My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Beyond Bizarre (234)


Cue Cards, Please?

Last week we looked at cakes that took labeling a bit too far. Today, let's look at the other side of the coin: when cakes really need to give us that hint.

See, once you read the text, and figure out that this has something to do with some sort of ski, it suddenly all makes sense! (Sort of.)

[smacking forehead] Oh, of course! It's TNT! How could I have missed that?

Now, if you're going to give us hints, Wreckerators, it helps if they're at least somewhat legible:

Do you KNOW how long I squinted at this thing, trying to figure out why there were black jellyfish on it? Well, do you?!?

(No, I am not going to tell you what it is. I squinted hard for that knowledge, peeps.)

It also helps if the hints are spelled correctly:

So, we've got a fat anthropomorphic top lip with arms, and it says "Gone Crabiy." Oh kaaaay.
(Well, I guess the word "crab" IS in there...)

Then there are the more cryptic hints:

"Cakes" like this (and I say "cakes" because, as you all know, cupcake cakes are NOT real cakes) can help us brush up on our deductive reasoning skills. Observe:

1. There is a number on the shape, and the cake board reads "Win! Win!"
2. Numbers and winning are often associated with sports.
3. Therefore, the "cake" is a stretched out, radioactive uterus.

Meg, Paula B., Robbie, Kaycee M., & Julie M., with that 8 on there the temptation to make some kind of OctoMom crack is rather strong - but I resisted, just for you.

You're welcome.

- Related Wreckage: Say What?


Foiled Foliage

"Hello, Miss? I wish to make a complaint about this cake I purchased not half an hour ago from this very bakery."

[looking cake over] "Oh, yes, that's our Norwegian Leaves design. What's wrong with it?"

"I'll tell you what's wrong with it: these are real leaves, that's what's wrong with it."

"No, of course not! Those are just icing. Look!" [shuffling leaves]

"Look, Miss, I know real dead leaves when I see them, and I'm looking at some right now."

"No, they're icing. Remarkable leaves, the Norwegian ones, aren't they? Beautiful foliage."

"The foliage don't enter into it! You put real leaves on my cake!"

"No, they're not real, they're just shining in accords."

"Shining in accords? What does that even mean?"

"I dunno; I'm just trying to stick to this Monty Python sketch as closely as possible."

Emily E., it's like a pun. Or a, what you call it, palindrome. Yeah.

NOTE: Yes, folks, they really are real leaves. Kinda gives a new meaning to "all natural ingredients," doesn't it?

- Related Wreckage: The Word "Holy" DID Come to Mind...