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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Just Funny (608)

Friday
Mar022018

Write 'Em, Cowboys!

Hey guys, it's time again for our Annual Texas Cowboy Poetry post!

(My apologies in advance to Texas, cowboys, and poetry in general.)

 

Ahem hem hem.

swirling poo vortex
moistly encircles my horse

keep it off the boots.

******

 

There once was a rodeo clown
The best of the whole bunch, hands down.

 

A real Texas Star

 

He's sure to go far

If he'd just stop horsing aroun'.

*****

 

Dangle the Dog's show had to close
The problem? Right under his nose.
Since it's hard to erase
the things on his face...

Now he just does puppet shows.

****

 

Kill.
Kill, kill, kill
KILL!
Killllllllllll....

Kill kill.

*********

 

And for our grand finale, we'd like you to know that John wrote the next one. That's right, JOHN DID IT. So it's not my or Sharyn's fault. We're just saying.

Take it away, John!

 

Once upon a morning dreary, while I sat there, drinking beery,
Thinkin' 'bout this girl I'd ogled at the game the night before.
How we went back to her trailer, thinkin' I was gonna... uh, regale her
Shame she fell into the baler, just below the hayloft door.
"Geez Louise!" I screamed in terror as her bits lay on the floor.
"Now she's boobs... and nothing more!"

 

Thanks to Jodee R., Erica D., Tug T., Samantha R., Kristen, Emily S., & Willow M. for helping John get that off his chest.

*****

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Monday
Feb262018

The Cake Wrecks Guide To Facebook Unfriending

Warning: Adult subject matter. Kinda. Not really.

 

Sometimes we just have to sit down, reflect, and finally ask ourselves, "Who the heck is this guy, and why am I Facebook friends with him?"

Now, I can't tell you EXACTLY who to unfriend, because I don't know the name of the person who decided stretch leggings are not "business appropriate attire." Still, I can offer you a few general guidelines.

 

The Over-Sharer

We also don't need to see that weird growth thing on your elbow, Tom.

 

The Drunk Serial Poster

Nothing says "Mistakes were made last night" quite like a 4AM photo dump of blurry faces, fire hydrants, and the bait-and-tackle aisle at Wal-Mart.

 

The Vague-Booker

It's mysterious and dramatic and they can't tell you ANYTHING until you give them lots and lots of attention.

 

The Racist

Sadly I have even more accurate cakes for this, but I'm not posting them.
You're welcome.

 

That Person Who Thinks Every Onion Headline is Real

[Photo deleted because we finally checked Snopes, and it was fake.]

 

The Humble Brag

(Via Humblebrag, because I actually tried, but still couldn't make this stuff up.)

 

The Always-Irrationally-Angry

Often related to All-Caps-McRanty and Extreme-Politics-R-Us

 

The Creepy Stalker

Granted, we all do a little innocent FB stalking from time to time, but there are sometimes-subtle clues that it may have gone too far.

This is one of them.

 

And to end on a positive note, definitely keep the friends who post Cake Wrecks.

That's the sign of excellent moral character, right there.

 

Thanks to Mandy B., Misty R., Candice, Amber J., Gangi, Peggy C., Brittany U., & Brittany T. for being good friends and following us on Facebook.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.