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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Missed Marks (269)

Monday
Jul262010

Conventional Wisdom

It's possible that I just spent the last four days relentlessly Twitter-stalking everyone at San Diego Comic Con. Possible. You can't prove it. What do you mean, when did I shower last? I'm going for an authentic experience here! Gimmie back my Funyuns.

Anyway, coming down off a convention high - even one acquired vicariously through social networking sites - requires a gradual withdrawal. Yesterday's Sweets helped a little, but really, they were just too good. I need a visual sucker punch to knock me back into reality, you know?

Theeere it is.


Convention...high...evaporating....

And for that final cold blast of reality, this should fit the Bill:

"Oh nooooo!"

I could probably end there, but frankly, this is too much fun.

First rule of cons: always pick a costume that's size-appropriate:

This also applies with cake kits.

Second rule of cons: a lone mask does not a costume make.

Come to think of it, that *also* applies to cakes. And cookies.

Third rule of cons: Lace is never intimidating.


"Join me, Luke, and together we can rule the galaxy as father and...what? What's so funny? Why are you laughing?

"Is it the doily? It is, isn't it? Hutt nuts, I told Palpatine no one would take me seriously in this thing."

And finally, the Na'vi Nazis are here to show us what happens when you mix your sci-fi references:


See, I told them not to open that ark. [shudder] Blech.

Thanks, Deborah, Laux, Shawn F., Tharry, Lizzy S., Julie Anne D., & Shanell C.! See y'all at Dragon*Con. ;)

Note from john: The first cake is supposed to be Iron Man. We think. Most likely. Probably. Okay I'm like 63% sure.

Nappy Blob Blob Katelynn!

Monday
Jul192010

Go Figure!

Today, class, we're going to learn the fine art of figure drawing.


First, decide if you want your figure to be male or female.

Both will only confuse people.

Next, arrange the limbs in a natural, comfortable-looking manner...


...always remembering that there are some things the human body simply cannot do.


Special circumstances, such as pregnancy, may be approached with a certain amount of artistic license. If the mom-to-be is self-conscious, feel free to make her stomach just a bit smaller than in reality.

The head should be connected with a graceful, appropriately proportioned neck:


If, however, you find that your head and body do not match up, simply employ the "hand out of nowhere" technique:

If anyone asks, it's doing a shadow puppet.

Or, if you find that hands are too difficult, simply leave them off:


Or for that matter, just omit all of the limbs and the head. After all, a well-drawn torso is more than capable of communicating the innate vitality and smooth, vivaciousness of youth:

Mmmm. Smooooth.

Thanks, Jessica G., Amy K., Misty S., Lynne T., Jessica S., Julie B., Bianca L., & Brinn M.! Win or lose, these Wrecks are quite the draw.