My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

It's Official: Bakers Hate The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

I don't know why, minions, but it's true: bakers hate the Ninja Turtles.

How else can you explain this?


Or this?



Aw, a lobster reached across his face and tried to flex. SO CUTE.


So fierce are the flames of this loathing that some bakers are driven - DRIVEN, I say - to churn out new turtle-'trocities every week!

But why?


Did they hear "Cowabunga" one too many times as a child?

Is this retribution for the Turtles' anchovy & fudge sauce pizza orders?



Are these bakers secret members of The Foot Clan?!


Or - and this one is truly unthinkable - do they not like the new theme song*?

♫ The good guys win and bad guys lose! ♪

[awkwardly stops chair dancing]


Whatever the reason, bakers, can't we all just get along?

And stop shoving spoons in Raphael's face?

After all, bakers, we really don't need you destroying our childhood heroes.


We have movie producers for that.*


Thanks to Amanda S., Carrie H., Crista C., Aubrey D., Becca, Cat R., Sharlyn W., Anony M., Jennifer J., & Tabatha B. for the excuse to post this:


[resumes chair dancing]


[* Though I'm optimistic about Lady Ghostbusters. Did you see the new trailer that dropped today?]


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Reader Comments (34)

At least the first wreck got the colors for the 4 masks correct.. That's about it though..

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered Commentertkguru8

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Now they’re going through hell
Turtles glower

Here we go! With the spleen green, butter cream
On the scene, splayed out in a deathly scene
Our tears stream into the sewers like broken dreams
Get sick with the shell-shocked pizza kings

These can barely pass for food
The ccc’s green ooze makes a guy say “eww”
Should stay in the shadows so we don’t spew
Bad bakers win and we all lose

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Now they’re going through hell
Turtles glower!

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Oh my! The CCC with the Foot Clan heading seems to have an extra cupcake...hanging pretty far down, judging by the placement of its legs!

The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were after my time, so I know nothing about them.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

Take two, my first post went bye bye...Ahem..All Together now:
"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"
"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"
"Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles"
"Heroes in a half-shell, Turtle Power!"
That's from the cartoon series way back when my son was a kid and I became a it's stuck in my head, thanks Jen! LOL These cakes turned a sweet memory into an even sweeter nightmare, gotta luv it!

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

In #2 are those TIRE TRACKS killing poor Raphael?!?!?!?

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Paper

Number two - "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Meet Speed Racer" never got off the ground.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterEoin

Well, well, ,,,,WELL..I see I haven't missed much! Still, it can be comforting to know that bakers & wreckorators are valiantly charging halfspeed ahead ....churning out those daily works of...uhhh. SO how gave y'all been? And seriously...,Ninja Turtles still live ???? Will wonders never........=^-.-^=

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

I'm just as horrified by the fact that in the last cake picture, the...cake? the background is a wrapped cupcake jammed into the icing of other wrapped cupcakes that have been jammed into the icing of an actual cake. Just...why?

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered Commenteramber imperius

WHAT is going on in the background of that last picture?

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJo

Oh mercy. These are horrific. But it makes me wonder if you might like the Studio C sketch called TMNT Dance. hehe. It makes the cakes look almost normal...

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterHAL

I can see the lobster. I was thinking a moose or giraffe head myself.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJane

Oh how awful, they crucified Raphael and are now playing tic-tac-toe on his chest! MONSTERS!

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

Huh - #5's not a half bad green Meatwad.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered Commentersrand

I find #5 to be cute and endearing. It looks like Meatwad from Aqua Teen Hunger Force all ready to go trick or treating in his li'l Donatello costume. Adorbs.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterStormy

Honey that's NOT a lobster ... google "Snake Necked Turtle" and you'll see what I mean.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterRanney

@srand and @Stormy, you so called it with Meatwad! Now I hear his voice in my head singing the TMNT song. Try it; it's fun!

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

That second one brought back all the repressed memories of 10th grade Biology and the smell of formaldehyde and having to pin back....OH!MAKE IT STOP!
I will definitely be getting my grandsons' opinion on these. They will not be pleased. Yes, Sendingthecliwns, the Turtles moved on to the next generation. That's what happens when you're mutant, I guess.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered Commenters.marie

I didn't know any of the ninja turtles were advertising Mucinex (cake 8)..... Poor fellow, looks like he's got a whopper of a sinus infection!

And wow.... that's the first time I listened to the updated theme song. Is it just me or is listing off all their talents and then coming to poor Donatello and saying "He's one of a kind" a smidge condescending? It's like, "We know he's special!" Poor turtle - that alone was bait enough to use him for a bunch of wrecks!

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNaughty Nautilus

@SuBee...AWESOME BAVO. I'm A Big Fan of your posts and you never disappoint. Thank you for the new lyrics now stuck in my head.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

I agree that #5 is not so bad, especially compared to the rest of them (ESPECIALLY that last one).

And yes, I've seen the trailer for the new all-female Ghostbusters. It does not fill me with enthusiasm. Nope.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJan's Sushi Bar

#2 - Is Raphael wearing his shell on his front side? How many pizza parties did he attend last night?

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBluebonnet

That's not a lobster, that's a...........oh, sorry, don't want you to get Facebook censored again.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJanet

Always love your stories & posts here as well as on EPBOT. I loved the new Ghostbusters trailer, in addition to the Exorcist reference. I'm a recent convert to Legos and have the original Ecto-1 built and now building the firehouse lab with my husband! Lego will be getting the new female characters - a fun addition to our sets. Thank you so much for sharing your FUN with us!!!

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterGinger Dillon

That last one bears an eerie resemblance to Joel Veitch's Sponge Monkeys.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJay

I also like the 5th one.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKeks

I definitely have a gutter mind because that was not a Lobster that I see. More like Michaelango smacking his penis on Leonardo's face.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterChristine


March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLuLu

One of my all time favorite theme songs. Ever.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCarissa

Is it possible that the "creator" of number 5 is a big fan of the Aquateens?

Meatwad make the money, see. Meatwad get the honeys, G.

March 3, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterTom

I'm with you guys on #5 as Meatwad in his Halloween costume!! I can almost hear his cute little voice!

"Come on, you guys, before all the neighbors run out of candy!"

March 4, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJMixx

Oh wow. These look like they all got hit by a steamroller. Truly a horrific sight lol.

March 4, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

The "unthinkable" one might be a pretty bad Ninja Turtles cake but it would make a pretty good Pedro the Frog cake.

March 4, 2016 | Unregistered Commentererror27

I'm giving the cupcake cake the benefit of the doubt and assuming it's a Mirage style tail.

March 4, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKyle S.

That last one... Is he rising from the depths of some subterranean science laboratory where he had his DNA spliced with a hockey puck? Or did he attempt to remove a manhole cover using the power of his mind (or rather, skull)?

March 4, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterThe Other Jen

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