My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

A Cinderella Story

With all the royal wedding coverage out there, a lot of us girls have been spending this week imagining our own Princess Diaries moment.

Now, I don't know about you guys, but mine goes a little something... like this...

[harpsichord dream sequence music plays]

First, there's a whirlwind romance with the dashing stranger who looks like a cross between Nathan Fillion and Kiefer Sutherland during his Three Musketeers days.

(Awww yeeeeah.)

Next, we sink straight into the Fire Swamp.

No, no, just kidding.

Next we play BioShock together until 2AM.

Later, after dressing up as Venkman and Staypuft for Halloween (I'm Venkman, of course), and confessing our undying love for one another, there's a painfully romantic proposal:

Performed in an inflatable kiddie pool.

"Jen," my dashing prince would say, "Will you be my own Princess Peach?"

To which I would respond, "Are you kidding? Do Vulcans need the Pon Farr?
"(But we are going to Disney for the honeymoon, right?)"

And, BAM! I'm a princess! Next thing you know, I'm living in a castle...

"And over here is your TARDIS closet. As you can see, it is much, MUCH bigger on the inside."

...and wearing pretty princess crowns...

(Modeled after crabby Space Invaders, apparently.)

...and pretty princess dresses...

("Talk about your trunk space, check this action out!")

...and riding my Princess Vespa around...

(Ok, technically this would be a Princess Harley.)

...and...and...wait. You know what? Other than the castle and crown stuff, I've already got my fairy tale ending, complete with BioShock playing, Princess Bride quoting, brownie baking prince. (Love you, Sweetie.)

So I guess I'll just end here by wishing all of you:

I like the short and fluffy ones, myself.

Thanks to today's dream team Debbie B., Anony M., Lisa V., Lisa P., Julia B., Vanessa C., & Stephanie S., who, for the record, never even knew fairies *had* tails.


A Royal Affair

Like all of you, I am simply in a TIZZY waiting to see the royal wedding tomorrow. Or, more accurately, the royal wedding cake.

I mean, think about it: this is the cake that must end all cakes. It has to outshine, outdo, and outhouse every dream of every girl who has ever dreamed of being a princess! [sigh]

Plus, just imagine the unbelievable stress the poor bakers must be under at this very moment. The agony! The suspense! The weighty sense of impending doom, should their one shot at world-wide glory, fame, and adoration fail! BWAHAHAHAAAA!

Er...I mean...

Wishing you the best of luck, guys!

So, what do you think it'll be? Something colorful?

Something modern?


Of course, whatever it is, you know it'll have to be an upstanding specimen...

...with just the right emphasis on the fact that they live in a castle, and you don't:

Hey, maybe it'll be inspired by Kate's wedding dress!

Or maybe it'll just show the couple's deep love and affection for one another:

("Pardon me, your lordship, but would you care for a slice of chocolate thigh?"

"Ruddy good, yes! Tally ho! What what!*")

Well, whatever the outcome tomorrow, I'm sure so long as the bakers don't give the happy couple the cold shoulder, they'll be fine.


Must. Stop. Staring at. Shoulder hock.

Many thanks to wreckporters Christin S., Gary & Brittany J., Melissa B., Kelli B., Amy E., Anna K., and Lou for today's joint efforts.

*Yes, I know all British people do not sound like this. But the really
cool ones do.

Note from john: For some reason, the comment section is acting all wonky today so if you don't have a Google account, you can't leave a comment. With any luck, the Google Overlords will fix the problem soon. Wreck On!