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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Creative Grammar (70)

Monday
Jun162014

Bakery Grammar 101

Grammar Rules for Bakers

 

Avoid commas, That are not, necessary.

 

Consult a dictionery to avoid mispelings.

 

""Avoid" "overuse" "of" "quotation" "marks.""

 

Prepositions are something you never end a sentence with.

 

Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

 

Only use apostrophe's when its the proper time.

 

Don't overuse exclamation points!!!!!!!!!

 

Always hyphenate between syllables, and avoid un-necessary hyp- henation.

 

No sentence fragments

See? Piece of cake!

 

Next week: Dangling participles!

 

There, they're, their. Put down the red correcting pens long enough to thank Lynne S., Malory M., Donna M., Marlese L., Allison C., Jennifer B., Samuel, Maria, Meris, and Gamal A., whose grammar is always perfect.

*****

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Monday
Mar042013

Grammar Geeks, UNITE!

K, people, confession time:

Do unnecessary quotation marks make your eye twitch? 

 

Have you ever left a comment on a friend's Facebook status explaining why it's "couldn't care less," not "could care less?" 

Do you fix the spelling mistakes in other people's tweets before retweeting them?

Are you required by forces beyond your control to whip out a pen and correct misspelled store signage?

 

Must...cross out...apostrophe...

 (And then...fix...capitals...)

(And then...add...exclamation marks...) 

And finally, do you not only know what the Oxford comma is, but have a passionate stance on its usage? 

If the answer to any of those is yes then you, my friend, are a fellow grammar geek. And today is our day. That's right; it's National Grammar Day! WAHOO!

Finally - FINALLY - we can pick apart spelling and grammar errors without fear of judgment from the text-speak-writing language butchers who keep "loosing" their minds! Today we are NOT the nit-picking jerks of the comment section; today we are HEROES. HEROES, I SAY!! 

AHAHAHAHAAA!! 

So let's get right to it:

Ah, yes. [pushing up glasses] You see, "whose" is an interrogative possessive pronoun, while "who's" is the contraction for "who is." In this context, someone is apparently asking for the identity of the owner of something euphemistically known as "40."

Haha! Isn't that a SCREAM?!

I honestly don't know why I'm not invited to more parties, you guys.

 

Maybe I should have started with something a little more common, though:


Now, see, there's an easy way to avoid this situation in the future: 

Condoms.

 

And remember, it's "I before E except after C and when you're trying to write the word 'having.'"

Also those little dots are called an ellipsis, and there should only be three of them.

YES I REALLY AM THAT PERSON. 

Not to mention the way that's written makes it look like someone is "haveing" a weird scrolly symbol. (Maybe the artist formerly known as Prince invented a new species?)

 

Hey, do you guys watch Sherlock

What am I saying? You read this blog and therefore have EXCELLENT taste in entertainment, so of course you watch Sherlock.

Anyway, remember the beginning of that episode where Holmes is interviewing a murderer, and he keeps correcting the thug's grammar?

That was awesome.

 

Now where was I?


Ah yes, the importance of punctuation and discerning between "will" and "we'll."

It also appears this person isn't entirely certain that Dee Dee will miss me, which is hard to believe. I mean, in case you haven't noticed, I AM DELIGHTFUL.


And finally, allow me to share a quick word on foreign punctuation marks:

  Gesundheit.

 

Thanks to Mary F., Mab R., Catherine B., David S., Bella P., Todd, and Zoë P., who have always known I'm a pro-Oxford-comma kinda gal.