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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Nov112008

Monkey See, Monkey Doo-Doo

What is it with monkey cupcake cakes? Bad enough that it's a cupcake cake, but then to try and make a monkey out of it? (Heh: "make a monkey out of it". I guess that's not so hard, eh? Eh?) Asking for a cute monkey CCC seems destined to failure, if you ask me.

Case in point: here's what reader Alexis P. wanted for her son Caden's 1st birthday:


Which is sort of cute, but not really; the swirl cupcakes make it look like Mr. Monkey has see-through arms and legs. That isn't the Wreck, though...

This is:


Yikes.

I can't decide if this is a monkey at a stick-up who just soiled himself (an unfortunate effect of not outlining the "tail"), or if he's another steamroller victim. Or, given that expression, I suppose he could be on some Amazon torture rack - I mean, those arms and legs are rather long...

But wait! There's more!

Aren't you curious what the birthday boy thought of his cake? Because fortunately for us Alexis captured little Caden's reaction for posterity:

Ah, I can almost hear the little shrieks of terror from here. Kinda reminds me of my own family gatherings...

Think of it this way, Alexis: without experiences like this, what will Caden talk about later in therapy? Oh, and Caden, there's always our young Wreckporter's intern program for next year.

NOTE: I've been getting some complaints about the proliferation of CCCs here on Cake Wrecks - which is kind of like complaining about all the sick people in hospitals, if you think about it. Still, I'll do my best to space them out between "real" cakes for y'all. Remember, though: if we let these silent menaces go unmentioned, bakeries might start thinking they're acceptable! We can't have that, now can we?

Monday
Nov102008

Marine Wild Life: The Big 2-3-3!

I'm indebted to reader Amy O. for not only informing me that today is the Marine Corps' birthday, but for also providing a little Wreckage to go with! Now, her e-mail was positively loaded with important-sounding acronyms, but from what I could decipher she gets to inspect some of the DFAC's (that's dining facilities) cakey creations over in Iraq - you know, when she's not defending truth, justice, and top-secret acronym-creations.

To be fair, this isn't too bad. Someone just hit the "align right" button before piping in "Devil Dogs":

(That little smudgie next to the "s" is supposed to be an exclamation mark.) There are more spacing issues around the logo, too, and speaking of which... Uh, Amy, I think I need to look up the Marines' logo again, because that bit below the eagle looks like a...well... [shifty eyes]

Never mind. I got enough flak today for the Mario Lopez eye candy remark. ;)

SO...how 'bout that wonky "s" and "f" in "semper fi", eh? I mean, hey, what's THAT all about?