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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Creepy Cakes (148)

Monday
Oct132008

Like THIS, Not Like THAT

Fellow Cake lovers, I've come to a crisis of conscience.

You all know my stance on cupcake-cakes, and it's a stance that I thought nothing, no matter how delightfully sugar-encrusted, could change.

Then, Wreckporter Iliea S. sent me this photo:


And I have to admit, my friends, I am torn. Torn, like an old sweater! You see, yes, this is a cupcake cake. Yes, it is that crime-against-nature shade of blue, destined to stain, well, everything. By all rights I should treat this "cake" with contempt and move on.

And yet... and yet... I LIKE IT! I really do! I think the googly eyes are adorable! I even caught myself fantasizing about making this for John's birthday in a few weeks! ACK!

There, I said it. [shifty eyes] Now I feel like I need to go to cake confession or something.

Ah, but this post wouldn't be a complete without a Wreck, would it? So if I can't bring myself to label the above CCC a Wreck, I'll just have to go with...

This one!


Woohoo! Now, here the world has returned to its natural order, 'cuz this sucker is as Wrecktastic as CCCs come. Are those side wings supposed to be jowls, or arms? Huh. [head tilt] Well, considering there are cookies impaled in them, I'm going to have to guess 'arms'.

Now, those cookies in the middle - are those supposed to be lips, or is Cookie Monster just choking to death? I mean, overall he does kind of have that death-throes look about him, doesn't he? Still, I wouldn't even want to guess what the white icing in the middle is supposed to be - teeth? Foam? (Ewww.)

And while I'm at it, I really should throw these guys in:

It's a whole host of choking cookie monsters! And Kate S., I DO see the difference, I really do.

And look at this: apparently there are lots of decorators out there who have bad childhood memories of Mr. Monster:

Not only do these guys have a pleading look of terror on their faces, they also have their mouths stitched...open? Wait, that can't be right. What is that, then, a mustache? Oh, and would you please get a load of the icing to cupcake ratio? I mean, daaaang.

Sonya G., did you put them out of their misery?

Friday
Sep122008

Inappropriate, Much?


Nothing helps smooth over those awkward early teen years quite like getting a cake with a half-naked stud-muffin on it from your parents, eh, Tracy? Just wait 'til your mom asks to go "halfsies" with you on a lap dance.

I am told that these "Love is" characters were really popular back in the day, so I'm going to assume it wasn't the decorator's idea to draw two nekkid kids of indeterminable gender hugging. However, what the heck is going on behind kid #1? Either that's a tail, and it's wagging, or kid #2 is patting kid #1's butt. Considering the "warm embrace" sentiment, I honestly couldn't say which of those options would creep me out less.

UPDATE: That's hair? Really? I mean, I guess I'll have to take the word of my [cough cough] older and wiser readers, but I still don't see it. Maybe if it wasn't flesh-colored...

Chelsea Y., & Jessica M., love is getting such awesomely inappropriate Wrecks.