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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Jan172012

Terribly Inappropriate

A few of you are aware that today is a kind of milestone for me, since it's the day John and I planned many months ago to end this blog.

I'm happy to report this is not goodbye, however. You'll be stuck with me - bad puns and all - for a while longer at least.

So, to celebrate the fact that absolutely nothing noteworthy is happening here today, allow me to present something really inappropriate:

See? It's seasonally inappropriate!

[head tilt] Er...among other things.

And really, wouldn't "Happy HooHoo" sound better? Or did the baker realize - as I just did - that that sounds like a new feminine hygiene product?

"Happy HooHoo: for all your salsa-dancing/horseback-riding/splashing-through-the-ocean-surf needs. Because you totally do those things. If you're a REAL woman."

 

Ok, that veered into unexpectedly inappropriate places. Sorry. Let's stick with seasonal impropriety, shall we? You know, like this:

"Hey. I'M UP HERE."

Something something dairy-free! Haha!

Feels good to get that off my chest.

The nuts, I mean.

The CRUSHED nuts, I mean. Jeez. Get your mind out of the gutter already. It's getting crowded in here.

 

Ok, forget seasonally inappropriate: this is just plain wrong.

HOLY UNFORTUNATE STEM PLACEMENT, BATMAN.

Well, maybe more logs than stems...

[rimshot!]

 

Thanks to Megan H., Dion H., & Katie B. from the bottom of my peach.

Monday
Jan162012

Everything MUST GO!

"Excuse me, where's your toy department?"

"Let me answer that question with another question:

How picky are you about licking potentially food-grade plastics?"

Yep, you can always tell when bakeries are cleaning out last year's plastic flotsam inventory. Or, as I like to call it: when Darth makes new friends.

Say, d'you think if Vader were to force-choke Spongebob he'd get all wet?

Or would he just threaten to mop the floor with him?

(Because eels always look like they just told a joke and are waiting for a reaction.)

Ahem.

Moving on...

 

"Good news, boss! This customer wrote 'just make it pretty' on her order form."

"HOT DANG!! Pass me the flotsam bucket."

The lobster really pulls it together.

 

Of course, there's no reason we can't be artistic about it.

I call this one, "The Meaning Of Life, With A Fast Food Crotch Grab On The Side."

Luckily her hair matches the icing, too, so we might even find a few surpriii-seees!

 

And this one's called, "Can YOU Say, 'Yooooouuu'rrre OUT!'?

"...'Cuz Indiana Jones 4 Sucked Huevos. Am I Right, Boots?"

Ok, so that title's a little wordy. I'll keep working on it.

 

"Well, boss, we did it. There's just one piece left - a spare from our old Halloween kits. Should I throw it away?"

"Throw it away? Are you kidding? Of course not! Give it here."

"TA-DA!!

"Now we can sell it by the foot!"

 

Hey Shelli A., Kris T., Janie L., Jenn C., Lindsey S., Janie L., & Anony M, wheeeen theeee joke seems to fly like a big whoopie pie...that's a moray!