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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jan062012

What's This? (No, Really.)

You guys, it's not easy following a trauma-inducing marzipan demon pig zombie, but by golly, I'm going to try.

WITH THIS:

[head tilt]

Er...

Perhaps I should mention I have no idea what that's supposed to be. However, if we knew, I bet it'd be super traumatizing. Or funny.

 

Here, let me try something a little more recognizable:

Now, as you can clearly tell from those carefully placed green and yellow squiggles, what this is is so blatantly obvious you obviously don't need me to tell you what it is. Obviously. Which is why it's in the shop's front display window.

 

And I'm just getting warmed up!

...said the melting anthropomorphic upside-down ice cream cone wearing a blonde wig.

(See? Told you these were easy.)

Your turn again!

Ahh, all that red and green really brings back the holiday spirit, doesn't it?

 

Well, WE CAN'T HAVE THAT.

Maximum trauma has now been achieved. Thank you, and good night.

 

PS:

1. This is in the display case. Meaning it's NOT a custom order.

2. Are those arms or exploding ear wax?

3. Are those eyelashes or...or...seriously, what are those things?!

4. Why would a frog have blacked-out Miss Piggy eyes?

5. Wait... Sweet Henson, is this supposed to be Kermit & Piggy's love child?!?

6. In that case, what's "Santa" got to do with it?

7. Why?

8. Why?

9. Why?

 

Thanks and Kermit flails all 'round to Kathy R., Ayla E., Cara M., Ashley A., & Liz W. for adding a colorful new character to my future nightmares.

Thursday
Jan052012

This Little Piggy Will Eat Your Soul

I thought most of the world had already seen the demon marzipan piggy that went viral Christmas week, but then again - judging by John's horrified screams of laughter when he spotted it on my screen last night - maybe not.

So, without further ado, lock up the children, grab your security blanket, and prepare to meet your newest nightmare:

Not kosher, man. NOT KOSHER.

Jonas L. made this for two little girls, if you can believe it, and there are multiple disturbing photos of said children gleefully dissecting zombie Wilbur over on his website. I think it goes without saying that hogging this cake may be a real boar, but it will definitely make you squeal.

And while it ill behooves me to butt in with gratuitous pork butt pictures, this one is sooieeet!

And by "sooieeet" I mean I just became a vegetarian.

Thanks, internet.

 

BONUS PIGGY PUN:

Q: Why do pigs hate magic?

A: Because Hogwarts make them itchy!

 

BWAHAHAHAAA!!

Sorry.