Well, at least it didn't say "Happy".
(And you have to admit: the glowsticks are an inspired touch.)
Mmmm, cancer rat.
Slice of dead Lenin, anyone?
I mean, it looks just like Lenin's perfectly preserved corpse, so I know you're salivating already. Why, just look how excited the kiddies are!
"No, not the cold shoulder; I want a slice of the iron fist! Now quit Stalin and get me some Lenin-ade to wash it down with, or this joint won’t be getting any high Marx from me."
Of course the best part was saved for the VIPs:
Ah, a little jawbone with a scoop of ice cream on the side... [kissing fingertips] magnifique!
And now, BONUS VIDEO!!! Because you know you wanted to see the video.
Ellie P., Whitney G., & Ann W., I think I'm going to need a Unicorn Chaser, stat.