My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Let's Just Stick with "Happy Falker Satherhood"

We here at Cake Wrecks would like to wish all of you dads out there the happiest of Father's Days this weekend.

Just as soon as we figure out how.

Hm. Not quite right...


"Phathes"? Seriously?

Definitely no...

Aaaand we give up.

Of course, getting the inscription right is only half the battle:

This design works best if dad has never heard of "sarcasm."

(Also, you've got to love the not-so-subtle "Making of Me" "rug" there. Way to acknowledge the paternal contribution, Wreckerators!)


Now, don't get me wrong: I'm sure there would be buzzing around that load of...hive. It just wouldn't necessarily be by bees.

[brightening] Hey, you think those are vuvuzela horns?

Now, kids, when ordering your Daddy a cake, try to emphasize his positive qualities.

You know, like having a butt the size of Texas.

(Hey, at least they didn't call him "Super Terrific Dad." Heh.)

Carrie G., Erin H., Brady M., Ro W., Vangie B., Elisabeth K., & Katie, you've made your dads proud today. Unless, of course, you've never managed to measure up to his expectations, and he just doesn't understand you. In that case, this probably hasn't made much difference either way.


Flip Flops (Hey, Look, a Built-In Pun!)

I once read one of those "You know you're a Floridian when..." lists, and number five was " wear flip-flops to a wedding."

Now, as a long-time Florida resident, I feel I should defend my fellow Sunshine Staters by informing the rest of you that they make some *very* dressy flip-flops. Have you seen the ones with the little rhinestones on the straps? [sing-song voice] Daaar-ling! And totally black-tie appropriate, I might add.

Anyway, during the summer months it quickly becomes obvious which Wreckerators have not only never worn flip-flops, but have probably never even seen a pair, either.

If these look right to you, get thee to a podiatrist! Stat!

What the...?

Good grief, that almost makes the cupcake cake [patooie!] version look decent:

Wait., it doesn't. Never mind.

Aha! Well there's your problem: these aren't flip-flops, they're "flipp flopps."
Must be a Canadian thing.*

It gets worse when Wreckerators introduce a 3D element:

I honestly have no idea what that is jammed into the cake: Ribbon? Plastic? A moldy fruit roll-up? Bottom line: if you have to ask, don't eat it.

Here's one using either a piece of electrical wiring or a radioactive Twizzler:

But the airbrushing is what really sells it.

Of course, jamming a bit of ribbon or "candy" into a cake for the flip-flop strap is awfully complicated. Someone was bound to screw it up eventually:


Shana M., Kelly M., Hannah H., Xiaomi Q, Beth C., D'Anna, & Gins V., thanks for taking a step in the wreck direction.

*Yes, actually, I do think that's funny. (Love ya, Canada!)

Note from john - Sorry everybody; I didn't get to comments for fifteen minutes and it appears we have a "bacon" EPCOT. Completely my fault. Sorry and wreck on!

UPDATE: Once again, Google Adsense wins the day! Check out the screen shot Tara G. sent in:

"Flip-Flops in BRIDESMAIDS Colors"