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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Beyond Bizarre (197)

Saturday
Nov222008

Turkey Turkey GOOSE

Anytime you see something vaguely bird-like in a bakery this time of year, I guess you have to assume it's supposed to be a turkey. These guys found by Shelley L., however, are plopped somewhere along the line between a bat and a melting chicken:


Now, I must admit: at first glance I thought they were kind of cute. Then I realized that the 4 guys in the middle are smoking cigarettes - now what kind of an example is that? Plus, they're all being goosed by what must be uncommonly sharp candy corns: hellooo! cruelty to batty bird creatures! Not cool, man. Not cool.

Here are some other cupcake creations riding that cute/wtf? line:


Ok, yes, they're round and have googly eyes, and therefore I must love them. However, what the heck are they made of? Is that really solid icing? Please, Michele L., tell me that's not solid icing! What'd they do, ice the things with an ice cream scoop?

Thursday
Nov132008

Face Time On CW

This is so exciting, everyone: I had no idea there were Doctor Who fans in the Walmart bakery! Check this out:


How cool is that, huh? It's totally Lady Cassandra O'Brien Dot Delta Seventeen!

[crickets chirping]

What?

[Pin dropping. Loudly.]

What's with all the blank looks? Are you guys telling me you don't know who Cassandra O'Brien Dot Delta Seventeen is? Really?

Oh.

Well, here, she looks like this:

See, she's a human from the future, and she's had so much plastic surgery that there's nothing left but her face. Get it? (Really, I don't see how you guys survive without this kind of quality programming in your lives.)

Ok, now go look at that "cake" again, and tell me it's not her. Go on.

Hm? Oh. Yeah, I guess you do have a point: she doesn't have eyebrows. Or a nose. Or weird purply hair tufts. Or antennae. But if that's not supposed to be Cassandra O'Brien Dot Delta Seventeen, then I'm going to go out on a limb here and say maybe the Walmart in question should consider employee drug screening. Not that I'm implying anything by that, of course - nosirree.

Thomas R., you thought it was her, too - right?