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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Missed Marks (257)

Tuesday
Nov252008

Wrecktopia of Cornucopias

After the turkey, it's the quintessential symbol of Thanksgiving: the ol' Horn of Plenty. It's basically a cone-shaped basket filled with fruit and veggies. Everyone got the mental image? Good. Ok, let's ease 'er on into the Wreckiness, then, shall we?

Not bad, not bad - although my teeth are hurting just looking at that ginormous mound of icing, Kat K. Still, there was skill involved in the execution, and here on Wrecks - as in life - we do our best to focus purely on surface beauty. So, moving on.

Hm, we seem to be veering into "ice cream cone filled with flowers" territory, Jana. Still, not horrendous. Next?

Hey, Jessica H., are we sure this is for Thanksgiving? 'Cuz that looks like a burlap Christmas stocking.

Ack! Shiny poo pile! Keep moving, K.R.! Keep moving!

Ah, this is better. A nice, comfy shag rug. Although, what's that on the side?

Oh heck no, Jill S., they did NOT just ice all over the sides of those paper wrappers, did they? Well, there went the whole "Cupcake-cakes aren't as messy" argument. Plus, with those candy corns and green squigglies and all, it looks like someone upchucked over the edge. Yelch.

Of course, you could go to the other extreme:

Jaime L., these cupcakes aren't all iced together into one solid mass, which means two things:
1) By my definition, it's not *technically* a cupcake cake - maybe more like a "cupcake mosaic". A really lazy mosaic, sure, but still not as evil as a CCC.
2) By anyone's definition, it's not *technically* decorated. A scattering of plastic flotsam does not a decorated cake make.

And speaking of cupcake cakes: some of you took me to task yesterday for failing to point out the CCCs in the Fall Fumbles line up. And yet, when I DO hold up those wrecktastic creations for the derision they are so rightly due, others of you complain that I'm harping on CCCs too much. It's like my own personal Kobayashi Maru, honestly. Anyway, rest assured, dear readers, that my left eye continues to twitch uncontrollably with every CCC posting whether I point out its inherent structural deformity or not.

Monday
Nov242008

Fall Fumbles

(Once again you guys are outdoing yourselves with the Wrecky holiday submissions. So, prepare for some marathon Thanksgiving posts from now 'til T-day!)


It's a football! It's a turkey! It's a...a...stitched up frankencake with pom-poms! And hey, who needs decorating skills when you can just dump the dollar store's clearance bin in with the cake, right, Carol G.?


Apparently Dudley Do Right wishes us all a happy Thanksgiving. Jacquelyn G., do you suppose the decorator actually used shrimp for those ears, or just made it look that way?

"Pumpkins", Lynz B.? You sure those aren't supposed to be melons? (Bah dum bump!)


Kathryn M found this guy. He's supposed to be a scarecrow, so, you know, props to the decorator for really nailing the "scare" part. I know I'm frightened. I mean, it looks like a wookie in a clown suit. A wookie who shaved his face and then used too much self-tanner, I mean.

Of course, scarecrows are pretty complicated to make. So how about a nice candy-corn shaped cookie? Nothing easier than that, right?


Oh come on! Are you kidding me?!?

Never mind, Mary D., just...just never mind.