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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Beyond Bizarre (228)

Wednesday
Jun082016

I'm Guessing They Didn't Have a Matching Card

Well, at least it didn't say "Happy".
(And you have to admit: the glowsticks are an inspired touch.)

 

Mmmm, cancer rat.

 

Slice of dead Lenin, anyone?

 

I mean, it looks just like Lenin's perfectly preserved corpse, so I know you're salivating already. Why, just look how excited the kiddies are!

"No, not the cold shoulder; I want a slice of the iron fist! Now quit Stalin and get me some Lenin-ade to wash it down with, or this joint won’t be getting any high Marx from me."

 

Of course the best part was saved for the VIPs:

Ah, a little jawbone with a scoop of ice cream on the side... [kissing fingertips] magnifique!

 

And now, BONUS VIDEO!!! Because you know you wanted to see the video.

Ellie P., Whitney G., & Ann W., I think I'm going to need a Unicorn Chaser, stat.

*****

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Wednesday
May252016

The Bakery At The End Of The Universe

[announcer voice]

Here at The Bakery At The End Of The Universe, we want our intergalactic guests to have a personal connection with their cakes. That's why all our sugary creations are given sentience before serving, so they can introduce themselves before dessert!

"Huh?"

 

To begin your End Of The Universe experience, you'll be treated to the sweetest song and dance number this side of Betelgeuse - and our petit-fours almost always finish before crying and/or spitting up their last meals!

 

Next, the parade of pastry, as each of our delectable kitchen creations tries to convince you to eat them first!

 

They're so happy you're here!

 

They can't wait to be picked!

Those are tears of joy, promise!

 

 

Once you've picked your lucky morsel, it will be whisked to the back for a quick, joyous farewell:

 

....then painlessly chopped up and plated for your dining pleasure:

MMMM.

Now that's sweet!

Yes, The Bakery At The End Of The Universe guarantees a dessert you'll remember for all your lifetimes. So come on by! Starships and Vogon liners welcome. Intergalactic AAA discounts available. Reservations recommended.

You monsters.

 

Thanks to Anony M., John D., Katherine R., Baillie L., Bailey D., Joy M., Rachel L., & Kevin F. for helping me celebrate Towel Day like a total hoopy frood. Now I'm off to eat a salad.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.