My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Disenchantment Under the Sea

I'm telling you, things just haven't been the same here since Ariel opted for a water delivery!


♫ A sea birth ain't always keener

Sometimes it's a big mistake.


There's stuff you just can't unsee there

It even upset the hake.


Just look at the fish around you

She freaked 'em out by the score!


The squid even lost an eye now -

"Don't want it anymore."


Under the sea!

[Oh my, Dory!]

What did we see?

[Under the sea!]


Childbirth ain't better,

just 'cause it's wetter

Take it from me!

Up on the shore it works OK.
Just let the doctors earn their pay!

'Cause if we're voting

 "It was revolting!"

Under the sea! ♫



Thanks to Carolann, Elizabeth G., Tiffany G., Nicole & Koren S., Angela G., Amy R., Trish L., Pon T., Chris, and James N., for not watering down their labors of love. (And, yes, the octopus is very well done... which is probably why it's creeping me out so much.)


« Friday Favs | Main | Droning It In »

Reader Comments (63)

"Jaws"! THAT's what I was trying to remember! In the part where Quint is talking about the way a shark looks when it's killing/eating something, he describes the shark's eyes as being "like a doll's eyes" and the way they seem to roll back into the shark's head, etc. It was creepy (and awesome).
Anyway, that's sort of what I see in the green fish its blank, dead eye.(I know, kind of dramatic for a GoofyGreen&NearlyNeon pastry, huh??)
@Jodee: North of Somewhere, South of Somewhere Else, East of Overthere, and West of Underwhere.
(=^e.e^= It's been an oddish day...!)

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

I laughed, I really did! But did no one else see a two-headed dog on the #7 cake? No?... Just me, hunh.

the second one (purple spines) looks exactly like a squeaky toy my dog had when he was little! *sniff* now, he's a "senior" dog and it has nothing to do with schools ;)

the eighth one (shades of blue) is an amazing color- I'd love a dress in with those tones in it!

is the ninth one Flotsam or Jetsam? I never could tell those two apart

btw, to those concerned that this post is disrespecting water births- look at it from the point of view of the sea life: they're going to breathe that water...if you've witnessed the miracle of birth first hand (and I have) then you get it!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterBarbara Anne

@ Emily - We had a home water birth (or tried, but baby was born above water - he needed a gravity-assist.), and did hypnotherapy for birthing pain relief (AWESOME!). At one point, I commented that we were taking the road less traveled a la Robert Frost and my hubby replied, "Honey, we're so far off the beaten path, we've fallen off the edge of the Earth!" :-) So, Emily, no matter what Sebastian or anyone (or anyfish!) says, take the road less traveled, the unbeaten path, and fall off the world! :-) But remember that "Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places", as Jen says. Ok? :-)

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKarateLady

Cake#9: This is SADsludgySlimy!MOLDYmildewyMucky!PITIFULputridPukeworthy! And it's bringing me down, man...real down. It, as a theoretical cake, can't even look forward to being eaten & enjoyed, because...well, Because Horrendous...that's why.
=^.\/.^= sigh

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Wow-who knew octopus baby shower cakes were a thing? If not now, they will be, based on the comments!

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJenna

Oh, lordy...*shuddertwitchtwitch*

Jen, I hope you're starting to feel better.

August 1, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCheryl

The last one is actually kinda sorta pretty, probably a specialty cake for someone in the marine business. You can see the technical talent.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPeggy

What is making that second cake glow?? I think it is sort of neat in a way lol. Then again I am weird that way I guess. But if it glows it catches my attention unless it happens to be a clown then I just whistle and slowly move away from it.

August 2, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Congratulations Mr. Cthulu, it's a girl!

August 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterDeidre

Well I felt like a cheerless downer spoilsport after this one so at least I'm not the only one who was disappointed by the lyrics' mocking opinion of waterbirth. Believe me, I'm all for finding humour in weird situations but the whole societal gestalt about birth being "gross" is something that's deeply saddening for me. Besides which -- where do you think mermaids would normally give birth in the first place? And all underwater mammals? How is a human's contribution to the water that the 'rest of the sea life will have to breathe' any worse than that of a WHALE? (Besides which, the majority of human waterbirths are in birth tubs, not in the sea anyway... and are in fact far less messy than land-based births since everything is 'washed up' automatically and then just drained away, no piles of 'blue pads' and bloody towels everywhere!)

I found the cakes hilarious, and most of the lyrics hilarious too. IMO, "let the doctors earn their pay" isn't funny though, it's symptomatic of the deep distrust we've allowed to develop of the human body and the miracle and the power of normal birth. The fact that many people will find it funny and 'no big deal' is also, to me, showing the depth of the antipathy about birth rights issues (eg, doctors "earn their pay" by subjecting 30-40% of their patients to major abdominal surgery (with real and serious risks to mother and baby in the short and the long term) which, in 80-90% of cases, was brought on by medical birth management and the "cascade of interventions" rather than any true biological necessity) - and, in fact, even an antagonism towards those trying to get the facts out (eg - a full 2/3 of ACOG's standard procedures are based in tradition and not in research!!) about birth issues.

Oh well. :) It takes time for a social paradigm to change and we're only in the middle of it right now, I'll just keep enjoying the other cakes in the meantime. And the hentai baby is adorable. ;)

August 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

Assuming you've seen this one? :)

August 3, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

I agree with some of the previous posters that the message here is rather disheartening. A year ago, my doctors "earned their pay" by slicing me open unnecessarily. Now that I know better, I'm definitely going for a water birth next time!

The lyrics are very cleverly done, though! And that octopus baby cake is incredible, but way too creepy for me. That would induce some pregnancy nightmares for sure.

August 16, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterKelsey

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>