My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

The #2 Way to Ruin a Cake

Step #1: Take a perfectly decent-looking cake

Step #2: Add random poo piles - just for giggles.

C'mon, everybody, sing it with me: "Chain chain chaaaaain! Chain of poos!!"

Eh? What's that? You think those are simply palm tree poos? Ok, I guess I could see that. But, can you explain...[dramatic pause]...THIS?


Actually, this isn't too much of a leap if you figure the customer asked for a "Princess and the Pea" cake. [wicked grin]

Then there are the stock designs with poo built right in:

Poor Wall-E. I bet right about now he's wishing the humans had stayed in space.

And to think: this is what "passes" for "cake decorating." But hey, maybe the designer was wiped out after a hard day logging too many hours, and got a little lax? If so, let that be a lesson to us all: don't push too hard; you'll only strain yourself producing crappy results.


And finally, a classic for the ages:

Beauty and the Feces.

Many thanks to my #2 wreckporters Kelli N., Wendi P., Stacey B., Jenny, & Sara B.

- Related Wreckage: Who Ordered the Poo Poo Platter?


Ever Feel Like ----Thing's Missing?

Ah yes, it's Mike & Louisa of the Perpetual Merriment.
(I bet they're morning people, too. Blech.)

Forget missing words - that "t" is a work of arT!

Also, do you pronounce "Rubye" kind of like ribeye? 'Cuz that's how it sounds in my head. (When the pink Snickers bar says it, anyway. The other voices haven't reached a consensus yet.)

"Welcome N J Bell to Virizan and"


And what? What?!? TELL ME!! I MUST KNOW!!!

Arg, this suspense is killing me! Why don't you just send Sheppard out on another suicide mission and make me wait six months to see if he lives or not? Huh? How 'bout that, funny boy?*

Oh, and speaking of suicide missions:

Who wants a slice of Adam's ca-aake? [sing-song]

Anyone? Anyone?

Sure, it's nice to know that "Kaun" and Jerry are happy, but I imagine this kind of word omission could lead to some rather, shall we say, misleading, inscriptions:

[shifty eyes] Er. Yes, kinda like that.

(It's short for RICHARD, people - and I'll leave any remarks about the (in)appropriateness of the decorations to you guys.)

*Yes, I do realize that cliff-hanger was 5 years ago - I just never fully recovered, is all.

Tracy H., Shelley A., Lori & Mary S., Chris Z., Bethany G., & Jennifer H, Good!

- Related Wreckage: Insulting Inscriptions 101