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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Beyond Bizarre (225)

Thursday
Jun232016

Barking Up The Wrong Cake

So there I was, looking through thousands of awful wedding cake pics - as one does on a typical Friday night (WHAT) - when I started to notice an odd trend: tree cakes.

I don't mean the beautiful blossoming vines we see so often:

Loverly.

 

And I don't mean stump cakes, which Jen has devoted a whole tag to in iPhoto because we have that many:

Stumperly.

 

No, I mean a dead tree plastered up the side of a wedding cake.

Like this:

We really don't get enough opportunities to eat things the color of wet concrete.

 

Sometimes, in an effort to make the tree look slightly less dead, a baker will add "leaves":

 

Or "flowers":

"It just so happens this tree is only mostly dead. There's a big difference between mostly dead... and all dead.

"Now hand me that knife, and we'll split the difference."

 

My favorite, though, is the baker who opted to liven up a dead tree with polka dots:

They're just so festive. In a pox-like kind of way. (Pox-ish?)

Like a festival of pox.
Woowoo!

 

Tell you what, bakers, why not stick to what we know? Simple, beautiful, blossoming vines.

Okay, maybe these could use a few polka dots.

 

Thanks to Amy L., Allison N., Daniel & Kim, Katy G., Layne L., Jon D., & Linda N. for branching out.

*****

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Wednesday
Jun082016

I'm Guessing They Didn't Have a Matching Card

Well, at least it didn't say "Happy".
(And you have to admit: the glowsticks are an inspired touch.)

 

Mmmm, cancer rat.

 

Slice of dead Lenin, anyone?

 

I mean, it looks just like Lenin's perfectly preserved corpse, so I know you're salivating already. Why, just look how excited the kiddies are!

"No, not the cold shoulder; I want a slice of the iron fist! Now quit Stalin and get me some Lenin-ade to wash it down with, or this joint won’t be getting any high Marx from me."

 

Of course the best part was saved for the VIPs:

Ah, a little jawbone with a scoop of ice cream on the side... [kissing fingertips] magnifique!

 

And now, BONUS VIDEO!!! Because you know you wanted to see the video.

Ellie P., Whitney G., & Ann W., I think I'm going to need a Unicorn Chaser, stat.

*****

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