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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Creative Grammar (69)

Monday
Mar042013

Grammar Geeks, UNITE!

K, people, confession time:

Do unnecessary quotation marks make your eye twitch? 

 

Have you ever left a comment on a friend's Facebook status explaining why it's "couldn't care less," not "could care less?" 

Do you fix the spelling mistakes in other people's tweets before retweeting them?

Are you required by forces beyond your control to whip out a pen and correct misspelled store signage?

 

Must...cross out...apostrophe...

 (And then...fix...capitals...)

(And then...add...exclamation marks...) 

And finally, do you not only know what the Oxford comma is, but have a passionate stance on its usage? 

If the answer to any of those is yes then you, my friend, are a fellow grammar geek. And today is our day. That's right; it's National Grammar Day! WAHOO!

Finally - FINALLY - we can pick apart spelling and grammar errors without fear of judgment from the text-speak-writing language butchers who keep "loosing" their minds! Today we are NOT the nit-picking jerks of the comment section; today we are HEROES. HEROES, I SAY!! 

AHAHAHAHAAA!! 

So let's get right to it:

Ah, yes. [pushing up glasses] You see, "whose" is an interrogative possessive pronoun, while "who's" is the contraction for "who is." In this context, someone is apparently asking for the identity of the owner of something euphemistically known as "40."

Haha! Isn't that a SCREAM?!

I honestly don't know why I'm not invited to more parties, you guys.

 

Maybe I should have started with something a little more common, though:


Now, see, there's an easy way to avoid this situation in the future: 

Condoms.

 

And remember, it's "I before E except after C and when you're trying to write the word 'having.'"

Also those little dots are called an ellipsis, and there should only be three of them.

YES I REALLY AM THAT PERSON. 

Not to mention the way that's written makes it look like someone is "haveing" a weird scrolly symbol. (Maybe the artist formerly known as Prince invented a new species?)

 

Hey, do you guys watch Sherlock

What am I saying? You read this blog and therefore have EXCELLENT taste in entertainment, so of course you watch Sherlock.

Anyway, remember the beginning of that episode where Holmes is interviewing a murderer, and he keeps correcting the thug's grammar?

That was awesome.

 

Now where was I?


Ah yes, the importance of punctuation and discerning between "will" and "we'll."

It also appears this person isn't entirely certain that Dee Dee will miss me, which is hard to believe. I mean, in case you haven't noticed, I AM DELIGHTFUL.


And finally, allow me to share a quick word on foreign punctuation marks:

  Gesundheit.

 

Thanks to Mary F., Mab R., Catherine B., David S., Bella P., Todd, and Zoë P., who have always known I'm a pro-Oxford-comma kinda gal.

Tuesday
Sep252012

"Perfectly" Punctual

Yesterday we covered parentheses and quotation mark. Today, THE WORLD.

Or maybe just some extra apostrophes:

This Beth belongs to Congratutation.

The booties are anyone's guess.

 

 I see lots of apostrophes where quotation marks should be, but I have to admit, this is the first time I've seen it the other way around:

I blame whatever madness drove the baker to add that L.

 

You might think periods would be easy to deal with, but if so, you're obviously a man with a death wish.

Or this baker:

I don't really know who St. David is, but I'm hoping against hope he's the patron saint of punctuation.

 

On the opposite end of the spectrum is the three period run, or if you want to get all technical about it, the ellipsis:

Because nothing conveys sincerity quite like trailing off mid...

 

 With all these confusing options, you might be tempted to skip punctuation entirely, bakers. But that path has its own perils:

Yeah, way to go, Bob. I mean, that was soooo great, that thing you did. Scha.

 

 My personal favorite, though, is the wild card mish-mosh of punctuation patter:

I dare you to do a dramatic reading of this cake.

 

 And finally, the colon cake you've been waiting for:

Come back after we slice it for the semi-colons.

 

 

Thanks to Elizabeth C., Miriam A., Doreen L., Ariel F., Sarah C., Gernez, & Kim T. for the excuse to link to Victor Borge's phonetic punctuation.