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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Missed Marks (330)

Wednesday
Aug032011

Vehicular Cakeslaughter

Every now and then - and I'm not saying this happens often - professional bakers have a little trouble making cakes that look like...well, anything. (See examples here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here .)

Perhaps hardest of all is the vehicle cake. There's just something about all those shapes and circles and squares that drives even the most hardened Shop-a-Lot Davinci to edible clip art with the watermarks still on:

Now, if only we had a picture of chocolate drizzle and sprinkles...

So let's say you want KITT from Knight Rider on your cake:

Binka binka binka binka dinka binka dinka binka...

[That was me singing the theme song. Obviously.]

Rather than attempt the entire car, your baker might try to home in on KITT's most distinguishing feature:

The ketchup-and-mustard smear under his seat.


Or how about this tractor?

At first glance, you might think this could be broken down into a simple drawing of two boxes on two wheels.

BUT YOU WOULD BE WRONG.

It's an extremely complicated design, and rendering it in icing is so unbelievably difficult that the finished product would be far beyond the bounds of mere mortal comprehension.

Yeah. Like that.


And finally, let's say your child wants a school bus cake:

(Oh, you know this is going to be good.)


You might end up with this:

It's not short. It's "fun sized!"

Thanks to Andie K., Brooke & Mike K., Lea B., & Pete H. for keeping us on track today.

Friday
Jul152011

A Harry Situation

My friends, today marks a tragic milestone for Harry Potter fans.

It's the day I feature more Harry Potter wrecks.

Ten points from Bakingdor!

And you're to stay after class and chop up every single High School Musical cellphone deco kit.

'Cuz I hate those things.

Here's a positively dizzying array of wreck:

See that photo of the little girl under the cake? She's wearing the same expression I had when *I* first saw this cake: confused, disappointed, and slightly nauseated.

I'll give you a hint on this next one:

It's a golden snitch.

To be fair, maybe it's supposed to be the one Harry spit out.

I'm sorry, but I have to bring back two old favorites:


Eat your heart out, Daniel Radcliffe.

Or maybe just your unfortunately rendered underbite.


Don't you hate it when your Quidditch cakes turns into Harry Potter and the Deathly Gallows?

Tsk, tsk. Such a noose-ance.

EVERYONE REMAIN CALM.

This is not Hedwig:


It's Ron's owl, Pigwidgeon.

Who is a total square.

And finally, while I know not everyone out there loves Harry Potter as much as I do, at least we can all agree on one thing:

There is about to be some SERIOUS nerd rage going on in here.

Thanks to Emily R., Jackie N., Char M., Rebecca J., Erin M., Jesse D., & Michelle M., who think Team Lupin vs Team Snape would work. You know, because of Snape's sparkling personality.