My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

The Spider Wreck Chronicles

Not long ago I told you all about a Wreckporter who was foiled in her attempt to photograph a spider Wreck. Since then many of you have sent in photos asking, "Was this it?". Of course I have no way of knowing, so we'll just have to ask Mrs. Tantrum. So, hey, Mrs. Tantrum, was this it?

For what it's worth, this one isn't TOO bad. Other than the fact that the legs are sprouting out of its face like whiskers, of course. And all that black frosting. And the disturbingly ambivalent mouth expression. And the fact that it's a CCC. Yep, not bad at all.

In fact, from what I've seen that is actually the most popular style of spider cake out there. Here are some more colorful models:

This one at least has its face in the right place (always a good thing), but I'm not sure what's going on in the mouth area. Plus, that Haunted gingerbread kit in the background is pure Wrecky gravy.

I would be remiss if I didn't include the steamrolled model:

Plus, yellow? Really? This looks more like a colorful dust mite, or maybe an alien brain with tubing attached, but a spider? No way.

Or how about this guy - or should I say 'girl'?

Sure, she looks more like a muppet with dreadlocks and a bald-spot than a spider, but she's so gosh-darn cute!

Speaking of dreadlocks...

Cha mon, dese be some hoppy Rasta spiders! They be jammin'. And really, have you ever seen pipe cleaners look so delicious?

Alyss H., Rebecca S., Valerie S., Katie M., and Tina F., tune in tomorrow for the terrifying conclusion to...

[dum dum da dummm] The Spider Wreck Chronicles.


Ghosts with the Most, Continued

This is:

A) the fabled Ghost Genie of Graceland, said to occupy the King's old rhinestone jumpsuits and known to terrorize tourists with his swirly bouffant 'do and tiny T-Rex arms

B) the Michelin Man after an unfortunate smelting accident

C) cloud porn (if you don't tell your kids, who will?)

Hey, that's cheating - the ghost is made of plastic! Thank goodness for the airbrushing, tri-colored tree spikes, and two disapproving pumpkins (see below); or else this wouldn't be a Wreck at all.

Pumpkin #1: "Hey, what's with the ghost's purple nose?"
Pumpkin #2: "I dunno - maybe he got a boo-boo. Get it? 'Boo-boo'? Ahahahha!"
Pumpkin #1: "Dude. You are so annoying."
Pumpkin #2: "Or maybe he inherited it from his transparents? Huh?"
Pumpkin #1: "Forget I said anything. Really."
Pumpkin #2: "Oh, wait, I know! He had too many spirits last night! Get it? 'Spirits'?"
Pumpkin #1: "Somebody cut the cake already. I can't take it anymore."

Thanks to Leanna P. and Shawn A.!