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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Creative Grammar (70)

Tuesday
Aug232011

It's Baaaa-aaaack

Yesterday I sensed a great celebration in the Force. As if a billion stay-at-home parents suddenly cried out, and then poured themselves a margarita.


Oh, is school back in session?

 Thaaaat explains it.

 

Plus, now I know why I've been seeing cakes with random office supplies thrown on them:


 

Oh! And what "TOSCHOL" is!

That black square with the red squiggle, however, remains a mystery.

 

Now, kids, I know it may not seem like it now, but going to school really is a good thing.

For your parents, I mean. Sucks to be you!! Haha!

Ahem.

I'm sorry.

What I meant was, education is an important, vital aspect of your development, and the places we go to receive our education should be treated with the proper respect.


Now, is it easy? Of course not! After all, these places will make you [shudder] "Back ---- To The Books (Study)":

You have no idea how much I'd like to scratch out "books" and write in "Future." Then I'd replace "study" with "McFly."

Oooh, cake graffiti! Why hasn't this been done before??

[NOTE: I here at Cake Wrecks do not endorse, condone, or solicit illegal cake defacing.]

[Unless you're paid to do it.]

[Glad we cleared that up.]

['Nother Note: I'd give you $5. Just sayin'.]

 

Anyway, if it helps, kids, know that adults go to school, too.

So, you know, you've got that to look forward to.

 

Look, bottom line:

Totally.

So run along and have fun, dears! I think today I'll sit around and play Mini Ninjas while eating Marshmallow fluff straight out of the jar. Degree-holding adult, right here! Stay in shool!

 

Thanks to Wendy F., Doug, Marissa S., Megan C., Kristin J., Lucy C., and Allison V. for the education.

Wednesday
Aug102011

Our Days Are Numbered

After all the doom and gloom on the news lately, and watching the roller coaster ride that is our stock market (Ok, less "roller coaster," and more "log flume drop") yesterday John and I were happy to receive a "cheer up, it could be worse!" call courtesy of our fine government.

Actually, the call may have been more like, "Cheer up, it's about to get worse," but the upshot is we're being audited.

Don't worry, though - hey, we're not! In fact, I have a sure fire plan for dealing with auditors that simply cannot fail.

Firthly, you need a good numbers system:

Sixndly, you want to make sure all your numbers are written legibly: 

 This is either a 6, 9, comma, or apostrophe. Or a wormhole singularity. Which, given our filing system, is probably the most likely.

 Ermmm...Italy. Final answer.


To maintain a casual and friendly atmosphere, be sure to call the auditor "a # '2'" whenever possible:

That'll wipe out any irregular feelings of stopped-up hostility, and move things along in a more loose and relaxed manner. Remember, if your auditor is irritabowel, you could have a real crap shoot on your hands.

 

It's also really important to get your dates right: 

I trust this has a long shelf life.

 

And finally, if any of your numbers don't add up, remember: you can always make new ones!

 

Squiggle g pi is mine, though - go get your own new numbers.

 

Thanks to my number fun wreckporters Jen G., Hilary L., Joshua K., Alyson, Krista and Katherine. And don't worry, guys; it's just a government insurance audit. How bad can it be?

Note: Please don't answer that.