Pass The Purell

I don't know about you guys, but it seems like everyone I know has gotten sick with something contagious this winter. Heck, I was sick the entire month of January. Because knowledge is power, I think you ought to know just what the nasties that are causing all this misery look like. We rented a powerful microscope -- hey, we spare no expense for you, our dear readers -- put samples of the germs under the microscope, and magnified them 5000 times. Here's what we found: Let's start with...

Flu

...and landed very, very badly.
("Shhh! It's trying to communicate.")
("Yeah, and it's saying, 'OUCH.'")

You've probably heard of e-coli:

Be careful around this one -- it makes you feel like crap.

I'll bet you think this is the common cold:

Well, it's not.

Most of us are familiar with Strep:

You know, the one that makes you a little hoarse?

And finally, there's Staphylococcus:

Which is the disease that killed Sigmund Freud.

(Actually, it's not. But wouldn't that have been deliciously ironic?)

We hope you've managed to avoid getting sick this winter, because no one wants these in real life, or in cake form.
(If you were "lucky" enough to get one of these, feel free not to share, m'kay?)

Let's spread thanks to Kara W., Tiffany W., Jan Y., Kerrie C., and Katie P., for their infectious senses of humor.

Armed To The Tea

Have you ever wandered through a bakery and thought, "Man, I could really go for a cake shaped like an arm holding a cup of hair right now"?

Well if so, then YOU are a very disturbed individual. Seriously. Maybe you should talk to someone.

But also, you're in luck!

Now, I know what you're thinking, and I completely agree. TOTALLY. But where would we even get a robot monkey at this hour? 

You may also be wondering where the hair is.

There it is!

("I see...THE GRIM. And he's shedding like crazy.")

I'd say it looks like someone plucked out their mustache, but only because there are children present and I wouldn't want this to get too...public. (HI, KIDS.) I'd also go out on a limb and say this baker has single-handedly created the most disarming assault on the funny bone yet - but only because puns make me snort-giggle.

But in case that's not enough hair for you, fear not; there's more!

Ick.

Er, I mean...talk about a hairy situation that must have taken a lot of elbow grease! Haha!

K, I think that's all I've got. SO, let the Professor Trelawney jokes...begin.

Thanks to Julia for reminding us of our universal right to bare arms. (Ok, that's the last one. Promise.)