoof on baby butt cakes?! GENIUS. Though not a "wreck" I feel it appropriate in the under the sea post. Hilarious!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLindsey

I don't know...I kind of love that last cake. It reminds me of that episode of Family Guy where there's a nuclear fallout and Stewie turns into a squid-baby. I wonder if I can find someone to do that for my baby shower...

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMrs. A

Wait.. is that last octopus cake a baby butt cake? With an octopus butt? Oh my... Just checking.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterK

I kinda like that 2nd cake. Kinda cute and the air brushing is such that it almost looks like the whole thing is lit up from the inside.

I could see a cute animated puffer fish that looks like him being a great comedy attraction in a Little Mermaid episode.

I have to agree with @Classic Steve though - that does sort of look like baby Ursula. In an extremely creepy and "keep it away from me" way, it is appealing.

As for the rest, just looking at them makes me want to reach for a bottle of pepto...and given how much I abhor that stuff, that's saying something!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHey Nony Ne

Wow! You have outdone yourself with this one! :)

Poor sebastian will be moving into the acquarium after this trauma.

The red icing fish of death is interesting as well. Kardashian lips and a fatal level of red food coloring!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterVixx

holy carp! what ON EARTH (or under water) could possibly possess someone to do the "octopus in diapers" cake?? I'm so disturbed...

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAlice

I have to imagine there's someone in this world who's a sucker fior a well-made octopus arm cake.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNyperold

I agree with Hey Nony Ne...I really like that second cake. And, if it hadn't have been squished somewhat, the second-to-last one might be kinda cute too. The color on the body of the grey/green squid though is revolting!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

The second cake is kinda cute - looks like a nite lite.

The baby butt tentacles cake is GENIUS!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEric Stott

Have these people never seen a fish??

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Like the puffer fish (#2). LOVE the baby octopus. It's not a wreck but it works perfectly.

If the red lips (#4) is not an inflatable vinyl pillow — and I'm not convinced it isn't — it is very well done. It even has seams along the lips where the plastic was bonded together. I can envision someone bringing in pictures of the plastic lips-chair that is a running family joke and asking for a cake that looks like it — with eyes.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJane

What is supposed to be wrong with cakes #2 and #8?

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKeks

That poor first baby looks like someone cut off his front two legs, then sort of placed them gently in front of the baby. O_O indeed.

On the squid cake, I was looking closely to see if they'd thrown some sliced black olives on there. Never underestimate the garnishes of a lazy wreckerator!

Most excellent post, Jen!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

I knew it was coming... it was all leading somewhere... then the last one!!! OMG I snorted and cried laughing!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

The puffer cake hit home with me. In the Navy, I was on the USS Puffer, SSN 652. The Ursula? cake is pure genius. The rest of them "Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water" (with apologies to Steven Spielberg)

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commentercatspaw66

That third-to-last one is both bad and good at the same time! I think it's supposed to be some kind of gar. Those have manky, ugly rough skins sort of like that depicted. the baker got some good texture going underneath the thin greenish frosting. It would be hard to eat though, due to its ugliness. Also, what the heck is up with the (possibly) rum balls? Is the fish eating them as bait? Or, is it chewing on a rock, right under its mouth? Confusing...

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

Thanks a lot @Sharyn. I've spent YEARS trying to get that song out of my head and in less than 2 minutes you've completely destroyed all my hard work. Well done!

I'm pretty sure the second one is glow in the dark.

The bright blue one kinda scares me. It's mostly cute and all but I'm not sure what that color would do to ones digestive system (and I'm not willing to find out!)

I'm with mindy1, I don't think these people have ever seen a fish.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

1) Jen is officially the Intertoobz Ghoddess for using "Hake" in a blog post.

2) What ARE those brown, roundish things next to the Zombie Pike? (Do I want to know?)

3) The fish in that second-to-last cake seems to have gotten hold of the umbilical cord...

4) I want the Cthulhu tentacle baby cake. It rocks.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBADKarma

If I am ever pregnant again, I am totally finding someone to make that tentacle baby butt cake. That is genius.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKHandcock

Augh! My all-time favorite classic Disney movie is violated by these cakes! Thanks a lot. No really, thanks a lot for real, this post is hilarious! :D

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterLaura P.

Thanks for the ear worm, Sharyn! Great job!

These are all cute, funny, and wrong, all at the same time. Perfect wrecks, I'd say! :-)

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

On second glance, are those octopus tentacles coming out of a baby diaper? Is THIS why the song is about giving birth unda da sea? ;)

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJess

Eating that ultra blue fish would leave you looking hypothermic for the day.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTrasawee

Since I'm actively (though not right as I type this, of course) trying to conceive, I'm so bookmarking this post to have the last cake for a baby shower. It's somehow less disturbing than human baby bottom cakes. Way less.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterMyra

Oh my. Just because a cake is done well, doesn't mean it SHOULD be done! I'm going to have nightmares about those tentacles!!!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterTauna

I just listened to that song last night as part of my impromptu Disney medley; now it's stuck in my head again. Thanks. :P

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

I odn't know exactly why, but 'It even upset the hake' made me laugh, and laugh, and laugh...

Think I may adopt this as an everyday phrase. 'I've eaten enough to upset a hake', for example.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCarol Anne @ Rock Salt

I've seen enough Hentai to see where this was going ;)

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterRobibnikoff

Both my babies were born under water. If I ever have another, he or she will be, too. I definitely need an octopus baby cake next time around! :P As if water birth didn't freak out the inlaws enough... Muahahaha!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterK

I loved the baby octobutt cake though !!! <3

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterQuay

I love the pufferfish cake! I think it's absolutely adorable

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

:::standing ovation:::

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDonna

That last one reminds me of Men in Black.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDorci

Oh dear, someone's love affair with Lovecraft has gone a little too far. (Dear, don't read the Necronomicon when you're expecting...)

Also, ew. Fish + cake is just bad. OTOH, I'm no longer hungry...

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterWendy

Heart Cthulu Baby!

Disappointed in your lyrics theme. I know water births sound "weird, but people opt for them because they reduce the pain significantly with no side effects for mom or baby. I feel like maybe Sebastian and the other sea life could be a bit more supportive of Ariel's birthing choices.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

I love the commentary. I could totally sing along with it. Thanks for the smile today.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth

Baby Octopus rump cake = BEST CAKE EVAH! Maybe it's Baby Cthulhu?

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJen @ Cup a Dee Cakes

Great post, Sharyn. Congradumations on the raise, @Jodee! Did they have cake?

#1 The 'crab' looks decidedly egg-shaped to me, making this another example of pan repurposing gone wild.

#2 This would be a great night light for a child -- a child you're training to have nightmares, anyway.

#3 Bad Joke Eel after that espresso tanker went down in rough seas.

#4 This one looks inflatable, down to the 'seams' on the lips. Let's sea, massively red fish on an oil spill? Unless one knows how certain colors of frosting metabolize, one's local walk-in clinic could experience a sudden spike in business.

#5 Please tell me those are not olive slices.

#6 Needs something -- maybe sprinkles or some flotsam.

#8 One's local walk-in clinic must have sponsored this one. "Moohahahahaha."

#9 Dear cod, what is that thing?

#10 And the award for 'most disgusting use of a gummi worm' goes to...

#11 Though well-executed (someone should be behind this), it is presumably Jen-approved, thus still a wreck per the Bylaws. Theardare is pacing...

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

@Craig ~ I'm wearing a sweater in your general direction today. Hey, it's a little chilly up here in the PNW!

@sendingtheclowns ~ I'd wear one in your direction too but I don't know which direction that is. o.O

I really want that puffer fish in plush so I can keep it on my desk and look at it all day.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I see that someone
solved the Mermaid Problem, eh?
I'll have the tako.

(Thanks to Sharyn for my last line today!)

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

This would have been a really fabulous post without the commentary on water birth. Fish do everything in water ;) . The last cake is the best.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJ

I'm usually just a lurker, but this post was extra-brilliant!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSammi

That octopus tentacle baby-bum cake was an homage to baby-bum cakes, created by a NOT PROFESSIONAL (but should be) cake decorator for his baby shower (the baby doesn't have tentacles, but she does have the cutest little legs). That cake was also freakin' delicious. He is an extraordinarily excellent professional cook and artist, and very eloquent on the subject of food and cooking. You should check out his blog: and if you're in the Greater Toronto Area and you want to hire him, drop him a line and you might get lucky.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjudy

That last one really isn't so bad. It genuinely looks like an pink octopus tentacle. It's fairly close to what we see here on Sundays, you gotta admit.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBea

BEST baby butt octopus cake I've ever seen!!

(Er, only baby butt octopus cake I've ever seen . . . but maybe it will start a trend?)

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterFM

Tell me the "revolting" one is a Slaughterfish from the Skyrim video game!! That would be such an awesome grooms cake, and if it is then it's actually perfectly done. The bon-bons in front would be the slaughterfish eggs which you can find on the riverbanks and are harvestable for use in creating potions.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterRachel

I WANT a baby butt octopus cake! That may be worth having another baby for. Maybe.

Or maybe I'll just have one made for my birthday and confuse all my friends.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAggiedog

@Craig - Actually, the octopus baby bum cake shouldn't count as a 'wreck', not just because it's awesome, but because it's not technically a 'professional cake'. The guy who made this is an exceptionally talented cook and artist, but he doesn't work as a cake decorator nor was this cake commissioned and paid for by someone else. I don't know where Jen found this photo (did someone send it in for Sunday Sweets?), but it's definitely not a wreck by any stretch of the imagination.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterjudy

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>