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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Missed Marks (258)

Monday
Jul062009

Well, I'm Stumped

There is a tradition of making wedding cakes that look like tree stumps. Why? Beats me. And since many of them have little shotgun shells decoratively sprinkled around the edges, I'll let one of you ask.

Here's an example of a stump wedding cake, and also what bride Zsofia asked her baker to make for her wedding:

As you can see, it is remarkably stumpy. Now, again, you may be questioning the reasoning behind celebrating a new life of love together with a murdered tree. To this I say: It's not like it's a real tree, so let it go already. Besides, that's not the point.

So what IS the point?

The point, my dear Wreckies, is that Zsofia got THIS for her wedding cake:


See? Betcha don't give a poo-streaked muck pile why people order stump cakes now. Now you just want a better view of this poo-streaked muck pile.

Happy to oblige, my friends, happy to oblige:

This is a wedding cake, people. A wedding cake. For somebody's wedding. Which people were expected to eat. With their mouths.

Now don't get me wrong: the green shredded coconut adds a festive touch to those 15 cent cardboard rounds, and the fake bird is totally workin' it. Still, the bride suspects (and from this photo, I think with good reason) that the cake may have fallen over a few times en route, since in addition to looking - well, like this - it was an hour late to the reception.

Happily, though, Zsofia reports that by the time the cake arrived most of the guests were too drunk to care what the cake looked like, anyway.

[sniffle] Aw, I just love happy endings, don't you?

- Related Wreckage: Inspiration vs Perspiration

Wednesday
Jul012009

Happy Canada Day!

No, my northern friends, I didn't forget about you. For some reason your bakeries just aren't churning out the patriotic-themed Wreckage - and for that I'm torn between congratulating you and scolding you.

Fortunately I do have a few specimens to share, though, and I'll also be sure to liberally sprinkle in some "Eh?"s throughout today's post, to demonstrate my impeccable cultural sensitivity. (I know better than to tick off a country of people wearing those hats with the earflaps and hanging out with moose all day, Ok? I mean... eh?)

First, let us non-Canadians take a gander at what your flag is supposed to look like:


Simple, bold, graphic... I have to say, Canada: I like it. Eh?

And then there's this:

Ah, the airbrush...uniting the world in Wreckage. Eh?

And this:

The finger hole was the result of an over-eager guest, but that "leaf" is pure Wreckerator skill at work. Kinda looks like a monster on a Popsicle stick, doesn't it? Eh?

I'm pretty sure this next one must be from Canada, too, because, well...

...it says "I heart flannel". And we all know what country loves flannel! Eh? (Right now the rest of you are jealous of my superior cultural diversity, aren't you? Yeah, I can tell.)

To leave you on a sweet note - Eh? - check out the beautiful Canadian flag-inspired cake Jessica J. found:

So pretty! It looks like this was displayed at a convention in the Philippines, but I don't see the baker's name listed. You can see more pretty cakes at the source page, though. Eh?

Nicole K., Michaelle P., & Lauren K., I would leave you with lovely French phrase, but I don't know any French.

Auf Wiedersehen!

Eh?