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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Nov252009

Really? I Mean, Really?!? (Yes, MORE Turkey Wrecks)

Apparently my top "20" ways to wreck a turkey cake just weren't enough for you guys. I know this because some of you are:

a) complaining that the past two days' Wrecks don't technically add up to 20, and

fork) still sending in a truly dizzying array of Wreckage that simply must be shared.

These include gems like...

the Clown Turkey.
[insert joke about a funny taste here]

The Electrocuted Turkey:

Shocking!

The Albino Technicolor Dream Coat Turkey:

At least it's pretty. Which is more than I can say for...

The Vortex of Insanity!!! Turkey:

Someone, somewhere, actually thought this was a good idea. Let's take a moment to really let the impact of that sink in, shall we?

Some of you requested more non-cupcake-cake Turkey Wrecks, though. Nooo problem.

[rapid blinking]

Uh...How do you feel about cupcake Turkey Wrecks?

Turkey snails!
(Just one question: how do you pick them up?)

Rasta Turkey Snails!
(With...chicken heads? Ok. Sure. Why not?)

Ok, Ok, now for some "real" cakes:

Well, the *turkey* looks pretty good, but that green pterodactyls attacking him could use a little work.

And lastly, here's a foul fowl that could give the Coiled Crap Hound a run for its money:

Sweet Steaming Swirls of Stacked Shh...er...Sherbert!! Yeah.
That sorry sucker sure seems surprised.

Jen D., Jaime H., Jen L., Amanda S., Gloria C., Jen P., Bonnie L., & Elaine M., don't look at me like that; I'm sure there's chocolate sherbert*
somewhere.

- Related Wreckage: And Now, a Word from Your Thanksgiving Turkey Cakes

* Also spelled "sherbet", "shebert" and "shrbrt".

Tuesday
Nov242009

Talkin' Turkey Tuesday, Too

We're continuing to count down (up?) the top 20 ways to wreck a turkey cake. Hold on to your giblets, folks, 'cuz this is gettin' gooood.

11. By confusing turkeys with bank-robbing peacocks:

(But isn't his little kerchief mask adorable?)

H. By plumbing the depths of the phrase "intestinal fortitude":


Spoon. By anthropomorphizing a mushroom cloud:

Yes, seriously.
(I know, right?!? That's what *I* said!
)

XVI: By confusing "turkey" with "demon snuffleupagus...from Rio":


17. Or by confusing it with the Magnificent Bagel-Nosed Falcon of Uganda:

(The resemblance is uncanny.)

R. By sketching out your next art car for "Burning Man":


And lastly...

20. By putting an Indian headdress on Cthulhu:


Nicole D., Marcy P., Sarah T., Diane M., Lindsay H., Michelle G., & Kristen R., I'm starting to forget what a turkey even looks like. I guess that means I'm ready to start decorating!

- Related Wreckage: Turkeys

NOTE: Hey, Floridians! John and I will be at the Orlando Public Library Saturday, Dec. 12th, at 2PM. Here's your chance to stock up on signed copies of Cake Wrecks, aka "the perfect stocking stuffer." ;) Go here for details, and to RSVP.