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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Sunday
Feb192012

Sunday Sweets: Disney

Salaga-doo-la, menchika-boo-la, Bibbidi-bobbidi-boo! Put them together, and what have you got?

You've got some magical Disney cakes coming your way, that's what!

Now quick, close your eyes. What's the first thing that pops into your head when you hear the words Disney icon?

Was it Mickey Mouse?

Submitted by Patricia K. and made by Cake Occasions

Of course it was!

(Hey, you didn't even close your eyes, did you?)

(Because I can tell when you're lying.)

(In fact, you could say it's as plain as the nose growing on your face.)

By Le torte decorate di Beatrice

(I am SO GOOD at segues.)

Don't worry, though, I could never stay mad at that sweet wide-eyed face for long. And those rosy cheeks! The fondant candles are an ultra-cute touch, too. Why aren't there more fondant candles on cakes? Way neater than the real thing, in both senses of the word.

But let's talk about lying some more. For instance, if you say Fantasia is your favorite Disney movie of all time, you are probably lying. In fact, I just did a quick poll of my Facebook friends. Zero percent liked Fantasia the best. Granted, I got 17 total responses, but still.

Still, Fantasia in cake form? Freaking. Amazing.

By Cake Lava

I want to frolic in those frothy waves!

Look at the water pouring out of the buckets! Beautiful.

 

Shhh. What's that sound?

[Tick-tock tick-tock tick-tock ...]

Did you hear that?

I think it must be time to sink our teeth into some action and adventure, Neverland-style!

By Variedades Dalila

Awww, this cake gives me happy thoughts.

 

And let's not forget a Disney legend in her own right: Mickey's main squeeze, Minnie! Here's a fun homage to Miss Mouse:

By Erin H.

Polka dots and ruffles are a winning combination, any way you slice it.

 

Or bite it!

Submitted by Karen B. and made by Zoey Cakes

And if those ears are made with Thin Mints, as I suspect, then this cute little confection just entered a whole 'nother stratosphere of awesomliciousness. Mmmm.

 

Plenty of cuteness is happening down in the Hundred Acre Wood, too.

By Andrea's SweetCakes

See kids, this is why you want to hire a professional. I can't even imagine the travesties that would occur if you called up your local wreckery and ordered a "Pooh cake." (Wait. Actually, yes I can. Thanks, Jen!)

 

Here's one of my favorite scenes from Cinderella, cake-ified:

By Wendy's Taarten

So much detail here, plus some gravity-defying construction: How is the little bird hovering mid-flight off the side of the cake? And how on Earth is that mouse's head staying upright on that tiny neck?!

 

One more question: How can I get myself invited to some of these Disney-themed birthday parties? Seriously.

Submitted by Mitushi B. and made by Jen The Cookie Chick

I think I'm in love with the Goofy hat tier, but it's nice to see Pluto getting a subtle nod, too!

 

Nothing subtle about these cookies, though:

Submitted by Nancy H. and made by Katie's Something Sweet

Sheesh, Cinderella, if you love Prince Charming so much, why don't you marry him?

Oh, wait...

 

Now this is incredible:

By Slice of Life

I have no words. I do have some gasps of awe and half-grunted sentences, though: "That is...I mean just look at... woah!" "How did...who could...?... wow!"

 

I hope these Disney cakes made all your wishes and dreams come true! Or at least made you Happy, and not Grumpy.

By Le Torte di Renato

Or Sneezy, because I would really hate for you to be allergic to cake.

That would bite.

(Ha! Get it? Like the poisoned apple?)
(Oh, never mind.)

 

Have a Sweet to nominate? Then send it to Sunday Sweets [at] Cake Wrecks [dot] com.

Friday
Feb172012

Blandle... OF JOY

You might think with all the wrecks I see each day I'd get a little jaded, but the truth is I'm constantly finding new favorites to show the cats. (And then we laugh and laugh and have a little more of this here happy juice. Good times.)

In fact, this is my new favorite baby shower cake:

Why, you ask?

Well, for a start: "Congratoletionsj." C'mon.

Next, it's painfully obvious that the first baker stopped writing after "blandle," forcing someone else to come along later and write "OF JOY!"

Which is kind of like tripping during a tap dance routine, falling off the stage into the orchestra pit - destroying the entire percussion section in the process - and then, while the audience is still waiting in shell-shocked horror to see if you're still alive, popping up and throwing some frantic jazz hands for the big finish.

Can't you see it?

[jazz hands] "OF JOY!!"

 

Oh, and did I mention the "blandle" bit? 'Cuz while I'm not sure what that actually is, I'm pretty sure this must be one:

A butt? A belly? A headless, armless infant contortionist?

Nope.

It's a BLANDLE, bee-yotches. Yep, you heard it here first. Tell your friends. (If only to warn them.)

And while you're at it, tell John I needs me some more happy juice. Ring-a-ding-ding, farm boy!

[dropping mic]

PEACE. I'm out.

 

Thanks to Erin N., Shelley P., Tonks, Lily, Mr. Snugglypants, Mrs. Whiskertickins, Sir Fuzzyknickerbottoms, & Oosawiddlewoveypiekins for being such a great audience.