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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Missed Marks (308)

Tuesday
Mar292016

Spider-Man And Elsa Walk Into The Millennium Falcon... 

Amber's twins were having a birthday, and just so we're clear, by "twins" I mean her actual children. Just covering all the bases for you long-term readers. (FLAAAAASHBAAAAACK.)

Anyhoo, since Amber is one of those awesome moms who doesn't make her kids share a cake, she ordered two. First, this Spider-Man design:

...which ended up looking surprisingly good!

 

Unless maybe you can read:

Why is "Spiders Man" there?
(Spiders Man says: "I'm not even supposed to be here today.")

I like how the baker combined the D and the A, though. Good space-saver.

 

Well, we can hope Amber's other cake came out OK, right?

Ohhh, hang on, she ordered which design?

ABANDON HOPE NOW.

 

::sigh::
Oh, look. Now the mountains are saggy balls with spooge on top.
::bigger sigh::
::that ends with head on keyboard::
::followed by a long moment of silence::

 

Of course, by now we've seen approximately three metric crap-tons of Frozen wrecks - so let's switch it up a bit and see how Vanessa fared with this new Star Wars design:

Vanessa asked the bakery to make a round version, which they said was no problem.

Uh... Wreckies?

WE HAVE A PROBLEM.

Note Vanessa's hand holding up the cake from behind.

The cherry on top was when the baker who handed her the cake said, "There wasn't any room for decorations," and plopped down a plastic bag with all the ships and stuff in it.

DROID PLEASE.

 

Thanks to Amber S. & Vanessa B. for wreckin' it by the book.

*****

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Thursday
Mar172016

St. Patrick's Intervention

It's bad enough that so many St. Patrick's cakes are shaped like beer, bakers:

 

Do you have to actually be drunk while decorating them, too?

*hic* "I hash an eye-shing bag. WHEEEEEE!!"

 

"yerp. LOOKS GOOD."

 

"I like to make 'em like a chorus line of cacta... cactses.. cactusesesess... cacti."

 

"Guys. Guys. Guys. Check it.

"I put lil' HATS on this cake's BOOBS."

 

And to the baker who was so proud of this penmanship:

They actually asked for "Happy St. Patrick's Day."

BUT I LIKE IT.

 

Thanks to Gina L., Gina M., Doug G., Dara M., Holly F., & Shannon M. for my new favorite holiday abbreviation. HAPPY PAPRACK TO ALL!

*****

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